.x. the perfectionist .x. + . . [ [ :: mAinez

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

knowing that im not alone and i have someone loving me deeply...

but nevertheless, my tears still roll down for you. and i duno why.. you?

was it fated that we just wun become an item? was it fated to suffer for you? was it just so fated that im being miserable for you?

my heart is aching. and it really hurts. i've been keeping everything to myself.. and just to myself.. im torturing myself for a never gonna come true dream.

is there a need... that we wun be frenz? is there a need to not contact? what's the problem? and what's wrong? im left with so many qns mark.

if you no longer love me, just say it straight and not avoiding.. you are dragging it.. not solving it. running away is not the solution. it hurts me and you. that's provided you still feel for me.

my bday wishes will never come true.. for last yrs' and for this coming one... never will come true... and yes... im crying again!

pathetic! pathetic me!!

the only 3 i fall deeply before. hurt deeply. and other than hurt.. it's still hurt.

promises are so fake. no longer believe in it. NO LONGER!!

one and only is bullshit.
forever is rubbish.

just as simple. wana a simple love frm my love one.
a simple life.
a simple relationship.
just so simple..

but it dun seems to be simple at all...

so what will be the simplest?

stop listening to songs that remind me of you.
stop looking thru the photos.
stop looking thru the msgs you sent.
stop stop stop..
but why i dun seem to stop missing you?
why i dun seem to stop feeling hurt?

remember bidding for a tshirt till $300+... won the bid but.. in the end gave up to others.
thinking how silly am i to even look thru the website everyday at that point of time for one tshirt.

after all that i recall.. you are the one being silly or am i the one?

the blog i created is gone. and no words in memory i can view at. but yet.. the silly me.. knew that the website will be gone someday.. i copied and save it into a file before it's gone. haha.

so... i believe.. i had enough of waiting.
waiting for your msg.
waiting for you to be online.
waiting for a letter.
waiting for an email.
waiting for a parcel.
waiting...
comparing the 7 years.. yesh.. it is just 1 year of waiting.. but im a gal... and wait is not supposed to be in my dictionary.

what's the point of waiting for miracle to happen?
maybe.. you are attached with some gal.. happily living in you own sweet world. maybe.. you realised you never once love me before.

tired of this.
tired of everything.
tired of every single thing that is connected to you.
im really tired le.

i know i've to give up waiting.. give up expecting for miracle to happen.. that's what i know i must do.. but my heart dun wana follow.

and i know.. my heart is dead and the only person to save it..

it's you.

pls stop avoiding.. AND FACE ME CAN?

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:35:00 AM

Saturday, April 15, 2006

i hate it when im restricted to have gathering with my friends.
i hate it when i need to quarrel with ppl.
i hate it when i need to report wherever i go.
i hate it when i dun get to play and enjoy coz of what you messaged.
i hate it hate it hate it!!

even my parent nv ask me where am i going.
even my parent nv ask me to report.

WHY must i report?

i dont like.

you know me for so long. you know my character. you know my attitude. why i nv restrict on you and you want to restrict me? it's not about not bothering or whatever lor. i just felt tat is there really a need to tell you where i go, who i go with, when to go home, what i do? say liao you not happy, nv say also not happy! I DUNO WHAT YOU WAN!

fuck off. i hate myself so much. and it's you who make me HATE myself!!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:02:00 AM

Sunday, April 02, 2006

change of blog url.

here.

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:32:00 AM

Monday, October 10, 2005

SILOSO. maine. serene.

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:30:00 PM

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Extracted from Stanley's website:

There was this guy who loved two gals at the same time but he didn't know which one he loved more.

Someone taught him. Ask yourself this question and answer it honestly :

"When you are happy, which gal would you want to share your happiness with?" The one you think of is someone you love.

Ask yourself another question and answer it honestly :

"When you are sad, which gal you want to share your burden with?"

The one you think of is also someone you love.

If you think of the same gal when you are happy & sad, that's the most perfect. But if you don't think of the same gal, I would advise you to chose the one you are willing to share your sadness with.In life, there are more sorrows than happiness.

There are too many people that u meet that u can share your happiness with, not necessary your lover.

If you live your life happily, you can also enjoy it alone.

In sadness, however, there are not many people willing to share your burden with you. If you are willing to tell someone your happiness, I am sure that person has got to be someone close & an understanding person to you.But it shouldn't stop there.

If that person only thinks of you when she is happy, but looks for someone else when she is sad, this lover is too unstable, she doesn't treat you as someone she can spend the rest of her life with.

Of course, I will be very happy if I am the first person to share her happiness. But, if she is sad, I will be too willing to stay by her side & ease her pain. Only then, will I believe that I hold a very important position in her heart.

If you are sad, who comes to your mind first?

interesting post isnt it? than who will be first one that come to my mind? actually.. to be exact.. it's ling bah.. cause after all.. she was the one going through all my sadness with me. and she was the one that picked me up from my sadness. =) and yeah.. she was the one that accompany me all these years.. how blessed am i to have her right? ahaha.. =)

school is fun today. full or crap and stupid things done by shirley and ashlynn.. pictures speak a thousand words right? ahaha.. i shall post pictures den...

this bag belongs to Shirley and that small little thingy has her name, address and telephone on it. she's afraid that her bag will go missing.. =x

and now she make it easier to tap her ezlink... the whole idea is.. Shirley is like primary school kid.. she need to put her name on everything she own. so that when it go missing, people can return it to her! weehee!! how cool to be 21 yet act like primary school kid.. OPPS... =x

please take a look at our ah niu ge~~ (yesh!! no doubt... it's Jon when he was in sec 3!!)

and yesh.. this will be how our mei zhen will look like in 20 years later. being the successful woman who created "mei zhen xiang ba gua" with the super rich look playing around with her "chanel's" specs..

so now everyone can visualise how interesting my class can be and how interesting lesson can be with funny yet interesting people like US!! ahaha.. self praise... weehee!! =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:49:00 AM

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

afraid or fear? to be strong and brave?

Replying on what girl's comment.

it's not fear bah... it's more like... you know the possibility of giving that person happiness is less than 50%.. so how to be strong and brave? knowing what kind of girl am i.. where the hell do I have the right to allow anyone to suffer with me? regrets.... there will sure be regret... but i rather regret and be miserable myself than making another person suffer with me..

maybe in future... i will make my love life a special and a worthwhile one. With no regrets or unhappiness yet only happiness and happy memories.

for now... with no confidence in making my love one happy, i would not allow myself to hurt anyone.

not a very satisfied reply right? sometimes.. i also dont understand myself..

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:21:00 AM

i think ms serene neo is too high waiting for me to blog my post.

she will be the first one to read sia...

she is laughing and laughing in front of her com. she is now inside my screen (webcam) pointing her "lovely" middle finger at me.. and now she try to box me through the webcam...

she intend to get herself a bag to cover her face tomorrow.. cause of her silly and lame action.. she got no face to go out...

hMmmm.. need to buy her the bag sia... but before that, i shall get a goldfish first.. must measure the length of the eyes of the goldfish... and cut out for her to view... weehee... =x

im blessed to have this silly yet lovely little gal as my sister... she is simply so cute and chio.. oh my oh my.. and you all shld be wondering how much that salesperson is so INTERESTED in her.. pls dun deny.. ADMIT IT.....

well well... love love love.. my little princess.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:20:00 AM

album of serene neo!

she is trying to cover her mike.... or she is going to burp soon?? -_- i think... BOTH!!

" oh no... burp too much.. headache... i think my head going to drop.. better hold it tight.."

she is laying down as if that's her house sofa... oh my oh my.. my QUEEN~!!

for once... she took the picture properly.. and so.. now.. she is pretty... =)

oh my... GOLDFISH EYES WITH HOTDOG LIPS... =x OPPS!! she's going to hit me soon!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:07:00 AM

Monday, August 29, 2005

fun fun fun... miss darling mei so much!

im going to blog down serene neo xiao ling's stupid cum silly cum lame action!!

everything started off with me being late to meet her. she starts to grumble that im stupid and im slow.. and im only late for 15 mins due to the stupids lots of traffic light along bukit timah road. =x

so... we went kLunch as planned.. i ordered sushi and ice lemon tea. she ordered sushi and coke light. so~ she started choosing songs and be the first to sing.. while im her audience... listening to some "superstar" singing liang jing ru's song. maybe due to the songs that we chosen are too saddening, i suggest choosing some happening songs to sing. she continue eating her sushi as if she didnt eat for the past few days. (she is VERY hungry!) after eating, she starts to sing again.. or rather sing and burp at the same time. =x after singing a few sentences, she suddenly burp for a few times. =x alright.. my turn to sing den and she continue to burp. meanwhile she drink her coke light too. after a few songs with burping... we realised that it's the coke light tat cause her to burp. yet... SHE CONTINUE DRINKING HER COKE LIGHT... as she said tat.. by drinking coke.. she will burp and "da tong jin mai" and warm up her voice to the limit she wants. so.. she continue to sing, drink and BURP!! -_-

as im singing "gu dan ba lei", she create her own dance step and dance beside me. her dance steps are super similar to those africa dance. =x opps... her "tong bao"!

while we are playing around with those fast song and stupid dance step.. a waiter came in and he saw her silly and lame dance steps, he laughed. The next time he came in, he laughed again.. oh my.. we felt so pai seh sia.. =x is her silly dance that made the waiter laughed yet she blame me on having an affair with the kbox guy.. coz he laughing at us..

we had been targeted by a lot of people today. first is the one outside hmv.. that guy wants us to spare him some time and ask us not to worry, he is not a pervert.. duH~ of course we know pervert would not be so "guang ming zheng da". without giving him any chance to say anything, we just walked off. second is the one at wisma underpass. this guy wants us to spare him some time too and ask us not to worry too.. cause he is not a salesman. ahaha.. i realised, guys are so pathetic recently.. still.. we also didnt give him any chance to talk.

but but but... ms serene neo said tat i seduce that saleperson on the road lei.. HOW SAD!!! with my standard... I WILL SEDUCE THAT KIND OF LOOK OF GUY?? -_- how sad.... you think i despo ar? i think tat saleperson is interested in serene neo yet she trying to push him to me.. hmpf..

we went far east... buy her slippers that only go to market.. =x and i got her a belt and bring her to trim her eyebrow.. heex.. though not a VERY long day.. but we had a lot of fun ya...

lesson to learn!
- if you wana sing, dun drink coke, you will end up burping all day long.
- if you wana "da tong jing mai", drink coke.
- if you feel that by drinking coke can help to warm up ur voice, go ahead.
- if you wana make urself hyper, sing fast song.
- if you wana dance, learn africa dancing frm ms serene neo.
- if you wan guys to be interested in you, ask serene neo how to seduce.
- if you wana get a slipper tat only can wear to the market, pls purchase at far east. it's 2 pairs for $10.

for the lesson above, it's proudly presented to you by ms serene neo xiao ling.

now i know, in the oldies, how those play "wu gong" people "da tong jing mai" already.

WAH~ coke have been around for centuries liao sia!! hmmm...

now den i noe........................

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:10:00 PM

Friday, August 26, 2005

relationship?

You love me but yet you don't know who am I. Im torn between this life I lead and where I stand. If you don't know who I am, just let me go.

I want someone to understand, to be there for me when i am feeling down. I dont like the feeling of insecurity...

Don't ever judge someone by it's cover. I finished watching my vcd. hate that bitchy stepmother and stepsister. They are so fake!! oh my.. -_- and that father is just so stupid! His daughter is being bullied yet he did not realise.. -_-

how i wish i have such a person waiting for me.. even though im dead, he won't forget about me. even if i forget about him, he will try his best to make me remember. even if i hate him, he will do his best to make me forgive him. even if i dun love him, he will still tell me how much he loves me. do i have such a person beside me? hMmmmm... i think..... i have...... (blessed with love) =)

i cried upon reading some stuff. Im not sad. im not unhappy. im just........ touched.

girls alway wish for a whirlwind romance, with fairytale kind of ending. The prince will be together with the princess. But does all this sound realistic? I love to daydream... only in my dream, such romance occur, but realistically in the real world, love aint like that.

what am i scared of? the imperfect love that i might face? or the imperfect me that im going to show? as known, im stubborn, bad tempered, princess like character, dont give in, dont give way, dont save up, dont behave, demanding, wild, playful. a girl like me, how will i have the courage to give anyone happiness? like I have mentioned before, or i just dont have confidence in myself?

nothing is perfect? but what if i just want it to be perfect? Sometime, life just doesnt go your way. and people will start to grumble why god is being so unfair to them. Life is not handed to you in a nice gift wrapped parcel with a lovely bow on top. You have to wrap it nicely and bring that lovely bow to add on it yourself.

Expectation brings Disappointment.

Comparing brings Sadness

Love brings Hate

Hate brings Forgive

Forgive brings Forget

and so it goes on.

why would people like to compare so much? what's so nice to compare? why would they compare their past with their present partner? or why they just love comparing?

What's love about? When you love someone, what's the defination of it? trust, patience, compromise, commitment, love, character? they are main factors in a relationship? how about communication then? if couple cant communicate, how will the relationship last? Without communication, constant miscommunication will happen which most often lead to quarrels on who's right and who's wrong.

the courtship period compared to the dating period.. why is it different? relationship need something interesting to spice up the love between 2 person. there's time for surprises. time for romance. time for fun. you cant just do nothing yet keep saying that you love him/her.

I read from the internet. It says that sometimes when you finally have the person you love perhaps after a year of courtship or having a crush on that person you think thats the end. Relationships do break because parties think they are safe and that they do not need to do anything extra and just ride on the relationship wave, or that they are too busy for anything else, even for their own partners and they think its alright cause they assume that their partners will always be there. Some relationships even break because couples get bored with each other cause there's nothing there to spice up the relationship cause they think their love for each other is enough and they are waiting for each other to do something.

There's a need to show action to your partner in order to let them know that they are being loved by you. What matter is the thoughts that count.

A relationship takes two hands to clap and sometimes someone has to take the initiative first.

Dont suffocate him/her with your possessive behaviour. Giving each other some space and freedom. Having the mutual respect and trust are important. If you really dont wish to lose your love one, do learn to trust.

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:06:00 PM

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

darling mei's bday celebration

had a fun fun fun fri night.. even though it's only with a pathetic small group of frenz but yet, i think ling still enjoyed herself ya. =) hohoho.. she's one year older again.. heex. as long as close frenz and family remember your bday, tat's enough le aR? =)

before going black, we waited and waited for our darling gal's mr prince to reach. -_- a long wait ar.. but anyway, lucky there's no queues. everyone seems to be more interested in momo den black now ar? hmmm..

as usual, we still make use of ppl who "over-wear" and "over-dance".. CMI... ahaha.. juz buay tahan some of them. not saying we wear until very pretty la.. but den.. eh.. eh.. eh... alright, shall not be bad den.. =X

i think the most buay tahan thing is... the "poser". she just keep copy how ppl dance lor.. just funny!! ahaha.. =x but overall, okie la... she's still a nice gal.

enjoyed still.. =) after black, went coffee club for lunch/dinner/supper. 3 meals combine to one! weehee.. had pasta and wedges.. yummy.. but i realised, IT'S EXPENSIVE! i mean really EXPENSIVE! hmpf!

home sweet home after supper.. and den... i gone into coma......

thought of my great supper at coffee club, im feeling kind of hungry now yet i have no appetite.. coz i din eat my lunch and dinner yest.. and i haven eat my breakfast and lunch today.. eh.. great way to go on diet... eh.... =x

sister means sister ya.. she noe me the best bah... the moment i called her.. she console me with her sweetie voice and asked me not to be sad... joke with me.. telling me that she got eat.. if not she will be blown away by the wind. and i can attached a string to her and fly kite at marina. she remind me to use a good quality string. if happens that the string snap, i will go and find and catch her back. and she give a good idea by inputing detector so that i can find her no matter where she go.. ahaha......... i wonder how long can this joke make me laugh whenever i thought of it. =) but thanks.. i felt content having you all these years... no matter how hard other push me down... i know you will be there to pull me up.. no matter how much we missed out due to studies, we still manage to overcome everything and stayed close with each other... im glad and i will learn to be content with watever i have.. =)

i will be fine....... and i will not think too much. even if it's changing..... other den crying, there's nothing i can do too.. the only solution is me.

i just realised... nope.. i know it all along.. i am such a crybaby.... i admit it.

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:51:00 PM

holding on?

holding on is the right way out ma?

letting go will be better ma? letting go.. there would not be anymore misery and sadness.

why hold on when everything is over? and why hold on when love is not getting anywhere between the two of you?

it applies to something you expect on yet in the end, it turn out to be disappointment. den why hold on to that expectation still?

sometimes, i wonder.. im the one that dun understand myself or am i the one leading people to misunderstand me?

it's time to change? as in.. grow up? should not let it affect me so much? mindset problem? or just thinking too much.........??

communication break down or i did something wrong or i said anything wrong? can someone tell me??

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:44:00 PM

a sweet yet lame story

would u forgive a guy that lie to you..? and would you still love him?

He met her at a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so
normal, nobody paid attention to him.

At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him. She was surprised, but out of
politeness, she agreed.

They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything... She felt uncomfortable, she
thought, please, let me go home.

Suddenly, he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."

Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously, "Why do you have this hobby?". He replied,"When I was a little boy, I used to live near the sea. I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown... I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there".

While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched.

That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can talk about his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of
home. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her
family...

That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story.

They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm,careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married the prince, then they lived happy life... And, every time she made coffee
for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you - the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time.. Actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our
communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything. Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth. I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste. But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never felt sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, I still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again".

Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her,"What's the taste of
salty coffee?"."It's sweet", she replied.

love is not to forget, but to forgive. Not to see but understand. Not to hear but to listen. Not to let go but HOLD ON !!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:38:00 PM

Monday, August 22, 2005

My Love Rating

You have a sophisticated attitude that is also generous and considerate. Your responsible, charitable nature may find you attracting guys who want someone to confide in or who makes them feel secure. At a very young age, you developed the type of personality that makes others feel safe and protected. You will carry these qualities into your adult years and, down the road, you'll be a good mom because of them. On the negative side, you can be argumentative and overly emotional, and you usually possess a temper that can make everyone run for cover. You like the kind of guy who is responsible and impeccably dressed and has gorgeous eyes and a great body. Charm, wit and (of course) brilliance could make him the perfect guy for you.......

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:49:00 PM

Friday, August 19, 2005

isolation

im isolating myself or the world isolate me?

out of the sudden, feeling very sad.. wana go out and have some fresh air.. but oso duno wher to go.. gal and lao da are busy with their work.. dun wish to bother them too.. and they nv bother abt me oso.. wana tok but find no one.. darling mei still schooling.. and everyone seems to be too busy for me.. how pathetic can i be...

inside another classroom now.. tears roll down automatically.. i dun wana cry.. and i oso duno wat im crying for.. mood swing bah.. swing till i duno wat im sad of.. or wat im unhappy of........

feel like watching some super sad movie or drama and cry out loud. im juz making an excuse to cry.....

tears never runs out hor? wonder if there will be a day.. i cry and cry till there's no more tears..

im thinking too much? being too sensative? or there's really changes yet i din noe about it? im being taken for granted or i take people for granted?

what's friends all about? being there will you need them right? im alwayz there.... but why no one is here?

or izzit.... im just isolating myself?

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:41:00 PM

KELLY WON!!

im so happy.. yeah.. indeed. =)

i vote a lot for her and i asked a lot of people to vote for her. im so happy tat she got in. yEAH!! cry no more...!! weehee!! =) but den.. it's quite "out of no where" that kevin will win.. im expecting junyang.. hmMmm.. how sad..!!

oh my.. cant see junyang at indoor stadium le.. but nvm.. i see kelly den.. hmm... wonder how to get the tickets to indoor stadium? i wana go and watch.. =x by the way, i will confirm buy kelly's single. HEEX!! im a great supporter!! weehee!!! =))

forgot to mention abt this great series that i watched recently.. it's the "stairway to heaven". wah!! NICE!! the show is nice.. i like korean show even though it makes me cry like hell.. but i still like!! ahaha.. intending to buy the vcd.. hmmm.. shld i? it cost $30+... worth it ma? actually channel u is showing le.. but i find it very draggy... only mon and tue showing.. muz like wait until duno when den can complete the whole show sia.. i think if i buy.. im going to eat grass soon.. hMpf.. no no.. muz save for lesson. haiz..

sch juz so sian.. yAwnz... i wana go out.. shop shop... play play... dance dance... have fun... weehee!! all the way tonight!! heex.. enjoy like never ending!! yeah!! =D

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:25:00 AM

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

bday celebration?

darling mei bday is coming. how is she going to celebrate lei?

everyone get so excited over bday ar? hmmm... why im not?

see gal.. her bday is on nov... and she is thinking and planning now le.. ahaha.. i think wat she said make sense too... but den... im not very into my bday.. therefore, dun intend to open chalet. but tat doesnt mean can forget abt presents. =X actually, i dun need anything now. wat i need most is CASH. please give me ang baos instead. ahaha. like wat i did to ling last year. i think she needs cash too. shall i do the same?

it's true right? giving me ang bao den let me buy the things i wan myself is better den getting something i dun need it. though i noe it's the thought that counts, i do appreciate but i still prefer something i really need.

i wana learn driving. and i need to save up for it. dun really wana rely on mummy and burden her, so i wana save up. after all, im a grown up le. time to save for my future. =)

i just realised, actually i din really celebrate my bday. the happiest bday i had... i think is during kindergarden when i dun really remember and only recall bits thru the photos i have. other den tat, the most contented celebration was obviously with my dearest sister, ling. remember the whole celebration took place at her place. and of coz, there's someone beside me at tat point of time. i miss tat person. =) miss tat BIG snoopy and woodstock cake. miss those presents. miss the hUgz tat person gave. miss the kisses tat person gave. miss miss miss!! it's was my first bday with my beloved! tat person even wished me on 98.7 =)

after tat, bday had been like plain water to me. normal day lor. not much celebration. not much fun. juz normal normal and spend my bday. in the past, dad and mum will bring me out to eat and stuff, but now, like very seldom le lei. but i noe, i will alwayz have cake on my bday de. coz mummy noe tat i like tat chocolate cake frm tat cake shop. heex. the cake is easy to get, but it's the thought tat count. she would not miss out my fav cake de. =)

so how abt this year? eh.. actually.. i intend to off my hp at 23:58 on 7/10 and slp till morning den on my hp. silence bday celebration. -_- lame i noe.. ahaha.. coz im not expecting any surprises or planned celebration frm anyone.

busy over fyp the whole day... im quite wore out now. tired!! tml still got test, and i think im not going to make it coz i din study at all. dUh~ gotta base on normal days learning le lor. *yawnz. time to get some slp... but wait till i finish with something important first. weehee.

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:55:00 AM

Sunday, August 14, 2005

rUsh on friday.. was fun. i get too high after drinking 3 jugs.. -_-

meet gal, baby and jian at cine around 9 plus and we set off to MS straight away. i find tat i look weird somehow. waited and waited for bao bei and frenz. k.. im getting a bit pissed while waiting for them. ahem.

they reached while we headed to united square for the ATM. im pissed, so i juz smiled and walk away when i saw them. -_- i admit im sian half. ahaha. i walked to the road side waiting for gal, jian and baby to cross the road together. without me noticing.. baby pop out with a bouquet of purple rose. oh my god. it's purple! NOT DYED! NATURAL PURPLE! faintz. i love it man. duH~ purple is one of my fav. colour, therefore i got a little high upon receiving the purple rose. thanks baby. how sweet. i know she took a hard time looking for it as purple rose is really very rare. and it's costy too! pls baby, dun wast such money anymore. save it for urself ya. =) but still, thanks. =)

so im no longer pissed. den went into rush and soon find a place to chill. drinking and enjoying the music and entertainment show. =X i was joking with them tat we are not at ruSh.. we are at mandai zoo. =x alright, i think gal understand. ahaha.

a tiny cup of whisky wun make me high enough to play. so i continued my sian mode for abt 1 hour. den gal and i shared to get ourseleves a jug. in the end, we have one each. promotion, 2 jugs is cheaper ma. ahaha. =x soon, gal left after ben came to fetch her and she left her half jug behind. and yeapz, it belongs to me den! ahaha. =x 1 and 1/2 jugs is still not strong enough to make me high. baby and bao bei ordered another 2 jugs. weehee.. in order not to get them drunk(they duno how to drink), i finished another jug within 10 mins. oh my, drinking it in fast speed, the easier i will get high. soon, they saw me dancing le. ahaha.. den i finished baobei's half jug too.. oPps.. =x so i follow xiang to dance and enjoy ourselves. ahaha.. lame right, but i had fun.

suffered from hang over the next morning, but den... nvm.. ahaha.. =x actually, i got no idea why i drink so much. stressed over fyp bah.. hMmmm... no comment... ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -8:52:00 PM

good bf VS good husband

i wan it all. i wan a good bf AS WELL AS a good husband.

reflecting on wat jess and gal "argued" about... hmm.. im greedy.. i wan it all. =) *grins. having a good bf.. and knowing tat ur bf will be able to be a good husband too. apart frm tat, he has to be the kids daddy too. i believe... to date with the right guy and get married with him and have his kids... you will get the perfect happiness.. you gotta find the suitable one. sharing a common interest. able to tolerate. able to give in. able to be faithful. able to understand. able to be there alwayz. able to give up everything coz of you. able to pass thru parents. able to communicate with your frenz.

but duH~ easy to say, hard to find right?

meet with so many experience over friend's bf and stuff. there will sure be comment, sure be sarcastic. not all your close frenz will like your bf, if happens tat you gotta choose between bf and frenz... HOW? yUckz.. i hate to meet with such situation... -_-

how to become a couple? the most important thing is whether each other suits to be together or not. If lifestyle is different, try to change? if nothing in common, create one? if anyone were to change bcoz of someone, how will they be happy? how will they be themselves? i dun wish to make anyone change for me.. but yet.. i alwayz do so~...

as said, im too demanding le. either you change for me, or tat's it.

i admit it. im selfish. but no choice. it's my character to be playful, to be wild, to be demanding, to be unreasonable, to be bad tempered. yesh, and i admit tat im really tat bad. ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -8:36:00 PM

Friday, August 12, 2005

insignificant in life

insignificant in life
a lonely girl you wont really understand
often misunderstood and hurt
waiting for a little attentive heart
and drops of care
little time and effort but not granted

dependant girl
struggling hard but lost
abandoned in the dark
stained with neglection and pain
the fear overwhelming
she avoids all

darkness in her world
probably the brightest shade of light

shutting herself out
contented living alone
trying hard to let go now
over the walls around her heart
once again trying to reach out.. for love

this little hands reaching out, uncertainty
hold it dear.. never let go
you are all she really need
but yet she closed up her heart again.

i am just an ordinary gal
hold me close.. dry my tears.

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:35:00 AM

just finished my test. it sux. simply got no time to complete it. so many question and all wordy question.. -__- see liao, just so sian! or maybe my mind is being affected.....

im still thinking... tired, yet my mind just cant stop thinking. i dun wana think too much, but just... cant.

i seriously got no idea am i prepared to let another person to step into my life.. my world.. my heart. or the "long forgotten" have been occupying the heart and doesnt allow anyone to step in?

like said... im still young... to commit.... am i ready for it?

mummy been asking me to study hard recently.. i think she a bit siao siao or she's actually hinting me not to think too much about other except for studies? haiz.

im starting to feel the pressure........................ today is friday le.........................

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:15:00 AM

fear the future

im afraid.......

actually... im not ready yet... the feeling is not right yet... or am i just thinking too much?

a new start? a new life? a new relationship? am i sure im ready for it?

oh my.... im so not myself....... or am i changing?

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:27:00 AM

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

out of no where!

hmmm.. late le ar? i just remembered.. i have to wake up at 8am tml.. eh.. is today! *yawnz

just got the urge to change template. hmmm.. a quick one la.. coz the pic is from the internet de. just have to edit a bit and put in my details can le...

gal been wanting a new template.. made one for her too.. but duno she like it anot.. hmMmm...

im suppose to be doing fyp right? yeapx.. i did a bit.. now left with 3 frames nia.. shall continue tml lor.. =x

why the title is out of no where? coz.. out of no where.. i suddenly pop out with a template.. and out of no where.. im feeling alone....... as i said... im pathetic.. okie.. i realised!

missing my darling mei.. missing my dearest lao da.. missing my darling gal.. missing my guan yin ma.. missing school? yUCkz.. nah~!

ever wonder it's actually very hard to get true frenz? some might be there to play together, have fun together, but where comes to problems.... no one actually really understand. you might feel tat some understand, but they actually dun.

[i just wana share it with you. i mean it when i said keep it to yourself. why betray my trust? im not angry but sad. i trusted you, but you disappoint me. i cried not bcoz im a crybaby, but it hurt me deeply.]

this sentense sound so harsh. i used it before. and i din regret. dun take my "good" for granted. i can be very nice to you, yet i can be nasty too.

darling mei should understand ya. missing von.. missing ling.. missing the "4 of us".

thinking too much today ar?

nah~

i might be too quiet at times. i might be out of your topic at times. i might show not interest in wat you said at times. i might not be too sensative at times. i might not be the first one to reach out for you when you need someone. i might be too boring but..... seriously, i do cherish my sisters, darlings and frenz.. ppl who care for me and love me. they mean more den my stead. i care and love them as well. i will be there for them alwayz.

i dun wish.... the history repeats.

ANGEL_scribbled * -5:35:00 AM

i alwayz thought as time goes by.. people will tend to be more mature and grown up.. but i realise, it doesnt apply to all.. how sad right? it's true tat, whenever he chat with me, we will ended up quarreling or making me pissed off.. and it's alwayz! actually.. im refering to an incident tat took place on fri.. took sometime to blog it out... heex..

went for NDP just now.. wah.. i never enjoyed ndp in the past, but this year, the feeling is different ya. maybe bcoz it's at the padang, tat's why bah. well, it's really a great experience. =) but i dun enjoy the trip back home. roads are block, therefore daddy din drive to city hall. we took MRT instead. at the end of NDP, city hall is packed with human. and i mean ALL types of human. they.. or rather we all stinks! and imagine, all stinkos sticked together, squeeze to get into the train.. yUckz.. it's disgusting.. -_-

i juz realise, my holiday is very packed with programs. sat went to grandpa hse. sun stayed at home, though sick, still busy with housework. mon went to register for basic. tue went for ndp. wed im going to mummy office. fruitful holiday right? though not very "interesting", but somehow, i enjoyed it. but still, im sick!

i thought im recovering.. but cough seems to get worse.. flu okie le.. but now cough bah.. -_-

touching up on fyp later.. hmmm.. i finishing le.. yeah! juz some more things to touched up bah.. heex.. =)

seriously.. i never been good with remembering dates. i only remember dates tat really mean to me. my bestie bday. my family member bday. my ex bday. anniversary with ex. darlings bday. some frenz bday. i never go into details on when and when some events took placed..

to the silliest boy ever:

sorry.. im not good in dates, but you actually list down all the dates. =) as you mention, i really forgot when was the last time we went out together. stop looking at me when we are watching movie.. i noe i look stupid when i cover myself with my jacket during those scary parts. ahem.. actually, i never once dun believe in you. after all, know each other for so long le, somehow will know how's your character like ya. i believe that you are saying the truth k. =) you really changed a lot as compared to secondary school. maybe bcoz of me bah. if during secondary school, you are not as shy....... loving a girl for 6 years plus is silly enough le. beside tat in between these 6 years, you noe tat she got bf yet you still love her? izzit it silly enough? wana find out about my life, yet dun dare to call me. izzit it silly enough? alwayz like to think so much and mislead urself. izzit it silly enough? you alwayz like to assume what you think without asking me is it true. izzit it silly? so now you know right? why i alway said that you are silly.. ahem.. and i might not be the gal tat worth your 7 years of waiting....

i know it myself. im very demanding and unreasonable. that makes me not fit to be loved and not worth to be loved. a gal with super bad temper and super princess character. who can tolerate me? maybe at the beginning okie... but after honeymoon period, everything will go back to normal. i began to wonder... actually, i have no confidence in myself too.

wat's known as the honeymoon period? couples saying "i love you" everyday, every night. den meeting up everyday, every night. surprises everyday, every night. no quarrels. no tolerating. alwayz giving in. normally, this stays for about 1 year +. some are even faster, like say, half a year. how to maintain a long term relationship? how to face a person for long? how to tolerate a person temper for long? i wonder. i just realised, actually, all along, my exs were the one tolerating and giving in to me. like i said, i.... am like tat...

to my dearest lao da:

sometimes, we cant be hoping for surprises all the time right? though it's sweet, but if he's busy for it den we shall be understanding right? well, i understand the feeling. as in the feeling of "different". anyway, no matter wat, you still got me okie? throw him aside and we go "kuang huan". oPps.. =X (oh my oh my.. i miss taka tat "cute cute".. ahaha.. =x) somehow, maybe that's the difference between guys and gals. we can forgo frenz bcoz of them but they cant forgo their frenz coz of us. is tat the difference? im not sure too. but lao da, IM HERE okie? juz a call away or a msg away.. cheers k.. cries no more.. (mainez wipes lao da's tears!) ni shi wo lao da.. wo hui yi zhi zai ni sheng bian de. =) hUggies... muAckz.. wo ai ni!!! yong yong yuan yuan!! ahaha.. =D

i realise im actually quite pathetic.. alright.. im talking senseless. -_- hao ke lian de wo.. still sick.. still busy with fyp.. still considering.. still thinking.. HEADACHE! why must i think so much? hmmm.. i wonder!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:26:00 AM

Monday, August 08, 2005

yoohoo.. jessica.. gal.. ling.. ade.. dun worry.. im fine le.. heex..

on the way of recovery.. weehee.. =)

tonight gotta rush for FYP again.. intend to re-do again.. coz all the tweens get messed up and bcoz of the position thingy.. it became quite messy.. nvm.. i will do my best..

been sick and get stuck at home for quite some days.. finally.. tdy went out for awhile..

went out to register for my basic. wah.. lyk FINALLY!! i finally register for it.. ahaha.. thx tat silly boy for bringing me to bbdc and register. compared to ssdc, bbdc is really very new lor... and the facilities is much better.. after the registration, we went west mall for breakfast/lunch/my dinner.. very full sia.. -_- and im still quite full now..

i realised that i had been spending a lot.. not on clothes. not on bags. not on any accessories. it's on daily needs. like shampoo. maggie mee. canned food. vegetables. and stuff. usually, mummy will be in charged of all this.. but why recently, i become the one buying? weird!

money tat i've saved is getter lesser.. mummy better give me some allowance.. sOb sOb.. =(

kk.. shall not blogged too much.. off for my fyp..

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:40:00 PM

Thursday, August 04, 2005

accused.

ppl who know me will know that i hate to be accused. and someone used to be so dear to me accused me just now.

duno to be angry or sad... maybe juz disappointed bah...

she's going to throw away my stuff i think... it's my stuff, though she know tat she dun hv the right, but i think she will............

i never wana delete anything away lor.. if i wana do so.. i will have deleted it long ago le lor.. muz wait until now meh? you were the one tat asked me to must well delete it and now you throwing temper to me? wat is this? i alwayz need to let you throw temper on? or i alwayz not right?

anyway, yeapx.. im too sick to think about it. you know tat im sick.. yet you accused me and scolded me.. NICE ONE! thanks ya..

i promised.. if tml din get any better, i will visit the doctor alright? dun worry abt me.. gal said im strong enough to take it.. ya... im learning. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -5:15:00 PM

SICK

im sick.. sOb sOb.. =(

maybe too much chocolate? maybe not enough sleep? maybe never have any fun? im being so guai recently.. never go out and play at all.. hAo kE lian!! -_-

silly boy having his exam.. tat's also why i din go out ya.. dun wan him to lose concentration. if i go out, he will get worry for me. somemore, im sick.. he will get more worried lor.. am i right? =x concentate on your studies k.. dun worry about me.. i will be fine de. If my illness get worse, i will go and see a doctor okie? tml is the last paper le, endure and study hard k?

gal is leading a good life now. a new start... nice one.. happy tat she is happy now.. =) i believe this is the lifestyle she wan, this is the person she wan.. =)

den wat's the lifestyle i wan? i just wana be happy.. izzit very hard to be happy? why make me cry? why make me pissed off? is this the way you love a person? i thought loving a person is seeing him/her happy, no matter wat, you will be happy for him/her too. tat's wat i did in the past. though dun bear to leave, yet i leave fox and seeing her happy with whoever, im content too. it's alright to miss, it's alright to love. what matter most is, love in the right way. are you really loving me in the right way? den why say harsh words to me? why hurt me with all your words? letting go of you is the best way out for both of us. you would not be miserable anymore. you dun have to tolerate my princess-like character anymore. im no longer uRz. you are no longer mine. i start to dun understand you.. and pls dun assume tat you understand me. everyone has their reason behind everything they do. you have your reason and i have my reason too. you once told me tat no matter wat happened, you will alwayz be my baby, alwayz be there for me and we will be good frenz de. but izzit just a lie? or you are breaking all the words you said? anyway, do watever you wan ya. i have no right to tell you wat is right or wrong. i would not hate you but if you wan, you can just continue to hate me. you have your rights. im still here as a frenz, as ur ex, alwayz here.

feeling much better le.. after talking to gal yest and realised a lot of thing. though i felt tat it's very not right, but i guess it's simply bcoz of love bah.. loving a person too much can be scary at times. you will never know what he/she will do or say. everyone has eyes to see. i admit im selfish. but i also gotta say tat i din let anyone down. is just up to them to decide in believing or not.

well, sick!!! running nose and cough.. think im getting fever soon le... going home after school for a good rest ya.. buay tahan.. ~tired!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:33:00 PM

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

PISSED! ANGRY

im so angry with myself.. so angry with my lappy..!!!! ARGH!! wat a waste of my time!

im doing my fyp.. i forgot to save.. and my lappy suddenly HANGED!! and it auto shut down!!! WAH!! I GOTTA START ALL OVER AGAIN??!!!!!!!! ARGH!!! PISSED OFF!!

look at the time.. im rushing already yet my lappy was being BAD TO ME!!! HMPFFF!!!

tat silly boy fell asleep le i think.. hmMmm... nvm.. he got exam tml.. shall let him sleep early den.. if not, he had been accompany me with my fyp till very late recently le.. -_- i think im alwayz disturbing him...

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:49:00 AM

Monday, August 01, 2005

just finish listening to yin yue ri ji..

jessica keep asking me izzit i write in de? NO.. NOT ME! i would not want it to end this way.. =x

why xiao wei choose to end it like this? friendship is better ma?

i never think too much.. just tat.. it's so qiao.. =)

im content tat i have someone who love me so much....

Indeed, it's quite a long time.. 7 years... i wonder how tat silly boy survive.. he said tat loving me seems to be part of his life le for these past 7 years....

i know, he did a lot of silly things just to find out about my life.. how am i? but den, he never had the courage to message or call me or even email me... -_-

i think im going to participate in yin yue ri ji 3rd CD competition ya.. with my chinese standard.. hMmm.. i think i can make it ya.. ahaha.. =x other than that, though my story might be lame, silly, stupid and complicated... but i still hope they will choose it ya... trying to finish it before the date due. well.... im still thinking of the ending... will it be a happy ending or sad ending?

i thought of some of the endings... let's vote than..
[1] the gal died due to accident.
[2] the gal and boy get together.
[3] the gal choose to leave.
[4] the boy choose to give up.
[5] the gal force to leave as she is dying due to some illness.

ahaha.. sound so dramatic.. oh my.. ahaha... what am i thinking....?? duh~ hopefully, it will be a happy ending bah..

editing the video clips now.. im so sian.. resting in the middle of editing.. heex...

fOx called... was worried about her upcoming case.. oh my... she ar.... haiz... dun wish to nag le.. hopefully she will learn from her mistaken bah.. =)

flu and cough seems to worsen.. cough turn into sore throat.. hmmMm.. throat starts to feel dry and pain... need some sore throat sweet.. heex.. getting it later den. =)

i need to buck up on fyp le... been slacking... NOW CANNOT SLACK LE!!! -_- muz pia...!!!

i din mention about project superstar before ar? pls support my superstar. They are Derick and Kelly!! THEY ARE THE BEST. simply like their voice.. unique and it touched me whenever they sing.

celebrated ah gong bday on saturday. meet u with my cousins. im feeling "old". ying jie jie wasnt able to rush back coz she is working. i see all my younger cousins.. cant blame me to feel that im OLD man.. they are either very young or growing up into a teenager.. and i felt so adult!! -_- this gathering is fun of coz.. took a lot of pictures as usual.. heex.. just love them lots... muAckz!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:45:00 AM

Thursday, July 28, 2005

as i said... JAVA SUX.. i hate java!! sOb soB!!

lao da is having her TP today.. oh my... jia you jia you!! weehee....!!

I feel that if i continue to spend.. continue to buy.. continue to eat good nice stuff.. i going to eat grass soon.. how how how?? -_-

daddy had been complaining about me recently.. he keep saying i nv call him wen i get home.. ahaha.. silly dad of mine.. juz funny sia...

im falling in love with tat jacket i saw... but i cant buy... pls.. dun temp me anymore!! i gonna cry soon.. my mei says she will get it for me as my bday present.. but it's still months AWAY!! by den.. i dun tink still have my size and stuff le lor... HOW SAD!!

bOring in sch sia... craving for pool.. i wana trash tat ang mei mei.. she is getting too pro.. i wana trash her.. hmpf..

feeling a little hungry now.... yum yum.. wat to eat later.....?? canteen food made me turn off!!! how i wish i have a BIG BREAKFAST now... i wana mac!! i dun wan canteen food anymore!!

I think I am mad... I begin to fall.. Begin to feel the jealousy.. Begin to care.. Begin to bother.. Begin to be angry.. Begin to throw temper.. Begin to give in.. Begin to awaits for sms till I gone mad.. Begin to.... OH MY.... I am mad!!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:45:00 AM

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

i............................

felt sad out of the sudden.. maybe coz of my darling mei bah... see her lyk so xin ku.. im xin ku for her too.. =(

but anyway.. she has to handle it herself.. coz no one can help other den herself.. =) jia you!!

why would guys lyk to control their gf?

why would guys bother about their gf's friend?

why would guys stop us from making new friends?

why would guys bother?

I HATE IT.. hate ppl to control.. totally lyk no freedom... totally not myself anymore.. as if i will be suffocating lor... i dun lyk this kind of feeling... i feel for ling.. oh my~~ silly gal is damn sad now i tink... haiz...

enjoy dinner with her... but we din get to enjoy shopping.. coz her dearest bf wana take her away from me.... and yesh.. he took her away.. IM SO SAD!!

total moodless now.. just very sian bah... hmmm...

sch tml.. oh my.. JAVA!! sux.. i dun lyk java.. poor jessica... i gotta depend on her again.. ahaha.. =x

someone mention tat... he would not have such bad taste to fall for me... he said it's kidding.. but den... it sound so true... wah... as in.. wat he said in the past is a lie? -_- NO COMMENT... i admit i was kind of pissed.. but den.. nvm la.. i admit the fact tat ppl have bad taste if they fall for me!

i made tat silly boy worried for me.. im sorry.. =) im fine now le.. really.. thx for being there k.. sorry for showing you my black face.. sorry for showing you my retarded temper.. sorry for making you think too much.... im fine le... really..

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:51:00 PM

Thursday, July 21, 2005

look at the time now.. duh~ im still awake...

doing my fyp.. im looking for pictures for my animation.. hMmm.. din realise tat it's tat late le..

oh my.. i got test in the morning... -_-

my phone is silent.. tat's why i wasnt disturb by any phone call or messages... and it oso made me din realise the time!!

im still quite awake.. but everyone is sleeping le.. -_-

went out with my dearest darling mei today.. i think we enjoyed ourselves.. =)) bring her go have a big feast at cine.. and wanted to get her something.. but she doesnt have anything in mind at the moment.. well, shall wait for her bday den.. wonder how is she going to celebrate it.. i told my mum tat i will be bringing her to watch ndp.. HAPPY?? ahaha..

actually.. i spent alot today.. at the rate of spending, i also start to wonder shld i continue to work... partly, with the pay, i can buy watever i wan.. with the pay, i dun hv to save here and ther.. but i'll be quite tired.. so any suggestion? shld i work again?? haiz...

baby waited for my call until she fall asleep le... oPps... =x

and tat silly panda.. waited for me to slp until he fall asleep too le...

ahaha.. everyone is tired.. except me?? nah.. im tired too.. but i have uncomplete stuff to do.. so well.. i shall continue doing it bah..

duh~ firstly, i have to study for my test...... =))

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:42:00 AM

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:57:00 AM

Guys better don't let Gals down worz

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:48:00 AM

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

每个人都有过去。

必须要解脱从前，

才能去到未来。

我在寻找未来。。

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:34:00 AM

Monday, July 18, 2005

disappointment and hurt.....

i quarrelled with my sister.. how stupid can tat be?

duh~ the reason behind is much more stupid..

she thinks she is so so so busy and im not...

she thinks she is the only one tat got other things to do and im not..

she thinks she is always so right...

she thinks she is the biggest in the house..

as if NO ONE CAN GO AGAINST HER!!

words from her mouth hurt so much to me...

i brought her out on her bday to celebrate even though it cost quite a sum of money. My mindset is as long as she is happy den im alright with it.

i stayed up in the night helping her packed her bookshelf without complaining tired or wat.

she messed up my room, i tidied up.

she inviting friends over, i lend her my room.

when she cried over dad and mum, i help her fight back..

duh~ im not requesting for anything in return...

hello~~ im ur sister... where's that respect??

ALL I NOE IS... im not gonna bother anymore...

remember wat you said and dun regret...

you will never noe how hurt your words can be when no one ever talk back to you lyk tat!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:43:00 PM

busy capturing the clips from the tapes again.. they are editing.. and no one doing the clips.. so i have to do it and end up.. no time for editing my second cut.. =(

gal and lao da is being bad.. they splash water on me.. and left me all alone in the toilet...... im left alone there with half of my jacket wet.... -__- the toilet is errie... and they left me all alone there... im scared lor.. yet WHERE ARE THEY? sob sob sob sob sob!! hmpf....

lesson was boring... chris is being naggy.. he keep repeating his word again and again.. duno why he is so... eh.... fussy today?? oh my.. is tat the word to use? -_-

i made tat silly boy waited for me at my school carpark for 1 hr++.. =X opps.. im sorry.. but my teacher is weird today.. he dun let me off early... -_-

i guess he muz be very happy.. coz he finally can fetch me home le.. and im home damn early now... ahaha.. mummy was shocked to see me at home at this time.. ahaha..

he bought me kinder bueno.. he noe i need it soon.. ahaha.. and the silly boy bought 5 packets lor.. i think he's trying to make me fatter so tat nobody wans me... =((

but well.. i still appreciate everything he did... though he is really silly in some.. or i shld say MANY WAYS.. but i understand why is he so silly... [i bet he dun understand why im saying.. =x] ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -5:41:00 PM

Sunday, July 17, 2005

am i wrong?

i seems to be the source of heartache....

i seems to be hurting those who love me lots..

towards my ex... i hurt them all...

towards those who love me before... i hurt them too...

i even hurt those tat are still loving me...

i made them confuse..

i made them sad..

maybe in the first place, they shld not even fall for a gal lyk me..

wat am i?

juz a gal anyone can found along the streets..

sometimes.. i dun even noe wat i wan...

so wat rights do i have to even decide on anything?

if they stay, they will be miserable..

maybe.. they shld go??

im capable of being alone................................

ANGEL_scribbled * -5:05:00 AM

Thursday, July 14, 2005

specially for Jessica, my dearest guan yin ma...

dun feel ~~FAT, ROUND, UGLY and LOW MORALE~~!! wen you feel so, do look at me too!! hmpf!!

everyone has each other's special point and side. no one is forever beautiful or slim. imagine, when we grow older.. as in at the age of 60+? i might look so so so FAT.. so so so ROUND? this are things that we cant predict isnt it?

so what there a need to envy others?

think in another way round, some gals are pretty, intelligent, slim and attractive, but if they nv meet with a guy tat will love the gal bcoz of her inner instead love the gal for her outer, and so wat's the point right?

i have a lot of frenz who are pretty and attractive, yet their whole love life is ruin coz guys will get tired of the pretty face one day and realise tat she doesnt suit him.. if not, pretty gal will alwayz be very silly.. waiting for the guy tat dun love or cherish them..

so what so nice being pretty? or slim? i used to ask myself.. why i wan it so much to slim down? why i wan it so much not to be fat? i tried means and way to go and diet.. tried to vomit out watever i eat.. tried to skip meals to go on diet.. tried to drink water for the day only.. tired so hard not to eat my fav. chocolate.. tried not to eat tibits.. and i begin to lose interest in life.. coz i have been missing all my fav. in life..

have i ever mention, i love chocolate so much? have i ever mention i actually love eating supper? have i ever mention i love sweet stuff? have i ever mention i love pringles so much? nah~ all coz im afraid of being fat...

mummy just scolded me for skipping my meals and not eating in time.. she's afraid tat i'll get gastric pain. it's the genetic inheritance, i have gastric problem too. therefore, i actually need to eat my meals in time. if one day, my gastric really cannot take it, i will juz fall into great pain.. HOW HORRIBLE!! i dun wan.. so no more diet for me.. i will juz eat watever i wan le.. heex.. =))

so jessica.. dun think too much alright... bear in mind tat NO MATTER HOW YOU CHANGE AND BECOME in appearance, it's juz the outer only.. wat matter most is your inner. and im glad tat ur dear appreciate it. =)) therefore, dun care so much alright? healthy lifestyle is the best!!

same goes to gal.. pls dun ever say tat you are fat alright... ahem.. coz you aint!!! -_-

reflect from jessica's post.. i also realise tat I'd like to go back to the past for certain things but stay in the present for some things because some things are better back in the past..

good friends are together because they have certain things in common? izzit true? my defination of good friends is.. someone who really understand me. support me in watever i do. correct me wen im wrong.

somehow.. i oso start to feel that im no longer the me from the past till now.. maybe tat the stage called "grown up" bah~

it's true tat.. everyone.. everywhere changes in any moment.. no one will stay at itself for his/her whole life without changing..

watched "My Boyfriend Is Type B" just now.. i got the vcd.. it's a gift from Mr. Chris~~~tmas Boo. =X

really? it can be calculated whether are your blood type suitable for your gf/bf. HOW COOL!! shall find more information on tat aR? btw... i wonder wat's the conclusion of my blood type.. hMmmm..

Research:
According to Japanese researchers, certain personality traits correlate to specific blood types. What do YOU think?

TYPE O "HOT"

Population
Roughly 38% of the world is O +ve and 6% O -ve.

You want to be a leader, and when you see something you want, you keep striving until you achieve your goal. You are a trendsetter, loyal, passionate and self-confident. Your weaknesses include vanity, jealousy and a tendency to be too competitive.

Confident and Strong-Willed, Proud, Dedicated, Sociable, Energetic, Extroverted, Frank, Realist, Showy, Flighty, Generalist, Positive, Independent, Risk-Takers, Dislike taking orders, Insecure, Stubborn & Self-Centered.

Make friends easily and go with flow and grasp opportunity. Quick to start a project or chase an idea. Are good at organizing activities. May have short attention span, and expresses strong emotions. May quickly take opposite views that are deep but not always durable. Classic entrepreneurs and movers and shakers.
Express their emotions but can be swayed by other blood types. Have an intrinsic elegance. Sociable and showy. May be good at adapting to circumstances. Words come easily to them. Not self conscious and will frankly reveal inner feelings. Ambitious, but may have issues with detail. Like to be touch and be touched by others.

TYPE A "COOL"

Population

Roughly 34% of the world is A +ve and 6% A -ve.

You like harmony, peace and organization. You work well with others and are sensitive, patient and affectionate. Among your weaknesses are stubbornness and an inability to relax.

Obedient, Careful, Sympathetic, Self-Sacrificing, Polite, Honest, Loyal, Emotional, Introverted & Nervous.

Are reserved calm and even tempered. Sensitive to public opinion. May be Introverted, shy and nervous or ill at ease with others. May be Pessimistic. Value relationships and are loyal. Hesitant to change. Nature lovers and dislike crowds - need a private place or secret hideaway. Can be indecisive. Good at team work and obey rules. Dislike to touch or be touched by others.

TYPE B "ACTIVE"

Population

Roughly 9% of the world is B +ve and 2% B -ve.

You're a rugged individualist who's straightforward and likes to do things your own way. Creative and flexible, you adapt easily to any situation. However, your insistence on being independent can sometimes go too far and become a weakness.

Cheerful, Optimistic, Active, Sensitive, Kind, Forgetful, unorganized, Noisy, Egocentric

Energetic and have the drive to reach towards goals. May be workaholics. Not the best team players and are individualistic. Do things at one's own pace. Strong personality adventurous. Likes to get one's own way. Are Sociable and enjoy entertaining. Like to touch or be touched by others.

TYPE AB "CARE-FREE"

Population

Roughly 4% of the world is AB +ve and 1% AB -ve.

Cool and controlled, you're generally well-liked and always put people at ease. You're a natural entertainer who's tactful and fair. But you're sometimes standoffish, blunt and have difficulty making decisions.

Social, Easy-going, Sympathetic, Diplomatic, Outgoing, Laid-back, Creative, Unpredictable, Artistic, Flexible, Moody and Brooding.

Blend of opposites. Shy with some and bold with some. Introvert and Extrovert. Unpredictable and may seem to have calm exterior. Strong creative strain. Good at spotting problems and skirting them. Like city environment. Get bored easily. Everything they do is compelling. Never take things for granted. Appear mysterious. Contribute harmoniously to society. Dislike to touch or be touched by others.

interesting right? NOW... guess my blood type.. ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:37:00 PM

how men ar..

wat a boring day.... java sux!!! i hate java!! -_-

fliming for the past few days.. TIRING!! trust me.. our talent acting skill improve ALOT ALOT!! weehee!! =)) she can enrol for "zui jia nu zu jiao" sia.. and i...... well... i enrol for "zui jia nu gui"!! ahaha... =X

had a short celebration at my place after fliming.. it's baby's bday.. and we bought a cake to surprise her.. mummy and daddy joined in the fun too.. well, they noe each other ma.. my daddy is so comical.. he was the one tat took out the cake.. and ask us to switch off the lights.. so funny!! and everyone just sing her bday song again.. both english and chinese version.. i tink she enjoyed herself ar? but i tink she will be kind of surprise instead! ahaha.. i tink i look fat in the pic.. OH MY~!! diet diet!!

the last day of fliming, we went out for supper. go ALL the way to chinatown for our porridge.. actually.. i dun lyk to eat "pi dan" but gal only eat tat.. and in order to force her at least eat a bit.. i share with her lor.. so.. ended up.. i din eat the "pi dan". =X

i think there's something wrong with tat guai pei pei!! for no reason, lyk to disturb me so much..!! hmpf.. just so suay.. i alwayz get to sit beside him whenever we are having meals together.. he lyk to "qiang tou pok" with me!! hmpf.. -_- lao da.. pls asked him to behave himself!! =P *bleahx

after supper.. went ALL the way to marine and play arcade.. ahaha.. it's just toooo early to go home.. oPps.. =x

thought it's my off day on wed, but i kind of wake up early still.. or shld i say, i dun have enough slp bah..

went out to meet tat 7 years old silly panda.. catch a movie with him before going off to meet my frenz.. kinda feeling bad coz i left him all alone with nth to do and he din wana go home.. in the end, he found his frenz.. so he went out with them.. =))

meet gal at kBOX.. she is so blur lor.. went for RTT WITHOUT HER WALLET!! waste the trip there. waste the $6. waste the time.. AIYO!! blur gal...

she ordered a whiskey on the rock. WAH~ power.. the first cup only, and she is getting high.. followed by the second cup, she is high le.. anyhow shout and dance le.. smoke smoke smoke.. she keep smoking lyk a smoke machine!! *argh!! angry!! she is a evil gal.. she is a naughty gal.. hmpf!! after kBox.. she still wana drink lor.. in order not to let her eat grass for the rest of the week, kriz brought her home to drink.. wat the..!! she really wana drink until she gone siao sia!!

sch sux a big time today.. im so bored! java is so boring.. sObz.. no more java pls!! home sweet home.. i wana go home!! =((

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:25:00 PM

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

i used to put down everything i do whenever *she needs me.

i used to push away all other gathering whenever *she wanted to meet me.

now that *she got her own company of frenz, i thought i should not disturb her too much?

i din wana drifted apart from *her. coz i still cherish the sister-ship so much. i tried to balance with my dearest and *her. i intro them to know each other, hoping we can get along well and can go out together.

i felt the same when she spent more time with her cliques. wen i wana meet her, the timing is alwayz just so not right.. either she's in school or out with her frenz.. hMmm.. i have bad sense of timing right?

i do feel upset too.. and moodless.. i thought *she will be the one understanding me. i dun wish to neglect both side. therefore, i tried to entertain all.. but somehow *she still feel neglected..

i seldom meet up with *her coz of my busy sch life, project and stuff.. and she seldom have time for me due to her exam, sch and stuff..

i guess, the timing is just not right bah.. -_-

DARLING LING!! listen up alright? ahem.. im not neglecting or forget about you k.. i miss you as much.. love you as much.. and understand tat how busy is our year 3 life!! im really trying my best to meet up and crap together.. somehow maybe in thinking wise.. we changed in mindset. therefore, the feeling is different.. we shall create a new feeling alright? as in.. the mature kind? oh my.. i felt tat im so old.. =x pls... dun anyhow think ya.. and dun be sad or moodless... muackz muackz.. you are still my darling mei.. you are still my dearest and first priority.. weehee!! =))

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:37:00 PM

when stress meets pressure

im bored.. it's now in the middle of lesson.. and im blogging.. how bored can i be.. -_- im starting to lose interest in studies.. and i have been neglecting fyp.. oh my.. i still got alot to do lor.. no time no time.. better buck up!!

a story i came arcoss from the email..

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it.

After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade

The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep.

She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year

The day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step! I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know
why.

Graduation Day

A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later

Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know
that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral

Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read:

I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and
I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be
just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish
he would tell me he loved me!

I wish I did too... I thought to my self, and I cried.

I Love You..

how sweet. how sad. both are deeply in love yet they are just too shy to make the first move. oh well.. in real life, there's really such ppl who miss their chance being together.. eh.... i think im crapping...

im starting to fall... falling apart.. falling sick.. im so weak.. i noe!! tired tired tired.. we need to rush fyp.. need to rush fliming.. need to rush video editing.. need to rush rush rush!! just simply one word.. STRESS!!

apart from tat.. i felt pressure somewher around me too.. dun push me too hard... if not, i will juz run away...........

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:46:00 AM

gal and i pon sch coz we wana "kuang huan"!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:15:00 AM

lao san, lao da and lao er[me!]

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:14:00 AM

gal and i slacking at TCC

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:13:00 AM

ASh bite chris on 4th July..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:12:00 AM

my nice nails after $25 manicure.. now is GONE~

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:11:00 AM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! - lao gong & baby

we reshoot all the scene for indoor.. firstly.. the one we took previously is not in the right angle.. secondly.. shadow problems.. thirdly.. not perfect and nice enough!!

editing the video in lab today.. tiring yet im glad to learn something new.. it can be kind of interesting.. heex.. i did most of the part till jessica, gal and lao da got nth to do.. oPPs.. =x

Celebrated baby's bday on sat.. at Chocolate Bar.. and i swear.. i din enjoy at all..!! im really glad tat gal, lao da and darling mei turned up.. if not.. i will be so extra i tink.. lao da left around 1+ for her movie.. but well... we understand.. so lao da.. pls dun be UNHAPPY anymore alright? =)) smilez smilez.. i muAckz you!! *force kiss!! baby was drunk.. very drunk tat day.. -_- i told you all.. she cant drink le ma... ahem!! =x

gal hurt me so much sia... really qi pian my gan qing.. i so wanted her to quit.. but she din.. maybe it's kind of tough.. but hopefully she will quit ya.. coz i dun wan her to regret in future.. some more.. it's ex to smoke.. ahem!! if you wana eat grass.. continue to smoke k..!! hmpf.. but if you continue, i will be sad.. i will throw temper.. i will be angry.. AHEM!! i inform you first.. and LAO DA.. pls dun be affected by lao san.. SHE IS QUITING LE... i have confidence in her.. let's all jia you for her k?? =))

fliming today went off quite smoothly bah.. without meizhen and gal.. we got another helper.. who is my dearest naughtiest brother.. LIM WEI JIE!! jessica mention tat we got to include him in our credits.. ARE YOU SURE? i think he love to be the clapper board-er so much!! ahaha.. maybe we are trained le bah.. lao da never really NG anymore.. and trust me.. WE REALLY SAVE ALOT OF TIME!! ahaha.. no time for joke.. JUST WORK.. how serious we 3 gals are.. weehee!! gal joined us at the later part.. =)

i tink i sacrifice alot.. i wasted my $25 manicure.. and repolish my nails with black and white colour.. NO CHOICE.. im the GHOST!! HOW SAD!! who is going to sponsor me $25 to do another manicure again?? SOB SOB SOB!! other den my nails.. i need to look ugly.. coz ghost aint pretty.. and i need to wear in ALL WHITE.. which i super hate myself in ALL WHITE.. it makes me look so so so so SO FAT!! =(

after fliming.. as usual.. jessica had to go home and we all waited for alan to fetch lao da.. i super feel lyk eating porridge.. so we all set off for my porridge.. trust me.. IM SUPER FULL NOW!! *burps.. =x

tml have to continue shooting again.. hopefully everything can be done by tml.. this i pray hard to whichever god that can fufill my wish!! *pray hard hard!!

p.s i gotta wish the 2 impt person in my life a super duper BIG BIG BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

lao gong - you are 20 this year le.. GROW UP ya.. be more mature.. be strong.. stay positive.. it's not the end of the world.. alwayz remember tat im just a phone call away k.. thx for giving in to me and teng me.. for anything.. any problem.. im alwayz HERE k!! *waves waves

baby - you are oso 20 ya.. oso need to grow up le.. in terms of thinking anf character wise.. we are really very different.. but anyway.. i wana thx you for alwayz being there for me.. giving in to me.. and tolerating my super nasty temper.. i noe to you.. im just lyk a princess with no respect to others.. but duh~ im trying not to be prncess anymore ya.. maybe just tat.. i dun wish to grow up bah.. lastly.. thx for loving me with no condition.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:33:00 AM

Monday, July 11, 2005

out of the sudden.. i duno wat to blog...

my mind is blank now..

thinking of wat shld i do..

wat im suppose to do..

im not feeling moody...

just feeling a bit blank...

a bit lost......

maybe it's time to reflect again.......

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:40:00 AM

Thursday, July 07, 2005

..........................

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:29:00 AM

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

FYP

i stayed at home to do my fyp.. i need to rush.. i need to jia you le... been neglecting fyp ever since "something" happened.. jessica shld noe and will understand bah.. im sorry.. i will work harder alright. =))

i feel so guilty.. coz someone skipped school bcoz of me.. =( he doesnt wana listen to me... he is being very naughty.. NO NEXT TIME alright? PROMISE? i can be naughty.. but not you.. later your mum come and scold me sia.. =x i think.. im a bad influence sia.. haiz...

but den.. we did enjoyed our day ya.. went to catch a movie at cine.. the show is nice.. and juz so "qiao"... the relationship between the couple in the show took 7 years to have some result... hMmmm.... 7 years...?? ahaha.. im thinking too much... -_-

as usual... pool again.. pool became part of our life le sia.. =x but a lot of fun while playing la... hmmm.. ahaha.. i duno how to state it out.. juz fun bah.. ahaha..

small boy is "disappointed", "angry" or watsoever over me ride on other's bike... he sound aigitated.. yet he said NO.. he.... mind aR? i got no comment.. he din say anything.. but ya... other den "hmpf" and "it's your life"!! he once promise tat i will be the first gal to ride on his bike.. will he break tat promise? anyway.. it doesnt matter.. coz "it's HIS life"!!

shall start on my fyp le.... blog later den....... =))

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:45:00 PM

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

im naughty..

been skipping school this few days...

i admit im naughty... im a bad student... i mixed with "bad friend".. i had "bad influence" from them!! ahaha.. =x OPPS...

nah.. gal been feeling down recently.. accompany her is wat i can do... =)) am glad tat she is feel "okie" for the time being.. hopefully.. she will be okie for the "rest" being!! ahaha.. oh my.. how broken english..

well.. i think i really "enjoyed" this few days.. though gal is not really "in the mood" but, we still did enjoy hor? but den... WE MISS LAO DA BADLY!! -_- SOB!! lao da been "ignoring" us for a few days.. she dun love us anymore!! -_- HOW SAD!!

cannot cannot... i need to buck up on studies le.. NO MORE SKIPPING OF SCH HOR.. gal!!! tat silly panda is suppose to fetch me today.. but he can be tat silly till he duno how to come orchard frm his place.. -_- therefore, i still nv get the chance to get a ride from him.. i shall direct him and teach him how to go den.. ahaha.. went clementi for pool and arcade.. meiyun is addicted to daytona!! she wana drive lyk how she play.. =X ahaha.. but end up, clementi dun have daytona.. sadded!! so we ended up playing stupid games tat is avaliable.. ahaha..

the outing is just playing pool i tink... we almost spent all our time on the pool table.. execpt the time at kbox.. ahaha..

gal is feeling better after kbox right? i believe she is strong enough to overcome everything!! duh~ she is not lyk me.. so soft hearted.. haiz.. i admit.. i very "ruan".. ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:51:00 AM

Monday, July 04, 2005

for my darling gal..

specially dun go to work to pei gal.. hope somehow she will feel better... =))

pei her make her nails at taka yest.. den after tat pei her go expo watch car show.. my very first time riding on bike for quite some distance.. i din shout from orchard to expo OKIE.. lao da!! ahem.. but it's true tat im not scared anymore.. heex...

gal ar.. as you said... when it's time to let go.. you will have to let go.. since someone dun cherish you.. why even bother about him?

i believe you will be strong enough to carry on..

i will stick with you no matter what k..

you will be brave to face all difficulties..

you will grow up and be stronger..

you will find your love one soon..

you will not tear anymore..

i will alwayz be here... =))

i might not find the right word to console you.. i might not find the right thing to entertain you.. i might not make you VERY happy.. but den.. i still really pray tat you will cheer up and be the happy-go-lucky you again...

alwayz remember tat im just beside you.. anytime.. anywhere.. okie??

you are not alone.. you wun be lonely coz im HERE!!

you still got me to love you.. still got me to teng you.. alright?

dun tink too much k... =))

you wun let me down de right? you promise to cheer up alright?

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:10:00 AM

im craving..

i begin to crave for chocolate.. o h m y o h m y.... kinder bueno!! -_-

i just realise... im can be so unreasonable at times..

i would say... im a very playful gal.. i can play with NO LIMIT.. throw temper as if everyone owe me something.. i goes against my parent and they got nth to say about me.. daddy alwayz give in to me.. tat's make me the princess at home.. to love me, firstly, gotta accept my unreasonable side.. secondly. tolerate my temper.. thirdly, able to give in to me NO MATTER wat.. fourthly, love me for who i am.. dun change me into who you want me to be!

i admit.. im spolit child.. my dad, my mum, my ex, my frenz... they give in to me too much!! ahaha.. =x

p.s -->> i dun wish to regret.. i dun wish to miss something tat i missed in the past.. i dont want to "try out".. as if i step into a relationship.. it gonna be a long term relationship!!

and im sure... i dun just wana try out..................

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:57:00 AM

Friday, July 01, 2005

Missing Someone

Missing someone is a terrible but at the same time, sweet feeling.
You will be sitting around wondering if you meant anything to him/her.
Thinking if he/she ever cares about you.
Rushing to the phone once it rings hoping that it's him/her.

Looking out of the window hoping that he/she will surprise you by appearing downstairs.
Sitting in front of the television but thinking of him/her,
missing the final episode of your favourite show.
Laying on your bed, thinking of the last time you were out together.
Thinking of how nice it will be to sit under the stars again,
talking about everything, your dreams, plans, future.
Logging on to the internet hoping to see him/her online.
When you realise that he/she isn't online and did not return your call,
you will start worrying if he/she is okay.

Missing someone is a way of growing up i guess.
It exposes you to loneliness.
It teaches you how to cope with being lonely and let you know that there is actually a feeling known as emptiness.

Sometimes it feels good to miss someone.
You know that you really care and you indulge in the feeling of loving/caring for him/her.

But missing someone and not knowing if he/she is feeling the same is terrible.
You feel as if you are being left alone.
So if you miss someone, tell him/her and let them know.
At the same time, ask if they miss you.
Don't let the feeling of missing someone become jealousy or paranoia.
If you are the one being missed and you know it, let the other party know.
If you miss him/her too, tell them.
Don't let them wait.

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:30:00 AM

sch just sux!!

attending lesson just make me super tireD!! -_-

anyway, went out for dinner with the gals and guai pei pei. went lucky for our fav. again!! heex.. =D yummy.. the food is juz so nice!!

guai pei pei's frenz came to meet them. feeling a bit weird.. ahaha.. coz we duno them ma.. heex..
suppose to go home after tat.. but was feeling so sian.. so went to tcc cafe and chit chat. recently, gal and i just love to rot at cafe!! for some reason, we just wana sit down and talk ya.. though without lao da.. feeling a bit empty.. but we understand tat she need to pei her darling.. heex.. =))

i would say.. TCC cafe is a nice place to rot ya. the sofa sit is nice.. and the atmosphere is good. GREAT PLACE to rot with frenz.. but will be nicer if there's a big group of frenz ya.. coz 2 person just make the space so empty.. oh~ we so miss lao da!! we got a 3 person seats.. it's so suitable for the 3 of us!! it seems lyk it is fixed just for US!! ahaha.. =x

went for pool session again.. something "interesting" i noticed!! nowadays, gals lyk to wear low cut and show half of the breast/bra. HOW about the guys?? i was wondering.. finally i found an answer today!! GUYS lyk to show out their boxer!! i saw a guy.. wear a simple tee and a berm. but his berm is half way hanging on his butt, and he showed half of his boxeR!! apart from tat, i can conclude tat he is wearing some boxer which is not his size at all.. coz there's alot of cloth hanging on top of his berm.. whenever he bend down and shoot the ball, it just turn me OFF as i can see almost the whole boxer plus his berm below.. just lyk wearing 3 layers lor.. his tee, boxer den his berm!! TURN OFF RIGHT? i din wana notice.. but i find it super funny..!! so i juz keep making fun!! ahaha.. =x

a gentle remainder.. guys.. boxer dun have to wear until so HIGH!! nowadays, guys have g-string too!! wear the correct one to suit ur pant and dressing pls.. if not, it will juz turn gals OFF!! im SERIOUS!! ahaha.. =x

okie.. for the paragraph above is juz my personal opinion. some gals might think it is SO MAN when guy show out their boxer!! =x

oh ya.. talking about this, how can i not mention about that guy i saw in sch!! firstly.. i saw him in the canteen, wearing a tight fit sleeveless with a jacket over.. at first, i commented, "wah, super hate guys with no figure yet wana wear tight fit!!". Later, i saw him with his jacket off.. which means, i saw his "fit body" with his tight fit sleeveless!! first reaction, "SO MAN!!!" tUrn off man!!! i juz mention, i cannot tahan guys with no figure wearing tight fit and next he took off his jacket!! -_- nowadays.. guys just duno how to wear.. ahaha.. =x

imagine a guy tat is super FIT.. and i mean very super FIT.. and he is kind of close to you, as in your close frenz but just suddenly, he sai-na to you?? how will you react?? i tink i will freak out STRAIGHT AWAY!!!!

k.. im crapping.. but juz thought of it.. therefore blog it down..

i had a sux and boring sch day.. but i had a fun outing with gal and lao da!! =)) overall, enjoyed!!

will be meeting my dearest darling mei tml.. oh my, miss her LOTS!! hopefully, it will be a pleasant outing.. as in, no unhappy event.. =x LET'S PRAY HARD!! i juz miss her lots.. and i wish for a happy time together.. heex..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:20:00 AM

Thursday, June 30, 2005

BORING

i swear.. it is super boring today.. hMmmm

wanted to skip sch in the early morning.. coz we are just so sian.. coz.. it is JAVA!!

i really hate java la.. cant blame me for skipping sch..

but due to the fact tat, im afraid of my dearest guan yin ma.. who is jessica.. i decided not to go off.. partly oso coz of my grade la.. ahaha.. =x i scared jessica scold sia!! sOb! she is fierce!!

slack for awhile.. den continue with java.. finally get to solve a bit of it ya..

went over to esso for some refreshment.. lao da keep tempting me to get chocolate.. but can say im subborn la... I DIN EAT ANY k... juz so not tempted!! =P

she's mad after the esso trip!! becoming crazy and entertained us with her crap and siao-ness!! ahaha...

i got so many other pic to upload still.. hmmmm.. shall i share it with ALL, lao da?? ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:13:00 PM

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

NO MORE CHOCOLATE

i wana be the perfect gal.. the ideal gal in my mind.

if there's a chance to do plastic surgery, i will just ask them to do the "suck out my fats"!! i swear.. i wana slim down. NO MORE CHOCOLATE for 6 months!! I SWEAR!! my dearest gals and friends, pls STOP me frm eating it!!

skipped sch tdy.. coz the problem statement is hard and we just very moodless.. lao da din go with us... hmMmm.. she needs her grade ya... -_-

gal and i went down town for lunch. bring her to the coffee club at taka. quite a nice place to sit down and tok cork ya... recently, we keep finding place to chit chat. juz as if there's a lot to say.. but well, for the content, we understand wat each other mean can le..

meet up with panda in the afternoon.. have a pleasant outing rite? though it ended early.. coz im too tired.. and plus, we forgot to take photo again.. ahaha..

im really tired now.. juz damn tired.. shall turn in damn early today!! wahaha.. nitezz!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:36:00 AM

we are "the reflection"! =))

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:23:00 AM

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

gal: i pray for my dearest charmaine tat she will find her love and oso love her de very soon... n she will not cry and b brave to face all difficulties... as i will be a her side to go through this wif her... ah-men!

thankz gal.. for encouraging.. wo hui hen yong gan de. =))

i need to be brave?

i need to grow up?

i need to be stronger?

tears NO MORE!!

i will become a brand new me... for everything i do, no matter wat, i noe i will alwayz have my friends around. EXAMPLE; ling, gal and vAnz.. =))

thanks for being there...

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:08:00 AM

Love is so unpredicable... At times when we have to let go, we need to let go...

Dun be too persistent and hang on there too long... as this may hurt each other more...

Crying is part of our life, it helps us to grow stronger and firmer in our stand...

When you finish crying, tomorrow will be a brand new start...

Im suppose to feel "not good", but duh~ i cant be showing out to everyone. i just shut up and only close one know... -_- presentation just sux today. the team is super naggy... anf tok so much.. juz buay tahan.. presentation suppose to end at 1, in the end drag till 3+..

went lucky for lunch and went to get my 3/4.. not tat bad... it suppose to be baby get it for me.. but... haiz.. nvm...

went over to cine for bubble tea coz both of them wana drink. pool session after drinks and crap at food court. lao da received guai pei pei's call and leave us le... ta bu yao wo men le...

played pool for awhile before we get sian... walked down to hmv while thinking of where to go. gal and i juz wana do stupid thing lor.. wat a waste of money.. but yet, we just feel lyk doing so lor.. was thinking of where to go~~("i suddenly voiced out, coffee shop, have everything!!")

since im in bad mood, i believe taking photo will make me feel better... and i took some pictures with gal at hmv. had fun duh~ [you cant expect me to cry upon taking pic right?] the outcome of the pictures is NICE! going to scan out tml..

(baby) waited for me outside the neoprint shop. she bought a mp3 for me! i eager to return her the money.. but she din wan.. -_- im sorry. i noe i have hurt you. but we just need to grow up bah.. i still care as much for you.. im still here.. im not dead yet.. please dun be upset anymore..

Knowing tat im not in very good mood, gal accompany me go drink.. went to C.A.N cafe for a jug.. the drink and atmosphere there is not bad.. i lyk it, tat's why i suggested to go there. =)) we "gossip" a lot.. shared and talked about alot of things.. den realise actually, we have alot of things in common.. as in the past, relationships, sisters, friends and ex... at least, we understand how each other feel. C.A.N cafe is nice.. we shall bring lao da to go there.. slack and tok more crap!!

thankz gal... for being there wen i needed someone so much.. i will stay strong. i will continue to grow up. i will be brave as i noe you will alwayz be there for me.. =) things tat really do make sense, i will try hard to do it.. but hopefully, i will be hard hearted enough bah..

ps. when will you ever understand how i feel instead? when will you stop blaming on me? when will you stop saying hurting stuff to me? when will you... stop loving me? i dun wish to see you miserable.. neither do i wish to see you cry.. maybe without me, really will be better? we will still be good friend right? yin wei ai.. er li kai..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:03:00 AM

Friday, June 24, 2005

the act cute clan!! wahaha

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:48:00 AM

baby acting cute!! OMG~

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:47:00 AM

i love to cling to lao da lyk a kolar bear!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:46:00 AM

aiyoyo.. POSE KING!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:45:00 AM

our butt is sticked together!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:44:00 AM

i live with my kinder bueno! i cant live without it!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:42:00 AM

wat's with tat pose? ahaha.. bleahx

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:41:00 AM

yummy cake! [pei pei got very xing fu lOOK wor!!]

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:40:00 AM

kiss kiss lao da! OPPS.. =X

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:39:00 AM

our PRESENTss!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:38:00 AM

??????!

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:37:00 AM

lao da with her blueberry cake!! =))

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:36:00 AM

Upon viewing the flash, this is my thoughts.

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:33:00 AM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

i have not been blogging.. so decided to blog something before going to bed.

Firstly, LAO DA!! HAPPY BELATED BDAY! i did wish her.. but in my blog, it's consider a belated one.. but im not late in reality!! weehee!!

Secondly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HENRY!! im not late either!! =)

I have reasons behind for not blogging.. I am tied up with lots of events!!

Well.. shall mention about lao da's bday!! i can say, it's fun fUn FUN!! =)

went down to cine in the "middle of the night" to celebrate vAnz's bday.. she was with her frenz at party world before meeting us at cine.. happily di-siaoing her by poking her pipi.. oPps.. =x

din even have any slp, we went to the market for the bbq stuff.. bought a lot of food.. and it's super cheap coz we get it from baby's auntie. went home for some rest before heading down to chalet at east coast. everyone OVERSLEPT, including vanz. she is suppose to check in at 2pm and we all reach there around 4pm. get set up, get ready the food and stuff, baby and power ranger start the fire for bbq.. it really took them some time!! ahem.. well, bbq was fun. a lot of ppl came. mainly van and alan's relative, den friends. the chalet was quite a success ya. coz everyone did enjoy! =)

oh ya.. i was kind of surprise to see small boy there!! he called me so many time, yet i missed his call, but den, nvm.. he wun be angry or wat. ahaha.. he said, somehow im his saviour coz he is too bored there i think.. plus, i bet, there no chio one for him to bio and will make him stay in the chalet! ahaha.. he keep saying that we were lyk some couple, waiting for each other under a TREE!! "HOW ROMANTIC"? remind me of the oldies drama!! it's kind of lame yet he thought of something lyk this!! well, i dun even understand why will i start talking to him as lyk in the past? normally wen we see each other in sch, we will juz diam diam and walk pass each other. we used to tok ONLY on msn.. but just tat day, we tok to each other juz lyk how we used to tok in the past. SURPRISING rite? =x seriously, somehow wat he blogged actually made me think!! ahaha.. DUH~ i duno why and wat he wan to refrain himself to do, but hopefully, he will stay positive and be happy with his life too.. =) dun tink too much ya.. ppl lyk his ex wun piss me off..! ahem.. and i nv take anything for granted before. how can he make sure tat he will treat someone THE BEST? wat's the defination for it den? hmMm.. i wonder..

anyway, alot of pics to be uploaded soon!!

went back to sch for the mentoring session. was tired yet i still drag my feet to sch.. the sec sch student were "cute"! they are just too young to be "mature". OPPS. =x

i bought a lot of things for myself recently again. though i told myself not to spend anymore, yet, i just cant help it. oh my, i duno how to control. HOW SAD!!

i think enough of crapping.. actually, im not really in any good mood.

read ling's blog. i wonder who she's refering to. izzit me? i called her but guess she is aslp bah.. feeling kind of down too.. but den wat im saying now is wat i really mean. though we are so busy with our sch, classmates and life.. i still care as much for her. we wun become stranger neither will we wun tok to each other. really trying hard to arrange a time to meet up.. wonder wen will she be free.. shall call her later instead.. i tink i better stay positive.. thinking too much doesnt help at all.. -_- meanwhile, really hope she will take good care of herself and her bf will treat her well too.. i love her as much!! hUgz. muAckz. =))

http://ad3285.com/star/star01.html

alright.. this is not a very "new" flash. but i went to view it again, i really went to notice the words and meaning for the words.

it's so touching.. such guy is near to extinct. maybe there's no such guy anymore!! i dun really lyk the ending. i would prefer the gal and the guy to get together! i pursue perfect love. and as romantic as it can be.. i really hope the gal and guy can be together. i wonder will someone love me tat much in real life? i wonder again..

i tink im only good in making ppl sad and moody.. im sorry for making you think too much.. im alwayz the one bullying you. i seems to be alwayz the one who make you sad sad.. im sorry.. =( i noe you are sad over me, yet i din do anything. coz.. i duno wat shld i do.. wat can i do to make you not sad? wat can i do to make you happy? i have no idea at all.. i tink im so capable of making ppl sad.. sometimes.. im confuse too... but one thing for sure, i dun lyk to rush into anything. coz we will find ourselves regreting in the end. this is wat i collected from my friend's past relationship. i wun wana be lyk them. or lyk the past me....

well, shall not tink too much den.. studies is my piority now!! i need to concentrate on my FYP!! no time le.. jessica finishing le.. im still at the beginning!! how can? ahem!!

bed time... im tired.. trying to get some rest.. but somehow.... eh.... nvm...

i shall force myself to slp den..

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:13:00 AM

Thursday, June 16, 2005

true love requires no word.

"Love, an emotion so strong that you would give up everything. To just feel it once, to know that you are part of something special. To know that you can feel what love really is; to know, to feel, to love."

i read that from friendster.. one of my poly frenz get attached recently.. and i juz got to noe it la..

upon reading the blog of the gal.. i seems to see a reflection of my past..

fairytale do exists?

"Deep in my heart, I'm suffering, knowing that I've lost you. On the outside, I'm living, pretending that I've forgotten you."

"Every moment I spend by your side, I feel a stab within my heart ... as I come to realize that the tears that fall from my eyes are truly the blood from my broken heart."

that's what the gal wrote..

well.. i would say.. time heals.. though i took a much more longer time than her.. but it do heal.. the hurt, the pain.. will form into a scar.. wat remain is only the scar in my heart.

love is unfair.. yet you cant blame on anyone who break any promise. it take 2 hands to clap. whenever there's a problem in a relationship, both party should be responsible for it.

i believe in "netural respect" in a relationship.

If you dun have the basic respect for each other, how will a relationship last?

If you expect others to understand you, firstly, you have to understand them.

the hurt so deep. the cut hurt my heart for long, yet i still manage to carry on.

In this world, there's no one who will not be able to live without whoever. The life of yourz is in your hand. you control your life, not others. Being independent, why cant be alone?

I hate people to threaten ending their life coz of whoever. Im once "such people" too.. but now.. it's really time to grow up.

Though no one like being alone.. but at times, you meet with no choice that you have to be alone!

i will be brave..

i will be strong..

it's not the end of the world. =)

oh my.. i just realise, i have a cut on my arm. i tink i accidently hurt myself yest while fliming. i remove my nail polish. im back to "human"! ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:01:00 PM

ghost!

im so ke lian.. flimming goes well quite smoothly tdy..

other den getting some cuts and blue-blacks.. enduring the heatness.. enduring the "dirt".. enduring the pain.. IM STILL FINE!

seriously.. hope the video will turn out NICE!!

we really put in a lot of effort.. put in a lot of hard work.. put in a lot of sweat and PAIN......

out of the sudden... i duno wat i wana blog le... -_-

shall be back to blog later bah~................

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:10:00 AM

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

im a baby

I feel lyk a baby..

I feel lyk a kid..

or..

im just a kid and i never grow up beforE!

HOW SAD!!

i actually cried in front of my frenz? -_-

im suppose to be strong.. but den.. i juz cant control.. and i cried..

jessica said it is common.. so i just treat it as... im thinking too much bah.. maybe i stress myself too much.. tat's why bah~!

Extracted from jessica's blog:

Sometimes we just get lost in the open
Can't see where are we
Can't see who we are
Can't see our identity

Some people get lost in the loneliness
Some get lost in the busy-ness
Some get lost in love
And some get lost in their direction in life

What's yours?!

I often get lost in my identity
That I mean my character
Sometimes I just spend alot of time looking within myself
Who am I and who I am

Some may think that I'm thinking too much

Well but that's just me
Looking for the perfection within
Even when I know I can't
But I just wanna find it and that's my momentum

I may seem not to care about anyone or anything at times
Some people may think what kind of friend am I
Some may think I'm doing things only for myself
Some maybe just care less and can't be bothered with me

Well that's just what people think

I admit I'm bad in expressing my feelings
I always try to
But I always fail to
Sad ain't it?

It's hard to understand people
It's hard for people to understand me too
We have no idea what's going on in their minds
And they have no idea what's going on in our minds

I think someday
Someone could make a tune for this
Turning this into a song
Of mine...

I feel the same too... have no idea wat's going on.. it's hard to understand ppl.. especially.. out of the sudden.. everything become weird! -_-

anyway.. thx jessica and meizhen.. thx for listening.. thx for ur words.. thx for being there.. =) i really tried hard not to cry anymore.. but.. i just cant control.. -_-

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:48:00 PM

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

the ho-heex-ho?

videoing today at home..

everyone is so tired after shooting..

we just have alot of ideas whenever we wana shoot for certain scenes...

vanz and meiyun together with their bfs went for dinner after shooting.. leaving me all alone at home without dinner.... ~waiting to die!!

lao da and lao san "ditched" me!! they alwayz go out without me...!! sObz....

actually.. im.... quite sad.. but... i shall shut up den...

with or without me... i think there isnt a difference AT ALL~~!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:18:00 PM

Monday, June 13, 2005

video week

my team started on our video this week.

today is the first day.. yet im kind of tired. the angle of every shot must be so accurate. the ghosty make up of mine will take me so much time to do it. the nails of mine is scary.

went out to get some food for tml breakfast and lunch for everyone. we are having bbq chicken wing tml.

get to listen to 93.3fm and it's talking about love story again.

ever wonder how it will be lyk falling for your best frenz? as in a guy and a gal. you will be afraid to confess as you know it will affect the friendship. but den somehow, it's alwayz common tat both actually feels for each other yet no one confess and miss their chance just lyk tat. how sad rite?

i went to pray at a temple tat day [i forgot wen]..

i pray for family and health. but yet the one i draw actually stated everything i wish to know. its' says my family will be in good health, so do i. i cant take risk coz it will be too risky for me to take any risk. i cant use my temper to solve all problems. the problem wun be solve my temper yet it will be worse. my relationship will come late. lyk duh~ im 20 this year.. ahaha.. it's kind of late le.. i will be blessed with love and good health in future. will it be true?

happiness... wat is it?

maybe i noe.. maybe i duno.. maybe im juz not sure?

but i guess.. i shall be content with watever i have noe.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:47:00 PM

Thursday, June 09, 2005

im sorry.

sorry gals.. im not helping at all for fyp.. feeling so guilty.. really very sorry about it. it suppose to be my part, yet both of you have to complete it for me. thanks anyway. i promise i will work hard for the animation part alrite. =)

guess im really so not suppose to work. not only missing out the fun, i missed out my time for fyp and my interest for netball. seriously, year 3 sux! i hate to grow up. hate to go through the stress time. hate to bother others to complete my stuff. hate to feel the way i feel now. shall i really not work le?

~~think~~ im falling sick again... it all start with fever, den to cough, to flu, to headache and sick till cant get up from my bed? -_-

going to have a busy week ahead. other den fyp, there's still videoing. we will start fliming next week. hopefully everything will goes well smoothly. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:43:00 PM

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

i cant sleep

how sad? i cant slp.

duh~ im feeling kind of irritated being asked "did you miss me?" everyday. shit him man! i had already told him how i feel le yet he still.... ARGH!! it's irritating. and i super dun like it. plus.. i hate ppl saying "i know wat you mean!"; "i know wat you wan me to do le!" it's really damn irritating lor. how will you know wat i mean wen i never say it out? and i oso din ask you to do anything yet you said you know wat i wan you to do? kaoz. enough! shall not let this "fellow" affect my mood. i shall just reject his call from now on.

being soft-hearted is not the way out ya. i must learn to be strong? like what lao san said. =)

lao da not asleep yet. but waiting for her reply makes me wana slp.. zZzz.. =X *poke pipi

went out with fox today. it suppose to be a pleasant outing, but something crop up in the middle. i dun mind meeting her frenz. i dun mind tagging along. i dun mind waiting for her. wat i mind is you are meeting someone i super dislike. you know about it. yet, you wan me to wait for you? seriously.. i felt myself like an alien.. they looked at me with those stares and talk behind my back. shit them sia. I HATE THE FEELING! idiot! hmpf!

though i know.. i would not feel good, but coz of fox, i just bare with everything. i know she mean it wen she said just meet for awhile. i know she mean it wen she said she will be there with me. but duh~ in the end, i still ended up being with myself. i shall find some cupboard or something to isolate myself out of the crowd. -_- she was there talking with her frenz. i was there sitting and waiting for her.

i..... am not angry..... neither am i super sad.... i just wonder, you know i will feel uncomfortable, why dont let me go off? why must i make a fool of myself in front of ur frenz? why even bother to msg me and say sorry wen you know i wun feel good? and why i din throw temper on you?

idiot... im so not myself..

anyway, im fine ya. just need to blog out everything and i'll be fine le.

meeting silly panda tml(which is today). i guess i will be the panda of the day bah. LOOK AT THE TIME NOW! -_-

hopefully the outing is fun. not like todays'.

yeapx.. and i know, it will be a nice outing. =)

really gotta go and slp le.. even for awhile..

ANGEL_scribbled * -5:20:00 AM

* new template *

im so in love with my new template!

nice rite? i think i like it a lot. =)

spent like about 4 hours to do it. though tired, yet i cant slp. -_-

everyone is asleep now i guess..

tml still have to reach school at 10am.

look at the time now.

eh.. i better get some rest bah. (^00^)

any comment on my template?

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:59:00 AM

Monday, June 06, 2005

it's crap.... ignore wat i said...

im toking rubbish... it's getting late.. and im super tired... yet i cant get to slp...

helped my mei packed her cupboard.. packed my warerobe.. try to squeeze in all my clothes.. and i finish everything within 1 hour. BEST!

i miss ling a lot.. wen will be the next meet up?? wen will you be free for me?

im having my "holidays" which is so not "holidays" now.. occupied with FYP, Videoing, Work, Chalet and meeting up with frenz... but den.. studies still occupied most of my holidays.. hAiz... TIRED!!

nah.. my post is nth but juz complaining.. seriously.. duno and dun wish to blog anymore!

let me rot to death alrite.. duh~ lyk who cares.... -_-

*cRies...

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:34:00 AM

i felt so.... so.... so.... tired....

lao da and lao san seem to enjoy themselves so much at sentosa... and wat am i doing? working my life away.. -_- i missed out the fun or i never belong to the fun before? duh~ im thinking too much ya!!

well... muz congrat lao da.. coz she passed her assessment.. now waiting for TP le.. wish her luck man! =)

i got no idea.. why am i working so hard.. coz of the money? coz of wat shit? i dun even noe.. i alwayz wana depend on myself.. but im just kinda tired of it... nah.. no one supporting me lor.. im supporting myself.. duh~ lyk who is not supporting themselves.. k.. im toking crap..

super pek cek now.. for wat...? i duno.. i seem to be not okie... but den, i duno why oso....

maybe the feeling of neglected bah... duh~ why am i feeling tat way...? mAinez, WAKE UP!!

darling mei is busy over her studies.. shall meet her wen she is free ya.. miss that gal so much.. =)

sisters are neglecting me.. izzit? or i enclose myself into a world of my own?

i............................ am tired!!!!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:22:00 AM

Thursday, June 02, 2005

so sian.. seriously.. i duno what the stupid java thingy is about.. it just make me feel sick!! -_-

i really wana go off.. java is so damn difficult.. i dun wana do anymore!! =(

i woke up late today.. daddy never fetch me to sch.. took a cab to sch and it cost me $11.60. Beside spending on transport, i paid $11.60 to suffer too. the taxi uncle juz keep singing the oldies while driving lor.. juz cannot take it. I thought i can get some rest in the cab.. but in the end, i get to listen to the uncle's concert.. shit him!! =x

look through the problem statement of the day.. i felt so regreted to come to sch.. -_- i missed my bed so much now.. I WANA GO HOME!!

well, K-Lunch is haunting for me too.. wahaha.. =x

lao da and lao san duno wana go anot.. lao da seems to be so uncertain.. lao san and i keep physco-ing.. lao da.. LET's GO ma?? =x

i felt myself blessed with love.. *shy*

thanks for everything you did for me.. though it's silly.. but it did sweeten my heart.. =)

dun be moody coz im sick.. im fine le.. okie?

will be back to update more alrite.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:02:00 AM

Thursday, May 26, 2005

hmm.. alright.. i know i juz blogged.. but somehow.. i feel lyk blogging again.. without knowing wat shld i blog...

maybe i felt neglected bah.......

im so dun feel lyk going to sch.. haiz....

though i know somehow im not alone..

but sometimes.. i just feel so alone..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:07:00 AM

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

k.. im going to turn this into my "personal" blog.. which means.. only ppl i noe can enter.. enough of all those stupid rubbish by those who act as if they know me so much.. crap man!! argh!

well, went out with darling mei tdy.. both of us are feeling so tired.. ahaha.. while shopping, we will nv leave out the word "tired".. maybe we din really slp well recently bah.. and it's really kind of tired ya..

bought a lot of stuff today.. and im kind of broke now.. i got my huge bag le.. i got new bag to use.. =) got myself new top.. new hp housing.. new skirt.. but den i still got a lot to buy.. haven get any earrings yet.. new belt.. new watch.. hmm... shall wait for my next pay den.. =)

ling bought a 3/4 pant for herself.. well, it's kind of ex.. it actually coz 68 bucks for a pant.. but it's frm nike la.. hmm.. well, she lyk it so much, so i tink it's worth it bah.. =)

oh ya.. my sch organised some sport club dinner.. it called "Sport Appreciation Dinner"! It's kind of lame.. but well, guess all netballers had fun ya! of coz.. with our gossip and stuff.. we really enjoyed alot.. we juz spent our night.. gossiping.. playing around with each other.. and taking pictures!! actually, it's a nice place to gather and party all night ya. it's kind of romantic too.. i wana go there and have dinner with my bf in future...!! ahaha.. =x

due to the fact tat the food they serve is super not so nice to eat, we went for supper after the dinner. actually wanted to watch some midnight show de.. but it's kind of late, and we are all tired, therefore we gave it a miss.. hmMmm..

i noe im kinda bad to reject someone.. i felt guitly about it too.. but den.. eh.. i duno wat shld i say.. it's all fated ya.. to be or not to be together..

it's lyk.. even if we missed the chance in the past.. but if ever in future, we are fated to meet each other again, we would not want to miss that chance again..

it's never too late to tell the one you love how you feel.. as long as he/she know and understand, i believe anyone will appreciate the love from one another.. =)

"When you admit to someone that you love them, make sure you know what love is. And day after day from when you have admitted to loving that person, that love should still exist. Love is not a conditional term where you fall in love and then out of it."

i am just an ordinary gal..
hold me close..
dry my tears..

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:59:00 PM

Friday, May 20, 2005

i skipped sch yest.. coz im so sian of sch.. ahaha.. but den.. i still wake up early.. hMmmMm...

had a great day ya.. i duno how to explain.. but the "meeting up" was nice.. heex.. as in.. i enjoyed.. =)

wake up early.. bath and pack my stuff.. wear as normal.. den mummy fetch me to the bus stop.. i swear im kind of early to leave my hse le.. but in the end, im still late. -_- went to PS and meet tat "panda".. why panda? coz he says he look lyk panda.. near to extinct.. being protected animal.. ahaha.. =x we went for a movie. it's a horror movie lor.. amityville horror.. it's a nice show ya!! i lyk it.. very scary sia.. but i dun tink i did make myself embarrassed ya.. ahaha.. so tat's okie.. heex..

after movie went around shopping.. he juz pei me walk for the whole day lor.. so pai seh.. make him go shopping with me oso.. ahaha.. den played pool and stuff lyk tis.. suppose to have jack's place for dinner.. but due to the stupid rain, we went to phin steakhouse instead.. talk a lot about the past and he gave me a bracelet for my 3 years of bday present.. ahaha.. so sweet.. coz i din expect him to give me any present.. =) well.. i got him a present oso.. heex.. just so qiao lor.. i just mention to him tat i wanted to buy bracelet and he already bought me one le.. heex.. =)

well.. it's really a nice outing.. hopefully the next one will be soon.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:31:00 PM

Thursday, May 19, 2005

UPDATES!!

a quick update bah...

read vAn's blog.. CONGRATE guai pei pei!! HE PASSED HIS TP!! =)

ying jie juz send me a sms.. she wans me to describe her in one word.. JUST ONE WORD.. so i replied her..

maybe i shall do the same too.. whoever tat read my blog.. pls tag!! If being asked to describe me in one word.. wat will it be?? TAG PLS!! =)

guess my mood is back to normal.. as in getting hyper again and staying cheerful?? i duno la.. juz back to good mood bah~ =)

went out to celebrate mei's belated bday "dinner". it's not just 2 sisters outing lor.. she brought her frenz along oso.. hmMmm.. so in the end.. i treat all for dinner.. ahaha.. =X but well, nvm la.. im still can afford.. =) bought her the pencil case she wanted and a roxy slipper too.

the outing was fun.. going out with secondary sch gals somehow make me "young"?? ahaha.. beside tat.. tis outing actually proved tat i look younger den my sis.. =x we went in to a shop at cine.. the sales gal actually tot im the same age as my sis they all.. and she said tat if my sis is in home clothes.. she will thought tat my sis is older den me.. ahaha.. LOL!! =x

did i mention tat i cried in class? oh my.. im such a cry baby.. i noe.. i listen to "tian kong".. a new song from Jolin and i cried after listening to the song the 2nd time.. well.. as usual.. the memories haunting me? but den.. no worries.. im okie le.. lyk wat everyone says to me.. it's time to have some changes in myself.. move on and not stuck at the same old point.. i will move on.. and im really moving on le.. =)

get contact with my long-lost frenz recently.. recall a lot about the past and stuff lyk tat.. well.. i liked this silly boy before lor.. ahaha.. =x but den i tink at tat point of time, we are too young for relationship bah.. and as we grow up.. there's lyk so many misunderstanding here and there.. none of us dare to have any action or stuff lyk tis lor.. ahaha.. tis is funny.. "明明在你眼前，明明那么靠近，我们却差肩而过。。" well.. he got someone in mind now le.. so i shall be happy for him rite? =) will be meeting up later.. as in the the afternoon.. ahaha.. hope tat the outing will be a fun one too..

i did some tarot card forture telling last nite.. the result of my love life is..

"i tend to become more mature in r/s.. I will accept ppl's thinking and no longer so stubborn and frenz's advise is impt and helpful to me.if im single, the upcoming bf might be just around the corner and i will never be a person without love.. coz my character is able to attract ppl.. and therefore guys will fall for me.."

as if im tat attractive lor.. well.. i din really attract anyone lor? hMmMmm.. well, since it's online thingy.. it's all if else statement.. all the ans seems to be prepared in the very first place.. so i shall not "trust" it so much den..

hey ppl.. listen to jolin's new song.. "tian kong" is nice!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:30:00 AM

Monday, May 16, 2005

the replies.

ling: i miss you too..!! wen free ar? meet up on fri hao ma?? im missing you lyk crazy.. HUGZ!!

Liting: ahem.. pls have some respect to your grand senior.. =X ahaha.. you den ba chi la.. tootz..

xaO^ciNz: who is the another person? gals having PMS is alwayz lyk tis.. ahaha.. =x

this is wat i deserve.. the happiness i long wanted..

im happy.. for some reason.. really very happy..

i shall pray tat everything will goes out fine..

been so long le.. it's time to see some result in it.. =)

i miss you.. and i really do..

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:41:00 PM

Saturday, May 14, 2005

i wana be myself..

dun wish to fake or goes against myself anymore..

i wana do the things i lyk to do..

think the way i wana be..

trust me tat im unattractive.. nobody wan me.. haha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:08:00 PM

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

mood swinging again?

im crying without a reason again.

maybe coz of the past?
maybe the present?

I realised.. i find no reason to my tears tat are rolling down my cheek.

Izzit due to the mood swing im having now?

I got no idea....

All i know is.. im feeling down..

Hoping someone to be with me now..
but i have no idea who to call.
dont wish to msg.
dont wish to tok.
dont wish to do anything.

i just wish to lock myself up for nothing.

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:31:00 AM

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

upDates

the replies.

steph: yeapx.. am fine ya.. juz rather busy and not feeling well.. =) miss you lOtz too wor..

gwen: hEy.. how have you been? saw you tat day.. and i really cant recognise who is tat "idiot" who block my way sia.. hmpf! ahahah.. jOking.. miss you wor..

xaO^ciNz: Swing gals is nice!! but i tink dun have le ya..

liming-nu er: nvm la.. meet up another tym bah.. ur daddy miss you too.. =)

vance: stay cheerful too.. hopefully ur lappy wil come alive soon.. ahaha.. =x

meimei: ang mei mei! i wan short fringe lor.. but.. hmmMm... still wondering wat to cut.. yEsh my dearest darling.. i understand le.. i wun anyhow le.. heex.. =) thx for being there..

time for some updates. am bored ya.. super bored now.. duno wat im doing oso.. feeling damn sick.. okie.. i tink.. im feeling down for no reason again..

guess.... it's just mood swing ya... -_-

i went back to work on sat and sun. duh.. it tiring alright.. now i understand how tiring it is to study and work at the same time.. maybe tat's why i fall sick... *yAwnz..

mummy just told me tat Serene Yong is my cousin's cousin.. somehow "related" to me.. i laughed! imagine i make fun of her during class and i thought she fall for tat small boy.. ahaha.. SO WEIRD LOR... complete madness...

okie.. im just too bored to even blog.. hack ya.. shall update again sOon.. i mean SOON..

ANGEL_scribbled * -8:34:00 AM

Monday, May 02, 2005

interesting week.. i feel... enjoyed myself with the love from all my close ones!!

wednesday
outing with ah gong! went for lunch. i suppose to treat him.. but for some stupid reason, i cant use my card. in the end, ah gong treat me instead. after lunch.. movie.. finally, i found someone tat is willingly to watch swing girls with me!! NO BAD!! it's a nice show. as in for the both of us ya. ppl who lyk instructments and music will love the show ya! it's kind of COOL! after movie.. went for a walk.. ah gong saw his long wanted xiao mian yang. i find it cute too. but though he lyk it, he din buy it. so in the end, i decided to get it for him. SUPPOSE to give him a surprise by sneaking away to get it for him.. but i failed.. coz.. he's TOO CLEVER!! hmpf! no fun!! =)seriously.. i feel tat he is giving himself too much stress ya. maybe sch work really stress him up sia.. he dun seems to be happy.. but feeling "woried"! hmmm.. i duno why ya.. but hopefully, he will gets to enjoy himself and relax ya.. =)

thursday
sch as usual.. touching on the cam and stuff lyk tat.. kind of cool.. but no one wana act.. so we are looking for actress.. anyone can help?? after sch.. went tiong for dinner.. and i tink.. my memory is damn bad.. i forgot wat i ate le.. but i remember watching movie tat day with dear.. not bad la.. but i dun really quite lyk it.. hmm... but seriously.. WU YAN ZU damn SHUAI!! ahaha.. =x

friday
went out with ling and sunzi. it suppose to be a HAPPY and ENJOYABLE and PLEASANT gathering for the 4 of us.. but for some reason.. our mood had been spolit! but NVM.. wat i matter most is my darling gal and my sunzi.. as long as we did enjoy for a moment, im also quite glad about it ya. =)

saturday
meet dear after his work. went over to look for him. waiting for meiyun to call me wher to meet up, as we are suppose to celebrate jason's bday. waited from 7 to 10.. finally she called. we meet up at cine. In the end, we decided to watch movie.. xXx 2. nice show ya.. at least it din make me fall aslp.. coz i dun really enjoy action movie ya.. =x jason really has some phobia in bday cake ya.. hmm.. he had an earthquake as his bday cake instead! =x but den.. it's also a pleasant outing ya. AS LONG AS IM WITH MY GALS YA!! =)

sunday
family day! heex.. i stayed home the whole day until we went out for dinner.. the feeling of having family members nagging around is so different from the feeling staying alone outside. thus, i love my dearest family.. ahaha.. oh my.. made me sound so mummy gal.. ahaha.. =x

dear and meiyun finally enrol for their bike.. most prob, i will oso be giving them my moral support on tue!! so van and i shall get some pong pong and cheer for them ya.. ahaha.. =x anyway, JIA YOU WOR!!! =) muAckz..

enough of craps sia.. i shall go get something to eat ya.. feeling a little hungry after my "night" swim with my sis.. ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:20:00 AM

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

guess everything is fine now ya.. HAPPY!!

sorry for making my darlings worried for me.. im really fine le.. no more stupid nor silly thoughts le... =)

the replies.

ade: dearie.. im fine le.. no more cutting or slashing le.. need to grow up right.. =)

vaNz: yeapz.. everything can be solved de.. and it's solve now.. heex.. thx for being there.. i know you and meiyun will be there for me! =)

jessica: i oso duno wat happened to me.. ahaha.. but everything is settled le lor.. i will cheer up and face all obstacle bravely de.. =)

Jayz: something to do with relationship problem la.. but now it's okie le.. =) thx for concern.

wei ping: i linked you le!! miss you lOts too!! heex..

meimei: ANG mei mei!! gal ar.. thx for being there.. and thx for talking some sense to me! actually, dun feel tat i will be offended or wat ya.. i treat you and vAnz lyk sisters and real good frenz.. you all have the right to say me, scold me or watever de.. i wun be angry de.. really.. =) i wun do silly things to hurt myself le.. i still wana earn alot to bao yang you and vAnz ma.. so i will continue my life happily de.. well.. not sad le bah.. i learnt alot.. and it's juz a lesson to me bah.. no matter wat.. we will stay as close as we are now k.. and duh... say watever you wan next time k.. i really wun be angry de.. heex.

ling: LOVE YOU TOO!! i know you are alwayz there for me too!! =) im much stronger den before le.. no worries alright!

learn to grow up.. learn not to trust ppl tat easily.. maybe im juz too soft hearted and trust ppl too easily.. tat's why everyone close to me are so worried about me... SORRY~...

it's my character isnt it? if anyone really cheat me or bluff me.. i will be really very sad.. very very sad... i wana be protected forever.. ppl who love me.. pls protect me from harm.. heex..

had a fun time on sun. though still not really feeling okie.. but i still went out and try to enjoy myself to the fullest!!

meet up with da jie, ah shar and lao gong! say it's a class outing.. but in the end, only 4 person turn up.. =( hard to gather them out for an outing sia.. sadded!! hmpf!!

shopped around and went kbOx.. not going into details la.. but juz very fun outing with them lor.. at least they cheer me up ya.. heex.. =X

skipped sch yest.. kaoz.. ya.. the 2nd week of sch only.. i SKIP!! too bored and moodless le.. therefore i dun intend to go sch.. went for breakfast at mac as usual.. and after tat K lunch!! ahaha.. seriously.. i tink alot during the outing.. did really enjoy it.. think alot and stuff lyk tat.. duno am i doing the right choice.. but i feel tat.. it will be the best for all.. i dun wish to be accuse as 3rd party.. neither do i wana come in between anyone.. therefore, wat i decided will be the best way out bah.. =)

gal skipped sch again... she said tat her hair is ugly.. tat's why she skipped sch.. ahaha.. funny sia... nvm.. i tink it will look cute lor.. hMmmmm....

vAnz and gal temp me to cut hair sia.. now thinking of hairstyle to cut.. any suggestion? ahem..

i shall concentrate le la.. having lesson now sia.. heex..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:35:00 PM

i lay awake in my bed..
as thoughts of you filled my mind..
tons of questions started running though my head..
with a million and one whys..

if only i had that courage..
if only i fight for happiness..
if only i grabbed that chance..
before it was all gone..

i never thought it would end up this way..
day and night memories flash through my mind..
a part of me want to move on..
a part of me dont want to let go..
words from my mouth are what i tell others..
but deep in my heart it tells another..
a decision i find it hard to decide..

if ever i were to move on..
i wont want our memories to fade day by day..
hurt as i am by what i hear..
tryin to fight back the tears from flowing..
i feel so lost..
i wish you could tell me everything's an illusion..
and all i only know right now is..
how much my heart longs for u..

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:29:00 AM

Sunday, April 24, 2005

A terrible night.

im not a gal tat deserve anyone's love.

am such a bitch. shld juz lock myself up and be alone. how am i going to forget?

i brought all this upon myself? ya.. tat's right! how i wish i wun grow up! how i wish i can stay the same! how i wish i will nv change! how i wish i will be a princess forever!

i guess i nv have the chance to be a princess again. nv have the chance to be loved. nv have the chance to be dote.

loving someone doesnt mean i have to have the person..
letting go of the person i love could bring me unnecessary hurt..
if letting go, could bring the person i love happiness..

then letting go, would inturn bring me happiness..
for seeing the one i love being happy..
makes my heart fill with satisfaction..
and knowing that by lettiin go, i've made the right decision..

touching on something tat i did during sec sch.. find it stupid though.. but i did use it for 1 time. and the moment i saw something flowing out.. i find myself so stupid and silly.. even though.. this is one of the way to release my guilt?....................

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:46:00 AM

Friday, April 22, 2005

i miss my darling mei.. meeting her tml!! so happy!!

studies really makes me damn stress. stress over fyp.. over modules.. over netball.. haiz.. hardly have time for FUN.. if im going out for fun.. i really have to enjoy every moment.

today is such a tiring day.. i went to school with my puffy eyes.. yeapx.. did cry last night.. tat's why.. well, shall not mention abt it la...

super tired coz i din get enough rest. was stress the whole day coz im writing on the script for my team video. hopefully, i will get something interesting! -_-

though tired.. i still went out with mei yun and vAnz for our "long wanted to eat" sushi!! yUm yUm!! eat so much sia.. and made so much fun even though we are having our dinner.. ahaha.. =x shall not elaborate much on it.. coz it's quite R(A) jOkes.. ahaha.. =x

after dinner.. pool again at cine.. i trash all of them!! ahaha.. the loser had to take off something from her body. in the end, i only took off my card holder. wahahaa...

been spending alot lor.. i think meiyun and vAnz have to bao yang me soon le.. until i got my com..

yAwnz. tired sia. my post getting shorter and shorter right? -moodless-

shall get some rest before i have puffy eyes tml again!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:39:00 AM

Monday, April 18, 2005

the replies.

jolin: thx. i added you already. =) waiting for you to confirm worz.. =)

jukes: heex.. thx lao gong! we going out on SUN!! yeah!! hope tat outing will be fun FUN FUN!! missing you so much. and i understand wat you mean. i know how you feel. *understand* =D

xaO^ciNz: ya lor.. no choice.. i wana bao yang all my darlings..!! ahaha.. =x

tania: where are you working? holiday right..?

vaNz: yeah yeah!! Big breakfast! K lunch!! all waiting for us! YESH! =x

grace: i dun have your link. give me alright? and i'll link you.

steph: aiai.. miss you too. yeapx.. i will jia you! you too alright?

meimei: meeting out is so FUN! i tink we are really meant for each other.. ahaha.. =x muAckz

ade: dearie.. miss you too.. dun tink so much ya.. everything gonna be fine.. tym will heal. =)

First day of sch.. had fun of coz.. alot of crap and lame jokes.. alot of topic to say.. to update and alot alot!! FUN FUN FUN!!

well.. guess alot of ppl really miss me ya.. ppl lyk.. ah gong.. my darling gals.. my lao gong.. my aiai.. my dearie... so much more.. HAPPY!!

little princess.. im their little princess!! ahahah.. =x

opps.. i get my bluetooth adapter.. therefore.. i can transfer lots of thing for my com to phone.

looking forward to the outing on sun.. coz i miss sem 1 year 1 class so much!! miss watching da jie and ah zhi fight. miss liming nu er. miss gossiping with lao gong. miss ah pa. miss sharon the bowling ball. miss having fun together. juz miss all so much!!

think im going to slp soon.. tml stil got sch. shall update again soon.. as i got more tym now.. ahaha... =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:54:00 PM

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

As usual.. busy with work.

suppose to end work at 10th april.. but den.. for the sake of my licence and future spending.. decide to work till sch reopen. gonna be tiring.. but nvm den..

meet up with my darling gals on mon. though it's kind of a short meet up, but we still have fun together. miss those FREE DAYS!!

meiyun and i are working.. therefore, van and jessica will be so free. but nvm.. we work to bao yang them.. ahaha.. so they benefit in the end!! ahaha..

it's kind of great to meet up and have fun together. though there's some unhappy stuff tat happened, but we still manage to make some joke out of it. ahaha.. duno to say us silly or.. we are plain tired ya..

oh my.. im missing so many ppl now.. but lyk none miss me lei..

i miss my lao gong.. but he nv even bother much abt me.. HAIZ!! so sad!! really sad!! hmpf!!

i miss my darling gals.. ling, meiyun, vanz, jessica.... i miss my sun zi.. miss my ah gong.. HAIZ...

work is really rather tiring.. how i wish i could stop work straight away.. BUT.. for the sake of i have to bao yang so many darlings.. ahaha.. i tink i better work hard!! =x

gonna go orn orn le.. tml still got WORK!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:26:00 AM

Monday, April 04, 2005

the replies.

berlx: heex.. miss you too! sorry been busy with work. cant really talk to you and stuff. hope you dun mind ya. anyway, yeapx.. movies one of the days lor. wen im not working and also wen kriz got off day k. =) hUgz!!

vaNz: hmpf! im turning 20.. not a small gal le. i dun eat crabs lyk a small gal. alan and meiyun also eat the same way as me. we are the small gal and small boy gang!! ahaha.. =x OPPS!

ling: ya lor.. was kinda a "little" gathering only. SADDED!! miss you so much now ya. anyway, bear with it. im ending my work soon. which means more time for you and my dearest frenz!! =) we shall arrange about the chiong-ing part ya. also duno where to chiong nowadays..

liting: no no.. i got perfect eye sight lor.. ahaha.. am SURE it's ur pic ALONE!! ahaha.. nvm.. since you force me to admit.. i juz admit it lor.. no choice.. you FORCE one!!

okie.. as usual.. busy with work. actually dun intend to come online but den, some "interesting cum bo liao ppl" attract me to come online!

ahaha.. really LOL! the moment i saw the tags.. i really LOL! hey hey, fake vaNz/Prince/Melinda/annoymous, i think you really know me quite well ya. but i dun tink you know me tat well to the extend tat you know im studying IT!! maybe you shld start studying more about IT before you go around tagging others blog ya. so you think sisters' relationship is tat easily broken by you? or you think true friendship is so fragile too? though im not a gal tat you might lyk, but den, im still being loved by alot of my dearest frenz! i saw your tags, i really pity you sia. so free to the extend tat you can actually go around ppl's blog and tag. you really got no one to tok to or to go out with ar? ao poorthing. maybe you shld go to the temple and pray for some "ren yuan". i think you really need tat ya.

well.. enough of tat.. it's kind of bo liao and irritating.. i find myself "childish" in replying back also.. argh.. silly me..

anyway.. nice outing with meiyun, vanz, ling and their bfs... other den something "unpleasant", everything is still quite fine.

to meiyun: gal ar.. get more rest sia.. you got panda eyes le.. still dun wana slp early.. and also dun wat supper at 4am la.. unhealthy lei.. ahem!! eat more.. but eat healthy! okie?

to vAnz: aiyoyo.. you also another one.. get more rest ya! better consult a doctor about your eyes if it continue to hurt k. coz it might become serious wor.. this kind of thing ya, dun play play hor.. ask guai pei pei accompany you to a doctor k. =)

to ling: EAT MORE CAN? you are slimming down lei. and PLUS, take care of ur gastic la.. aiyoyo.. alwayz dun eat well. dun save here and there ya.. i end work le will bring you out to eat BIG MEAL k? heex.

to jessica: my dearest guan yin ma!! meet up soon k. though you cant meet up with us tat day, but nvm.. still got other day k.. =) miss you lots too.. take care.. about our FYP, we tok about it after i end my work hao ma? i haven forget about it wor. heex.

long time nv see them, really feel as if i got alot to tell them, but wen i faced them and go out with them, everything swollow back to my stomach. [no wonder my stomach so BIG!] but den, no matter wat.. GALS!! i wana you all to know, i really miss you all alot.. and thx for being there!!! really thx!! appreciate it alot.. shall meet up soon ya.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:23:00 AM

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

the replies.

ade: ahaha.. silly.. you shld walk up to me and ask me am i charmaine right? waste ur time go down and nv even get to talk to me.. silly..

liting: ahaha.. okie.. you are trying to say me right? ahem!! dun try to bluff k.. ahem!! i saw ur pic taken by yourself on friendster lor.. ahaha.. =x you also zi lian la.. hmpf!!

Melinda: AHEM!! do i know you? i tink you got a big problem with my blog ar? I dun tink i need to act ya. and i dun need you to define me as pretty or not. I never even once i admit tat im pretty. so do you have any problem with tat? maybe you shld do some check up to your eyes or something wrong in your mind.

well.. weird ppl alwayz visit my blog.. hmm.. duno why also.. anyway.. shld not bother? simply cant be bothered? they thought they will make me angry or fed up? nah!! why shld i? the more you say, the happier i am. coz you are taking notice and wasting time on someone you dislike? WERID ppl ritE?

anyway.. work have been tiring as usual. lao gong came down to find me but im not working.. gal come and find me but im out for break. wasted! in the end. no one visited me? hmpf! anyway.. i made a nice frenz tdy. her name is XiuLi. she is damn cute lor.. maybe it is kind of fated, coz i was so not wanted to go over there and work, in the end, i went down and get to know her. Indirectly.. fated right? =) she is a nice gal anyway.

sales been super bad recently.. NO ONE WANA BUY THINGS!! coz i juz realise, PAY IS NOT OUT YET. everyone got no money to shop. so no one wana buy EXTRA things. heex.. maybe april will be a better month. HOPEFULLY!! *praying hard* =)

missing LING so much.. gal oso.. van.. jessica.. haiz.. wen wen wen? i asked them to date me out but none call me? so sad!! hmpf~!! gal hor.. say will contact jessica and let me know, in the end, i called her, no one pick up the phone! BEST!!! AMY ANG MEI MEI!! faster contact me!! ahaha.. =x

kk.. i go orn orn le lor.. tired.. tml morning shift sia.. hMMmmm.. nightz...

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:47:00 AM

Friday, March 25, 2005

a short post!!

the replies.

jukes: lao gong!! heex.. i love complaining ma.. not tat you duno right? but working is really tiring ma!! no meh? hmmppff.. you also never help me massage my leg wen it hurts. sObz!! i miss you lei!! =X ya.. i will jia you!! you also muz jia you in studies okie? hUgz.. miss miss!! lOVE yOu lOtz.. muAckz.. take care ya..

meimei: GAL!! yaya.. will take care!! =) you also k.. i miss you so much!! heex.. hUgz!!

ade: dun worry!! is my sister!! she is being.... hmmmm.. nvm.. i explained to you le.. ahaha..

xw: yaya.. i dun understand alright? HAPPY?? you are the best!! you are right and im wrong!! fine with it ya??

ling: oRh.. be sure tat no matter wat unhappiness muz tell me k.. i dun wana be the last to now. and no matter im working or not.. you will alwayz be my first priority! dun worry you will disturb me k.. =) you will never ever disturb me ya! hUgz.. miss you lOtz.. and lOve you lOtz!

June: i actually uploaded my song into my sch server! i duno wher to get chinese song. =)

vaNz: i told you in your blog le ya.. =)

Mz: hello!! yaya.. will take care.. you also k.. muz eat more hor.. forever so skinny.. aiyoyo!! need more fats!!

alright.. quick post on my recent stuff. =)

everyone is so free hor? creating so many new template!! wah!! so nice!! i got no time sia!! sObz!! still working hard to earn money and bao yang my GALS!! ahahaa.. =x

WED MY OFF DAY!!!! quick quick!! date me out please!!!! im missing you gals so so so much!! pls.. date me out!! WED!!! =)

still the same.. missing the same old ppl again.. ling, meiyun, vanz, jessica, sunzi, eugene, ade..... so on.... miss everyone and those "NORMAL" life wen im on holiday and im not working!! sObz..

well.. i shall not complain more coz my lao gong said i complain too much! but den.. my leg still hurts la.. hmmMmmm.... kk.. i will continue jia you.. and EARN MORE!! yeah!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:19:00 AM

Monday, March 21, 2005

dOwn

feeling a little down now. well, actually not a little.. as in.. quite down.

i seems to be too selfish.

am i?

i think i neglected a lot of ppl ya? i wonder why am i seems to be the last one to know? why she's feeling upset and i don't know? i thought by not disturbing her to study will be good for her. but seem like, im totally wrong? well.. i really dont know what to say. missing her lOts. called her and she is studying.. so i didnt wana disturb and stayed all alone at bugis to wait for dear. knowing that if i go visit her, i will be wasting her studying time. but i think i made the wrong move for not going down. guess, she had alot to say yet no one to say to bah? seriously, im so sad over it. crying soon. my darling sister, PLS!! though im working, but i will alwayz have the time to talk to you. anytime after my work. no matter how tired i am okie? dont keep everything to yourself. IM HERE ALRIGHT?

as usual.. missing the same old ppl again. of coz ling, sunzi, jake, gal, van, jessica, eugene...... so on.... haiz.. work have been tiring.... and my leg hurts so much each day.

dear said, im born to be a princess.. shld not even work coz i complain alot. opps... =x nah.. maybe im just plain lazy. guess i need to buck up ya!

netball on sat. took tat day off specially for the game. NICE meeting up with my fellow netballers. tired tired!! im just simply so tired. not enough rest and not enough slp.

trust me. im falling soon.

had a big fight with dear on sat. injured myself by doing silly things. but who cares!! i cant be bothered anymore. im so tired tat i got nth to fight back or defend myself. i just do silly things to show my anger and fraustration. i know my temper caused everything out. but den.... this is my temper!! if you love me, love my temper too!

well, im really tired. resting soon. nite!

btw, i miss SERENE CHOVAL NEO XIAO LING and AMY ANG MEI YUN tons!!

not forgetting my dearest gf, VANZ and guan yin ma, JESSICA!!

MISS ALL!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:56:00 AM

Friday, March 18, 2005

the replies.

ade: work will alwayz make ppl busy isnt it? ahahah.. hopefully you wun be so suay bah.. =x nvm about the anonymous la. they are just giving comment. as in, everyone got their right to comment a thing is nice or not nice ya.

vaNz: ya lor.. im really working very hard!! heex, i will inform you all wen is my off day k. =)

Sophia: thx for ur comment. i tink my frenz are very protective over me as they feel that maybe your comment will hurt me indirectly and they totally dun agree with you. but anyway, i wun change my template or remove my pic. coz, it suits my design. =) sorry for shocking you den. thx for ur comment anyway. =)

ling: SERENE CHOVAL NEO XIAO LING!! miss miss miss miss miss you tons!!! please study hard alright!! =) take good care!!

wah.. alot of ppl commenting about my blog ar? anyway, am still busy. tired too. getting some rest soon. juz came online to say HELLO to my dearest frenz!! =) miss everyone lOtz. take care everyone. hugz and kisses!!

I MISS SERENE CHOVAL NEO XIAO LING TONS!!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:38:00 AM

Thursday, March 17, 2005

I miss SERENE NEO XIAO LING tons!!

the replies.

ling: heex. thx for fighting back for me. =) gal, i miss you so so so much!! we shall meet up soon k. meet me for lunch or anything ya. i really wana see you so much!! hUgz!! miss misS!!

liting: hey gal, you are suppose to send me ur pic. wher wher? ahaha.. thx. i oso lyk this template lots. =) ya lor.. a bit weird ar. if i leave my pic out, who will noe it's my blog?

anonymous: thx for ur comment. i have my reason for putting my pic up right? im quite content with my design. =) if i consider ur idea, my blog will look so plain with just something diamond in the middle. weird right? if not, you send me ur pic, and i put urz up. see will it be better lor. by the way, i spend a lot of time and effort to design this template so i dun tink i deserve this kind of comment. but..... thx anyway. =)

steph: aiai.. not ma fan. but you have to wait till i got time and i burn for you k. hopefully it can be burn ya. heex. =) im working at OG. msg you about the location lor. i will take care of myself. no worries k. =) hUgz. miss you lots.

jessica: ahaha. okie den. i shall not call you tat for now. ahahah.. =x yeapx.. i will take care. gal is at home rotting. taking very good care of herself, so you dun have to worry about her. ahaha.. =x miss k-ing!!! my off day we all go out together k?? heex.

ade: dearie!! been so busy with work and you are juz so suay to see her ya!! oPps!! hopefully i have the time to visit you k. if not, you come and visit me intead k. heex. take care. miss you!

alright. i really miss alot of ppl NOW NOW NOW!

1st: my darling mei!!

2nd: my hubby, my baby!!

3rd: sun zi & jake di!!

4th: meiyun & jess & van!!

5th: ade dearie!!

6th: eugene!!

7th: aiai!!

8th: lesly xiao mei & jayius!!

9th: ashley kor & buddy & xue er mei!!

10th: michelle jie & all my jies!!! [including jenn, karen. michelle loke.....]

and alot alot alot more!! i cant list out all at a go.. but i really miss alot alot of ppl!!

work had occupied most of my time. im now stealing my sleep time and rest time to blog and update myself about my close one's problem.

i know i have been missing alot. please bare with me. is not tat i dun care, is juz tat im working. for those who are feeling down, CHEER UP alrite? feel free to call me. even if i missed your call, i will still call you back!! =)

no time for everything. no movies. no ktv. no watching tv. no gossiping. no coming online. NO TIME AT ALL!!

everyday is just work wORk WORK!!!!!

i wish i have time for everyone i care. sObz.. for my future, i shall continue to work hard. PLUS!! i need to bao yang mei yun, vAnz and jessica lei!! heex. =X

dear frenz, take good care alright!! i miss all of you tons!! esp. my darling mei!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:32:00 AM

Monday, March 14, 2005

NO TIME

the replies.

MZ: mOrning.. okie.. everyday good morning k. =) enjoy ur holidays too.. heex.. thx for ur comment. i lyk tis plain design too.

mei yun: if i got time, i do one for you k.. =) meanwhile, learn how to do ya. will help in our project de.. i tink..~

adel: thx. ur template not bad too ya. i lyk. =)

berlx: im not naughty k. i juz too tired to go to sch. ahaha. ur template oso nice ma. still say mine.

mich: i got! i got! i send you the song lor. =) provided i got come online and see you online la. heex. =) i dun look great. photo edit out de. not counted. heex.

ling: duh.. im going to make one for you too. dun envy k. be good. i miss you lots too. working now. no time online. come dwn my work place visit me lei. i miss you so much. but i gotta work. sOb!! i jio you out on my off day k. =)

steph: aiai.. i got almost all his song. you want i can send or burn for you. tell me about it k. =)

xaO^ciNz: bio mean.. "look" in hokkien.

ade: dearie. heex.. thx thx.. im alwayz pretty to you right? ahahah.. =x

jessica: guan yin ma!! heex. tag all you wan. i wan my tagboard to be noisy! ahaha.. =x

thankz everyone for tagging. yeah.. i love my tagboard to be noisy!! heex..

anyway, been busy wOrking working working working. no time for everything. super busy. come home slp. wake up go work. haiz.. tiring lei.. this is the working society sia!!

my dear friends... please dun be angry with me if i have no time to go out. coz im really busy with work. if you all really miss me, msg me and ask me wen is my off day k. =) den we arrange to go out. heex.

thanks for those who comment on my blog. yeapx. it's a simple blog. hope everyone will lyk my design. =) thanks for everyone's compliment too. =D im glad tat i manage to get my template done and everyone seems to lyk it alot too.

my leg is numb. i stand for 6 hours plus. [minus my break time and those "eat snake" time la.] tiring!! working is tiring!! sOb!!! but for the sake of my pocket money!! I WANA WORK!! ahaha..

i look so lyk office lady. i make up to work lor. actually, i dun really lyk making up lei. hmmm... can i dun make up lei? [im lyk asking myself stupid qns. oh well, nvm!]

tired la.. gonna slp soon le. miss me everyone!! heex.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:17:00 AM

Friday, March 11, 2005

a new start.

my new design.

a little plain. but i like.

anyway, im too focus on my template last night and i forgot to blog. =x

pon school yest yet i woke up early. went out with jess, gal and hong shen. we went kbOx. starting off is me with tat "haven wake up" voice. sickening. gal la, she "delicate" the song for me. HOW NICE OF HER.

a crazy day i would say. we sang a lot of very emotional songs den in the end we all got so tired. there's when we started to be crazy. we started looking through the list of songs and choose songs tat we never sing or rather.. seldom sing. Songs like; twinkle twinkle little star[children song], bengawan Solo[malay song], tuo diao[alex toh], fang shou[energy], super star[s.h.e].... All of us actually "wake up" after so many "interesting" songs. ahaha..

after ktv, of coz pool session for us. Went up to play. Hong Shen dont know how to play, so gal and i teach him. Jess left around 4+ for her gym. I stay and play with gal while hong shen is at another table practicing. There's some group of guys beside our table. let's say about the one beside us. They just keep bio-ing us as if the whole K pool only got 2 gals, who is gal and me. Apart from that, they keep smiling and making fun of each other.. trying to attract our attention. the second group, the one in front of our table. They also keep bio-ing and being AA!! oh my god.. i think they very coward lor. wana come know gals also dun dare. -_-

gal and i got pek cek over it and we stop playing pool and change to billard instead. After we change to billard, the group of guys in front of our pool table left. [i assume they thought we left.] wen they are paying, i went over to get a chalk. and they saw me! again.. i duno wat are they looking at.. so i just walk my way. After tat i heard them saying, "ta men hai mei zou. zai da billard." Immediately.. i LAUGH OUT LOUD. guys nowadays ar... got nth to say sia.

went for a walk before going for training at kallang. gal meet her friend and we took neoprints. shall upload it later. =) was late. made kathy and kelly wait for me at mac. in the end, we take a cab to netball center. warm up and stuff before starting the game. As usual, had a lot of fun and laugher. FUN!!

After the game, dad and mum come fetch me. we went to lavander square center for dinner. i din eat anything. Just a plate of fruits and my fav ice lemon tea. yum yum. tat's my dinner! my dad scolded me for going on diet. he said tat i will have no energy if i never eat proper meal. =x like.. watever.. i hack!!

now in school for web application. BORING! chris bluff us to come sch. it's different from wat we do. sickening. going to scold him le. well, shall go for breakfast ya.

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:22:00 AM

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

ling.

darling mei! thanks for being there all the while. After so many years, you are the only one that stand by me till now. How lucky am i to have you as my little sister. Apart from supporting me in everything i do, i guess you are the one who are able to understand how i really feel. Towards my ex, towards my present stead and present life.

You have changed. Changed to a different girl that I know in the past. Maybe not the word change, but 'grown up'. Maybe im lag by the upcoming changes that everyone is having. I seems to be the same old me still. Or, i havent grow up? Our mindset is starting to be different. Even so, i doubt the feeling for each other will be different ya. I love you as much still. You will forever be my darling mei.

Whenever you seem to be upset over your present bf and lifestyle, i felt so pain and xin tong. Wondering are you trying to change yourself to adpat to him? why do you have to be hard on yourself? why do you put yourself into such a position where you can hardly be happy? The power of love? perharp that's what you really have in mind. To be happy with your love one, you dont mind sacrificing. I can understand coz after all i been through before. Or maybe that's only how i feel?

I really hope it's true when you tell me that he really treats you well. it's true that you are happy. it's true that you are blessed with love now. Hope that he will bring you happiness and no sadness or anger.

From an 'unreasonable' princess of ours [mine, kriz, huishan and ally's], from a 'ba dao' de 'da nu ren' to a silly, sweet, gentle 'xiao nu ren', maybe it's a good change. After all, gals still have to be gentle and be sweet towards their bf de ma. But than, i still prefer the old you. =x

No matter what, promise me that you are not gonna hide anything from me. We have no secrets. I dont wish to be the last to know too. If you are feeling sad, tell me about it. If you are feeling happy, share your joy with me. You know I will be happy for you too. If you feel wei qu, also must tell me k. I help you revenge. hmpf! I mean it when i say i love you lots. and you will forever be my little princess. hUgz. muAckz. i cherish you lOtz.

dearie.

i understand how you feel. just that there's really no cure to the hurt that had been created by her. remember me saying, time will heal? it will really heal all sadness and heartache in you. it's just a matter of time.

apart from listening to you, there's nothing else i can help le. everything has to depend on you yourself. Only your heart listen to yourself. your heart doesnt listen to me. missing your ex is kinda normal. like hell, who dont miss their ex at times right? maybe due to you are still single, you tend to think about her good and neglect ppl around or going around knowing other better choice.

Without her, it's not the end of the world. With her is a kind of habit, without her is another kind of lifestyle you going to adpat. Been so long le, you have to kick the habit of her being around you. Without her love, be glad that she is still your friend. Without her, be glad that you are adpating a new kind of lifestyle. Without her, be glad that you will be able to look out for other better choice. Think Positive is the word.

It's easy to say, hard to be done. All i can say is BE YOURSELF. you dont have to overeact over her. you may feel a little sad, but the sadness would not stay for long. Seriously, it's more on mindset. With the determination to forget and give up, i believe you will succeed.

I alway believe that, sadness will only last for a period of time. Over that period of time, you will get tired of it and will try to move on. If you continue to be sad, you will forever be stuck at the same point and be left behind by the others. Is this the way you want your life to be? Relationship might be important. On another hand, how about studies, career, friends? All doesnt matter to you anymore?

I hope what i said make some sense to you. Hopefully you will understand. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:34:00 AM

Silence.

for now,

i just wana be left alone.

im such a disappointment.

im making the wall inside my heart.

i dont wana let my emotions get out.

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:35:00 AM

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

my dearest bOy and me!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:56:00 AM

B-O-R-E-D

the replies.

henry: yesh! it's fann wong. pretty right?

steph: im not bothering over it. i know it's over and time will heal. i believe im strong enough to face all this myself. apart from that, im actually the cause of my unhappiness? yeapx. trust me that i gonna stay strong alright. inform me when will you be free alright? waiting for your reply. =)

liting: yeapx. so when are you sending me your NICEST PHOTO?

as per normal day? dad send me to sch but i took a bus back to dear's hse. weird me right? but im tired. just plain tired and i need to get more sleep.

dear cooked porridge for me as breakfast and after that i sleep till 3pm. pig right? hiakz!

just a normal day for me. nothing special or interesting apart from the fun chat with jayius and lesly at dear's place. we just keep making fun of each other and stuff like that.

im starting work soon. so before working, i think i need to get plenty of rest den.

oh ya. i feel that im so damn silly to actually such long testimonial for someone and in the end, he deleted it. small kid will forever be a kid. dont know how to appreciate ppl's effort for writing testimonial for him. and i guess, he deleted the one he wrote for me too. well, nvm den.

messaging gal now. silly gal sent me a good night msg and i reply her my misery! poor gal. heex. but at least she is willing to listen and ask me to miss her instead. ahaha. of coz i will. MISS MY DARLING GAL LOTS!! =) thx for being there. this is from the bottom of my heart.

after all, im not only blessed with love. im also blessed with love from friends. seriously, i think i need to write some essays to express how i feel towards them ya? just like what ah gong did. heex.

i need to start on my PP le. gosh! it's a 1 yr project and i only have less den 1 week to finish it. POWER right? heex. so i shall start now den. -_-

p.s. i will think of gal, vanz and jessica!!!! miss the 3 of them lOtz!! nightz!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:29:00 AM

Monday, March 07, 2005

i am okie.

i blogged that because im bored. dun mind about me den. it's just the past that's haunting me. I shld be getting on with my new life now. and of coz, im happy with my dear.

im blessed with love.

i also never wana hurt my dear. everything between my ex and i is over le. as ah gong said, ex.. meaning expire.. so i shld not be missing someone who is "expired" in my heart. and most of all, i shld not have hurt my dear any more.

seriously, i love my dear lots. he's working so hard for our future. and i cant do anything other den trying hard to be more understanding and caring towards him. believe me that i can do it alrite?

i know firstly, i have to control my stupid bloodly bad temper. dear cant really tolerate my temper after one day of tiring work. so i shall learn to control my temper den.

there's so much i need to improve on. it's hard being perfect right? nvm. i shall tryin being the perfect gal dear wants. =)

nite nite.. im going to slp.

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:33:00 AM

Sunday, March 06, 2005

trust me. im going to cry in any moment.

decided to blog this down. nothing gotta do with friendship. it's relationship. i always thought that im had been deeply hurt. and yes, i am. but somehow compare to the others, mine might be just "nothing" to them.

I remembered the day you became mine. 2/2/2002. A nice date. I felt a happiness that was never gonna end. All I did was to think of u, love you, miss you. Day and night I prayed that we will be together forever. I believed you when you said that you will never gonna hurt me. you will never gonna leave me. Promises that you made to me. I kept it inside my heart. you said that you will love me forever. you said that you will do anything just for me!!

Am i being a fool for believing in you? Do you really mean what you say? Do you really care about me? Do you really love me? Do you? I never thought that you will hurt me. I never expect the hurt will be so deep. We said that we will go through everything together. Why are you leaving me all alone here? I tried my best to change everything u dislike in me. Whatever you want me to do, I will do it for you. I ignore all the rumors I heard. I ignore bad points of yours. I ignore the amount of gals you once crush on. I ignore all the bad stuff bcoz all i want is to be with you. I never wanna leave you but why did u leave me instead?

I gave you my love that cannot be shared, my heart and soul that belong to you, my care and concern no one has ever receive. But wat did you give me in the end? All you left for me is heartbreak, sadness, pain and misery. I dont understand why would you leave me if you said your love for me is real? I dont understand why you broke my heart when you said you will never break my hurt? Why you left me with a scar so deep? I cant figure out why did we made promises to each other when they were really meant to be broken. I asked myself what did I go wrong. How did I made you leave me? Blaming myself. Crying each day, yet I still dont know why you walk out of my life? I always thought we will be FOREVER TOGETHER. But why did you step out?

You were my first love. My one and only that I treated so well. The love that i gave you is never ending. I trusted you with all my heart, that you will never gonna break it. I never thought it was so wrong to give you all my heart hoping that you will take good care of it. Instead, you broke it and tore it apart. Left me for another girl. Left me bcos of misunderstanding. Left me bcos u luv me no more? Izzit true tat u really dun luv me? How have I treated u? How did I luv u? Was it really all my fault? Did I cause out everything? I want you and I need u. Am i giving you any pressure? Am i not suppose to rely on you? I want you not as a frenz. I want you as my love, my lao gong, my dear. Only in this way, I can say that I love you. so tat I can still care more than a frenz. You didnt allow me to do so. Memories are all that I left. Thinking of you is all I can do. Sometimes I wonder if you still think of me and yet I wake up and realize you never did. I cant understand why my tears keep falling. Why do I have to cry for someone so unworthy like you. Everyone tells me you are not worth my tears, you were so wrong to leave me and its your lose to leave me. Why did you break all those promises? Why does love have to hurt? Why did you choose to let me go? Why didnt you stop me? I am full of questions without answers..

I tried so hard to act as if I dun care, as if I am happy as if I am not sad anymore but when im alone.. I find myself craving for you. We used to have something special that made me feel that we will be together forever but how can it end so soon? It is just 2 years. It is so short for forever. I waited for 2 years and shall I go on waiting? I dont know how to let go, cos my heart hold on to u so tightly. I love you more than words can say. You mean more than the world to me. Maybe someday I will learn to let go and maybe someday you will realize tat love is not a game. The time will come when you realize how much u had hurt me, how much I cried, how I feel and on tat very day, you will realize tat it was my heart that u broke..

You stand such an important position in my heart. I never ever erase you away from my mind. All that I noe, all that I did was to wait and just wait. The love that we once had, oUr memories that I will never forget. Till now, memories with you still stays in my heart, my mind. Why did you left me with all the pain and hurts? No matter wat you do, no matter how many times you had hurt me, I will always forgive u. I rather believe in you than what others had said. I always believe that you would not lie to me. Even if yOu lied, you also had your reason behind. I can understand. I really can. Just bcos you mean so much to me and I really put in my whole heart to believe and tRust yOu. Till now, im still confuse of why did we break up. Everytime I thought of it, I will always feel that I am the one at fault. I did not make the effort to clarify with yOu. Even though you mistaken me, I just bare everything by myself. I did not want you to feel hurt or bad. I believe you agree with me that both of us were at fault. Why did we ended up like this? You got your right to fall for another one. So do i. But I tried so hard to move on, I still cant get you out of my head. Whenever I know that you were attached, my heart will be broken into pieces again. I took so long to fixed it all by myself again and again. I got no idea do i still stand any position in your heart, but i know no matter what, no one will ever replace your position in my heart. After all, you made me changed sO much! Memories are now kept in my heart. I lock it up. The next time I view it, I hOpe I will view it with you again.

I got to get out of my imagination world. i got to gain back the trust i lost in myself. i got to find back my self confidence. Recall back. Seeing that you can actually do so much for the others, why not me? i got to tell myself tat im not the one you loved most. So wat if it's the lOngest reLationship? Im still not the one. Why am i always so silly to feel that i will be the one you loved most? Yes. It's true that you also did alot for me, but compare to them? I gave you the lesser hurt and pain. I love you so much that i cant bare to see you suffer? Whenever i feel that you had suffered so muCh for the others, do you know my heartache too? You are crying, so do i. i cRy with you.

I dont have th courage to call you. dont have the courage to say i miss you. neither do i have the courage to say i love you.

The tears doesnt stop flowing, the heart is still bleeding.
But this is what i deserve, to be broken and left unmended.
Exactly the way i made you feel..
To cry yourself to sleep, to feel only pain
The only emotion that i now keep
What was once reality
Is now but a scene in my dreams
Cos i've lost you now
I'll lose you forever
But in my dreams i see us both together
For as long as the stars stay amidst the night sky
When the sun lifts my eyes
Dreams become deceptive and cruel
Dont want to be deceived by my imagination
Dont want to have the comfort of seeing your face
Only when i'm asleep
Coz i want to be with you for all eternity
So let me sleep forever, dont wake me..

I guess right now at this moment, it's too late
That somehow my prayers won't be answered and things won't go my way. My wounded heart has been hurt time and time again. I've been too depressed and miserable in such great unbearable pain.

I just need a chance to say that I'm really terribly sorry about it. That even though it's too late, I'm still reluctant to give this up and not even a little bit. This matter just drags on, and I just don't know how to hang on. I'm so lost by the fact that you're not around to have me going on. Isn't there just some hope and love left in you? Perhaps we can be together again to have things renewed. You mean just so much to me all this while so I'm trying very hard, To be someone unique to you and that in your heart I own an important part.

I can't fake the way I could be for..
I hate you but I love you mOre then I hate you.
I can't stop thinking of you it's true..
but everything is over now.

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:54:00 PM

fAnn and mAinez

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:39:00 AM

Friday, March 04, 2005

am home very early. i reach around 440pm! darling mei accompany me home.. COOL!!

well.. super tired now but i still wana blog first.

went to school as usual.. though super in holiday mood, yet i still attend school. i am a guai student! ahem!

went to tiong for mac breakfast. yum yum. and im so full till now. i skipped my lunch and dinner.. not good i know, but im too full to eat anything else. had fun playing and gossiping with gal and jessica. i told them about the disgusting jam thingy! ahaha. make meiyun wana vomit.. [some private topic between us ya!]

lao gong came to look for me during my break. had fun playing around and i just love the way he care and sayang me. so sweet. heex!!

anyway, meet ling after sch at far east. she accompany me home and we talk a lot. i miss vOn!! wonder when will we meet up again.. hmmmMmm.. i miss those days sia.

jOhn just fetch ling home.. im all alone at home now.. keep playing the same song, "wang bu liao"! it's really nice ya. memories are sweet right? i miss my ex. i miss those days in school and with my ex. =x

watching 'closer' later. meiyun said tat it's nice so wana go watch too. but tat stupid GV booking line is not working. i cant book tickets. most prob will go down and buy bah.. hmmm.. waiting for mummy to buy something light for me to eat. cant have heavy meal. i wana pei dear eat later. =)

am tired.. shall get some rest bah.. yAwnz..

i miss you.

ANGEL_scribbled * -7:05:00 PM

WANG BU LIAO by Shi Wen Bin.

ANGEL_scribbled * -7:03:00 PM

Thursday, March 03, 2005

this is the disgusting uncle i mention!! [@ lucky plaza]

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:59:00 PM

me and my short term memory!

im bored too.. so i took the test too.. don't mind me.. im bad in language.. therefore.. im just oddly intermediate..

i really thinks that i have short term memory. i nearly forgot what i did today and yest.

*thinking..

*thinking..

oh ya! remembered.

wednesday [02/03/05]

firstly, i just remember that it's my anniversay with my ex. If we did not break, it would be our 5 years and 1 month anniversay. wah! indeed.. time flies ya. Though we break for about 3 years le, yet im still missing him. Guess he's leading a good life now.. shall not disturb his "peaceful life"!

anyway, back to school. everyone in school is feeling so sleepy. we just wana SLP! no work! gal and i just slack. Simply no mood at all. lao gong came to look for me. drag him to town with gal and me. played pool at lucky. FUNNY STUFF happened.

There's this uncle in his 40s.. bring a "woman" [who look like a maid] to play pool. their table to is near to us. at first, we thought he must be some pro who dare to teach "his" woman. but after looking at how his start the game and how he teach the woman.. all of us felt so CMI!! [cannot make it!] Apart from this, he is a di-ko-pei!! he stares at me and gal. gal is wearing short skirt and im wearing tank top. HE JUST KEEP BIO-ING HOPING TO SEE SOMETHING! i took the pic of him. shall post it later! I hope the uncle dig his nose until it bleed! [some private jokes that close one will know!] Attention to everyone.. please bring your own cue if you are going to have any pool session at lucky "hot shot". Cues there are full of nose shit. =x

Enough of that idiotic uncle. Went over to hmv.. shopped for awhile before gal and i went back to school. lao gong need to pei his jie to nuh. I really enjoy lao gong's company. How i wish he will pei me forever!! k.. i know im asking for too much! but lao gong.. I LOVE YOU!! ahaha.. =x

after school went to holland v to buy my necklace and i bought a scarf too.. nice but mummy say not nice.. sadded!! headed home after dinner.. tired!! just damn tired!!

thursday [03/03/05]

went to sch as usual.. been busy the whole day but i forgot why le. anyway, never mind.

went off early to meet darling mei. rush to meet her at bugis, at the same time, accompany baby for lunch and waiting for her to finsh work. talk a lot with ling and meanwhile, we shopped ard for cheap tie. THERE'S NO CHEAP TIE! maybe i shall get a nice one for dear bah.. shall not mind abt the price. actually im not the one who mind, dear was the one! =X ling suppose to pei me until baby end work, but she abandon me when her beloved bf came to fetch her.. alrite.. left me all alone in bugis waiting for baby.. hmm.. nvm.

people do change isnt it? ling told me that she changed a lot and it's true that she changed a lot. she cannot be unreasonable anymore. cannot anyhow throw temper anymore. sometimes she cant even decide for herself. but well, as long as she is happy with everything she has now, i guess the changes is good for her? =)

me.. im still the same old me. unreasonable, bully, stubborn, bad temper, want things to go my way.. maybe i might change one day too? but guess.. it will be damn difficult ya! though i know i need to give in at times, but my stubborn character just dun allow me to do so. TOO BAD den..

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!! guess wat? i saw Fann Wong! I like her ever since she step into the media industry. I TOOK PIC WITH HER!! shall upload soon too!! wah.. super happy sia.. thx baby for bringing me to the coffee shop for dinner!! food is nice! but the best thing is bumping into Fann Wong!! COOL!!!!! oh my.. im still in super hyper mood.. -_-

Hong Shen helped me in photoshop. his selecting skill is great. shall learn from him tml. well, im changing my template soon. Now just started creating the background. heex.

been listening to the song by Shi Wen Bin again and again. the title is Wang Bu Liao. remind me of my ex. but who cares. I love the song and it's meaningful. Shall intro to my ex instead. hiakz..

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:54:00 PM

Oddly Intermediate

You scored 73% Beginner, 86% Intermediate, 75% Advanced, and 66% Expert!
You have a good understanding of intermediate level commonly confused English words, getting at least 75% of the intermediate level questions correct. The puzzling part of your test result is the fact that you only answered 75% or less correct in the beginner section. Fascinating.
Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!

For answers to the Beginner section only (the first ten questions),
visit my blog: http://shortredhead78.blogspot.com/.

I will post the answers to the other questions as soon as possible.

Hey! If you liked my test, send the link to your friends. They don't need to be OkCupid members to take it.

The Commonly Confused Words Test
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=14457200288064322170

Test statistics:
Compared to users who took the test and are and in your age group:
100% had lower Beginner scores.
100% had lower Intermediate scores.
100% had lower Advanced scores.
100% had lower Expert scores.
With respect to Beginner, users aged 55 to 59 scored highest.
With respect to Intermediate, users aged 55 to 59 scored highest.
With respect to Advanced, users aged 55 to 59 scored highest.
With respect to Expert, users aged 55 to 59 scored highest.

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:48:00 PM

lao gong and me!! we are acting cute.. dun mind ya.. ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -6:38:00 PM

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

i admit tat im fat. [me, mei, bee, qi jie & ying jie]

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:39:00 AM

the replies.

ade: yesh dearie.. i noe you are my great supporter!! ahaha.. why moe sux?? btw.. congrate for achieving good garde for O's!! =) hUgz..

liting: alrite.. i got no chance to ask for ur pic.. ahaha.. so you wana send me ur nicest pic? email to me den!! im changing template again.. ahaha.. =x

cinz: yaya.. i will ganbatte!! but wen i die... ppl who cry will be those who really care abt me.. and they are sad over my death.. i will feel bad.. but by time.. it's too late to "regret dying"! sometimes.. it's juz something i cant wish for rite?

joe: hey!! ya lor.. long time no see!! still sort of enjoying.. but i tink the upcoming days.. im not going to enjoy it.. coz projects will be coming up.. STUDIES!! STRESS!! ahaha..

i wasted my time going for test today? i duno how to ans tat essay qns!! irritating.. so.. i finish my mutiple choice and leave straight away without touching on the essay qns!!

dear fetched me after test.. went to eunos for interview.. had fun playing ard wif dear of coz!! so i got my job.. it's sales again.. nth much to do.. i juz have to open my mouth and sell things.. $5/hr + commission.. not bad la.. so i agreed to work.. somemore.. it's part time job.. i shld start saving up le.. but first.. i gotta earn money!! instead of spending money going out on sat and sun.. i shall work and get money! yeah!! =)

think.. tat's gonna be tiring.. but nvm la.. i still wana work.. dear actually dun allow me to work de.. coz he scared tat i will tire myself.. but nvm la.. i will manage my time well.. enough rest as well as work!!

went kbOx again after the interview.. i get to hear my dear sing again.. with his awful voice.. but to me.. his voice made me slp.... im lyk a baby slpin on his lap.. anyway.. i juz slp for awhile la.. din waste my dear's money to slp there.. coz i noe he juz enjoy my singing.. rite? im his angel you know.. juz not shy lor.. heex.. home sweet home after K... tired.. but fun.. no quarrels.. no argument.. juz talk.. communicate.. exchanged mindset.. a pleasant outing... =)

ai shi bu xu yao shou chu kou de..... ke shi.... wo hai shi yao shou... WO AI NI!!

special msg to ah gong:

dun be upset anymore alrite? i can be as bright as you wan me to be.. okie? heex.. no matter wat.. ur sun nu will be here for you.. dun worry so much ya.. maybe everything will be fine by tml.. i really feel tat you would not be ruin just like this lor.. they will give you wat you wan.. im sorry.. i cant help a single bit.. only can say something nice and nothing else.. if im the head.. i'll juz let you in uni directly la... but too bad.. im not lei.. how sad.. wen im the head den i inform you k? [alrite, im juz jokin!] but seriously.. dun tink so much k.. take a rest.. and see wat shall you do tml lor.. =) hUgz.. *im giving my dearest ah gong a big tight hUgz k..* if i can.. i will fly over to hUgz you and be ur guardian angel making sure tat you will have a good rest.. dReam of me.. and have a nice dream and slp tite alrite? =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:43:00 AM

Monday, February 28, 2005

why do gals have to suffer? sOb.. im suffering from terrible.. horrible.. stomach cramp!! SOB!! and it really hurts a lot.. im dying!!! cant even slp well for the whole night... cRies.. tired and PAIN!!

nvm.. shall treat it as my retribution for being too harsh.. i noe i have been too harsh.. i never thought of hurting anyone.. but guess.. i just did it indirectly.

for some reason.. i used to protect someone as much as i can. cant bear to reject.. cant bear to ignore him.. but now.. FOR SOME REASON.. i have to... it's not tat things change.. it juz tat no point.. i cant believe tat he can be plain lazy.. for not taking the effort to tell me.. for asking me to take initiative when i thought he is so interested in yr 1 gals? well... he said dun regret.. and ya... blame me again.. i noe im harsh..

anyway.. gosh.. i need a new flip flop... heex.. anyone wana buy for me? my size is 7!! ahaha.. =x nah.. shall shop ard and find something i lyk!!

miss darling mei alot.. wonder how is she now.. got so much to talk to her.. so much to discuss.. so much to exchange.. but guess she is busy with her exam and bf.. too busy for me.. sAdded!!

i need to slim down.. really need to slim down!! dun care!! muz slim down!! ahaha.. im too fat from the image i wan myself to be.......

alrite.. regarding my back.. conclusion is.. heavy lappy.. too many sit ups.. i cant believe tat my back is so fragile.. ahaha.. =x

ah gong wana bring me to romantic places!! ahaha.. yaya.. and we shall find one day to go den.. seriously.. i nv been to "romantic" places before.. how romantic can it be den? hmmm.. i wonder!! ahaha..

ever wonder.. if im gone juz lyk tis? as in at tis age.. at the very next moment.. an accident took my life.. who will cry for me? who will be really sad over my death? i tink by den, i will realise who really bother abt me.... but it's too late for me to "realise".

tagboard had been quiet.... hmmm... why no one tagging? nth to tag about? ahaha.. or shall i do something lyk ah gong?? anyone who visit my blog.. can kindly drop down a msg and let me noe tat you visited my blog? no matter i noe you or not... juz tag something? =D i will greatly appreciate it.. thx!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:57:00 PM

Sunday, February 27, 2005

i am a LIBRA

LIBRA FEMALE

You are noted for your grace, refinement and beauty as well as your repulsion to anything unattractive. You are meticulous in manner and dress and add a touch of elegance to all that surrounds you. Your goal is more to be admired by a man but if he is willing to boost your ego on a continuing basis you will show him how skilled you are at the art of lovemaking. You tend to prefer the artistic type of man, however your partner must also be highly lucrative in order to furnish you with the adornments that you require to keep you happy.

When it comes to compatible signs for you harmony is the most important factor to keep in mind. Without harmony you can't possibly survive.

LIBRA & ARIES: Polarity attraction. Shooting stars in the bedroom. Tension, however, at a mental level. It can work if you are both willing to compromise.

LIBRA & TAURUS: Not too bad as you both value the finer things in life. The Bull's possessiveness can bring about some problems for you however if the price is right you'll put up with a little control.

LIBRA & GEMINI: Intellectual connection. This relationship is much better left as a friendship. You both need a great deal of freedom to experience other people. If you both agree on ground rules right from day one it can last.

LIBRA & CANCER: This is not the best match. The moody Crab is just too difficult for you to handle. You need to surround yourself with positive individuals who will create a harmonious environment.

LIBRA & LEO: This is a good union, similar lifestyles, both hooked on sex. The Lion's dazzle, and your refined nature balances out quite nicely. Together you make an extremely nice looking couple.

LIBRA & VIRGO: No Way! The practical Virgoan will never satisfy your desires. You're better not to pursue this partner for any kind of a long term commitment.

LIBRA & LIBRA: This is not a bad connection, but boredom can be a definite risk as you will both expect to be entertained. Your lazy nature when it comes to domestic chores will also be a problem if you can't afford to hire help.

LIBRA & SCORPIO: The Scorpions' jealousy vexes the casual, harmonious nature that you possess. This is certainly not an alliance made in heaven and usually quite difficult for you to balance.

LIBRA & SAGITTARIUS: This is an auspicious relationship. The Archer's charisma and thirst for adventure will hold your interest. Your good looks and cultural knowledge will entice the Archer.

LIBRA & CAPRICORN: It's difficult for the Goat to accept your inactivity. Physically there is a powerful attraction between you, unfortunately it is seldom lasting.

LIBRA & AQUARIUS: This is a compatible coalition, you are capable of making love in the highest form. Your two of a kind, neither of you care about detail nor domestics.

LIBRA & PISCES: This is not usually lasting. The Fish is too confused and sensitive in nature that makes this connection a highly complicated combination. The end result can be devastating if you aren't careful.

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:57:00 PM

Changes

Extract from natalie's blog..

i still carn adapt to ta changes.
i still carn understand wat causes all these changes in ya.
it seemed to be so 'over-nite' kinda stuffs.
been wondering...do u actually still love me.
can u not treat me this wae.
i dun wana lose u.coz i love u.
n i felt so miserably lost n helpless.
deres so much i wana sae.
but ive gort no idea how to.
im so worried n afraid i'd say da wrong stuffs again.
causing u to leave me..once again...
do u feel da wae i feel.=(
i juz love u so much.i carn live without u.

If changes had to be made, than wat's the point of loving the one you choose to love?

why doubt each other's feeling when both of you are already a couple?

Being in a relationship, why feel miserable, lost and helpless?

Why afraid to say?

In a relationship, i believe in giving in and taking in.. as in.. give in to each other wen neccessary and take in the love from one another oftenly!

Love is only love when you know you only want the person you "love" to be happy and you don't really matter in the love equation.

As long as he/she's happy, this is love 'for himself', the way he sees it and feel it.

TOO often love brings an element of selfishness in, and that is not a good way of approaching love.

there's 2 kind of love..

one is more to friendship and kinship love..

one is more to relationship love..

if for you to choose.. which one will you want from me?

What is love?

Love is only that you yourself can describe and no one else. The world is just full of interpretations, and these interpretations can only misrepresent the true feelings you have bestowed upon that someone.

Sometimes you confuse yourself with the existence of love, but it is not only you who will be confused, as the person on the receiving end will probably feel the same way as you do. Love in most cases is like a mirror, it reflects and contours to the way you like it.

So be gentle to yourself, and your reflection will undoubtedly be closer than you can even imagine.

Everything is never too late, if you and i try.

Wait for the sweetest thing to happen.

Understand the things I say.
Don't turn away from me.
Understand what I've became.

I'm the only one who knows what I'm doing.

Does anyone cares?

No one can decipher what I mean today.

Until that day, someone will know it.

Wait for me.

I will give you the most priceless gift.

In the near future, you would know the meaning.

Everyone is imperfect.
Yet, in this world, there is always someone who loves you perfectly.
Cherish the love you own, the love which belongs to no one but you.

alrite.. im talking too much.. love and be loved.. which one will i choose?

i choose to be loved....

toward my ex....

I am still me.
the girl whom you once loved.
but i no longer need you love.
i just wanna be me.

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:48:00 PM

Friday, February 25, 2005

i skipped sCh again.. =x

a "funny" day i would say..

i.. or rather WE went out with someone tat ppl din expect tat he will go out with us..

qian cuo wan cuo.. duo shi kiwi de cuo!!

wake up early for sch.. i went to sch MYSELF. meaning taking bus and dad din fetch me! oh my.. im tired of walking down the slope!! SICK!!

anyway.. reached sch ard 8.29am. class look so empty.. air con not working.. the whole class only have 4 person for first meeting!! OH MY! how.... pathetic.. well, the moment i saw the "fac of the day", i regret coming to sch from tat very moment!!

jessica and i get so tired and keep gossip abt the fac. he's actually kee wai.. but we called him KIWI!! nice nick rite? anyway, mei yun came after we finished gossiping, and she saw kiwi.. she oso sian half ya..

BUT seriously.. boring.. really sian sia.. tat KIWI.. he can simply juz sit there and din say anything. neither did he explain or watever!! and the same scenario happened during the second meeting.. SIAN HALF SIA!

all of us have the thought of going off le lor.. "all of us" as in.. jessica, mei yun and i. at first, we really wanted to go off.. but jessica was rather hesitated about it. Therefore we keep dragging the time. The more we drag, the more meiyun and I dun wana stay. At first, we though of leaving without Jessica as she said tat she can join hong shen’s team. Den we gossip again and asked hong shen out too..

the conversation is lyk tis.

Mei yun: hong shen, ni yao bu yao qu?

Hong shen: har? aiya..

Jessica: wah.. if hong shen go, I will go oso!

Hong shen: [closing all the application and attempting to shut down his computer] orh.. okie lor!

Jessica, mei yun and I tio shocked sia.. we just stunned for tat moment lor. and everyone starts packing our stuff..

Jessica: wo shi ge jiang xin yong de ren. jiang dao zuo dao.

therefore, she went off with us too!!

as planned, we went to kbOx. the very first time i went with jessica and of coz hong shen! i guess.. we enjoyed ourselves alot.. pictures will be uploaded soon.. ahaha.. juz had a fun day with my dearest gal, guan yin ma and hong shen!! actually, outing with hong shen aint tat boring ya. as in or is it maybe.. the 3 gals are too talkative? hmm.. no idea.. but i really thinks tat everyone enjoyed!! =)

we went seperate ways after kbOx.. duh.. of coz i meet dear.. we had dinner at pasta mania AGAIN.. but i tink dear and i din enjoy the food coz it doesnt taste flesh. suppose to watch "white noise", but im too tired and mainly oso dun wish to waste dear's money, so i insist of not watching movie. we ended up walking ard town. buying lots of things and crap too much! meanwhile i oso get my broadband done. therefore, i will be having a new digital cam SOON!! yeah!! =D

im too tired to actually walk or talk.. so went home around 6+.. slp throughout the bus journey home.. lying on dear's shoulder.. he kissed my forehead and asked me to rest and maybe tat's why i slp throughout the journey ya.. or rather.. im pig la.. ahaha.. =x im too tired la.. no choice..

im home around 7+. dad praise me for coming home early. mum cooked dinner for me. i got little brother to play with. wat a HAPPY FAMILY ritE? home sweet home!! heex.. helped mummy to do some housework, watch channel 8, reply msg and juz enjoy life at home..

mei came home around 11+.. wah.. tat gong gong! mummy dun let her go for her CO event at toa payoh coz it ends at 10pm. but she insist of going yet duno how to return. mummy dun wana fetch her.. so she took a train home and wen she reached bukit batok, she DUN DARE to flag a cab home! therefore, i need to drag my dad out to fetch her from mrt station. this little sister of mine juz make me worry sia.. dun even understand.. why her sister is so "clever" and she is so gong gong!! hmMmmmmm.......

actually i just realised tat i had a bad hair day and my dressing sux tdy!! i juz anyhow take clothes out from my cupboard and wear it... din even comb ma hair before i come out.. oh no.. mei you xing xiang!!! -_-

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:58:00 PM

an educational outing

went out with ah gong yest.. wah.. an educational outing i would say.. and it's really a wonderful outing.

it had been some time ever since i went out with my guy frenz alone. normally will be lyk one whole big group.. wah.. i miss the feeling of sitting at a cafe for the whole evening talking and talking none stop.. heex.. anyway, back to yest, i tink im sort of blur in a lot of way. ah gong juz cannot tahan me wen i forget wat i wana say.. due to the side effect of the movie we had watch, i tend keep forgeting wat i wana say at the very next moment.

apart from tat.. i find tat i learn alot during this outing. as in topic tat is more to "adult". oh my.. i cannot hang ard with small KID anymore!! =X one word to say abt me.. "naive"! im juz "too innocent" for adult topic.. ahaha.. =X sound as if im some gong gong.. sitting in front of expert explaining the current "world change" in the world.. SHI JIE BIAN LE.. ren ye bian le..

maybe due to the fact tat most of the gals ard me are having the same concept as me, therefore i nv tot tat there's still lots of gals who are not having the same thoughts as my frenz and i. to be exact, im rather shocked. i nv knew tat the world is becoming so open? everything will change except "change" itself. tis is wat jessica enlighten me.. sound logical ritE?

anyway.. i tink a lot of ppl will read till gong gong.. let's stop this "adult" topic.. heex..

but i wana emphasize again.. the outing is WONDERFUL.. and i mean it ah gong!! ahem.. next tym shall be group outing with meiyun and ah ma.... and so on.. =) as in.. there's still lots of chances to go out together isnt it? cOOl..!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:00:00 AM

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

depRession

i steal.. from dearie's blog..

you changed. waiting, when i think of it, is pure nonsensical shit. wait wait wait wait wait for what? christmas??

waiting brings you a glimpse of hope. why?

this is because you wake up in the morning thinking of that person. thinking that one day he or she will return to you. and most of the time, (not always) the other party is having a hell of a good time with SOMEONE else. or worse still. alone. THINKING of SOMEONE ELSE. and the i wait for you to come back to me is just one sided wishful thinking that will never come true.

hence, i have deduced that waiting for someone is actually some sort of hypnotic spell you put YOURSELF under. and its called DELUSION. yes. delusion. do you think that waiting for someone unconditionally will really bring them back to you?

i beg to differ. it is only a small percentage of people who wait will get their old flame back by their side. then that, i'd have to say, would be a happy ending. but wake up wake up wake up. if your ex isint even feeling the way you do, cuz he or she left first in the relationship, suggested the break, played on you, whatever shit, HE OR SHE WOULDNT EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT YOU'RE WAITING.

humans can be such moronic creatures. yes. welcome to the dark dark world everyone. they complain to the world that they need love when they ARE ALREADY being loved by someone. why then, do they make so much noise? that is because they just dont see or SIMPLY REFUSE TO SEE or ARE PICKY. in worse cases. they just think YOU'RE ANNOYING.

see what i mean? its delusion.
and im deluding my self. are you coming back? no.

tree leaf wind. who am i, who are you, who is that person? in MY case leaf left because of wind's pursuit. NOT cuz tree didnt ask her to stay. and me. rooted to the ground. watching you being swept away by different gusts of wind... yet helplessly standing here. trying to get attention but failing. im a dying tree. my only leaf is gone.

i... pursue for true love.. waiting is the only element to find true love. dearie has not found the right one yet.. therefore, it's not consider true love.

makes me think ya.. in a relationship.. if he/she did love you before, you should not regret and blame anyone if the relationship fails.

i used to blame my ex a lot.. but in the end.. the more i hate him.. the more i feel tat i love him and need him by my side.. although i know it clearly tat im not the one at fault.. he was the one tat invited the 3rd party into our relationship.. but i dun blame him anymore..

at tat point of time.. my life.. my aim is juz waiting and waiting.. thinking that one day he will return to you. I also know that he is having a good time with another gal not me. and the i wait for him to come back to me is just one sided wishful thinking that will never come true. BUT no matter wat.. i did wait.. it's not a hypnotic spell i put myself under.. i really think tat waiting for someone unconditionally will really bring him back to me.

and YES.. he did came back to me before.. and left again.. I know he had been making use of me coz he know tat i really love him lot.. but again.. i made me came back to me and allow him to leave again.. maybe.. im silly.. maybe i shld not let him go again.. at tat point of time.. my mind is empty.. loving him is the first priority and second was seeing him happy with everything he has..

for me.. my leaf left,

I din ask him to stay..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:11:00 AM

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

A question to ponder..

Does love fades?

If you were to ask me, I would say no. True love will never fade. True love will never be gone due to the held up in time. If it does, then it is not love in the first place. True love is not like any flower, which will wilt and fade away within a few months, weeks or even days. True love will never fade within years, months, weeks or days.

If feelings were to fade, then it does not exist at all in the very first place. Love can withstand any obstacle. Love needs tonnes of understanding, compromises and patience to come far. To me, nothing ever changes. If there seems to be changes, it is in the nature of the things and people. It is just that we realized too late. They did not change. It is in them.

Perhaps try to cool down and think about it wins over being impulsive hands down. Instead, diminish that burning fire in you and solve problems rationally. You would not bear to lose someone dearly forever, do you? Give both parties some time to figure out.

Love can withstand the test of time. Love is worth the wait.

Many around us are waiting, waiting for their loved ones to come back to them.

Why do they choose to wait?

Because waiting is beautiful. Because there is a glimpse of hope. It is better than giving up forever and losing him/her forever.

If you have someone you really love and could not be with them due to any circumstances, you can hold on gently without any word of mouth. He or she can feel it, if they hold on to the same conviction as you.

One day, you will be together with them again. One day, you will realize the person whom you have once forsaken is your true love. One day, your true love will return when it triumphs over the test of love.

You will be loved.

I thought I was different.

I thought I was a strong girl.

But now, I admit I'm weak.

I concede defeat.

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:32:00 AM

Monday, February 21, 2005

for vAnz.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:05:00 AM

for meiyun.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:05:00 AM

my necklace.. and i love it alot alot!! mUackz!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:03:00 AM

my present from dear for Valentine's Day!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:02:00 AM

Silence is because of Tolerance

the replies.

steph: i oso feel ur concern all round the time ya.. i'll be happy.. same to you. aiai.. there's actually another tag board in my blog. see the ending of every post.. there's this Indulged(0). you click on it.. it's another tagboard where you can tag longer tag.. =) the tagboard shld not be having so much problem lyk chatterbox ya..

ade: it's okie.. i dun mind.. really owe my dearie a BIG sorry.. im sorry tat im not there wen you are down. im sorry for not being free for you.. im so sorry.. i'll msg you k.. =)

ferny: WHERE GOT DAO!!! im busy!! busy busy giving out flyers.. ahaha.. pai seh la.. i did took notice of you k.. juz tat really too busy till i cant say hi or tok to you la.. but i did smile lor.. ahem.. dun lyk tat la.. love love k.. oh ya.. wen are you going to date me out aR? ahaha.. =X

vAnz: i love my background music too.. heex.. i'll send to you alrite..

jessica: heex.. thx thx.. i'll post more meaningful thingy wen i got "ling gan"!!

alrite.. my tagboard is getting noisy!! i got things to reply.. YEAH!! ahaha..

at this very moment.. i gotta announce something.. SERIOUSLY.. i miss my darling.. my sun zi and my dear ALOT!! for duno wat reason.. i juz miss them alot alot.. *sObz..

k.. i did something interesting for vAnz and meiyun.. vAnz lyk it.. hopefully meiyun lyk it too.. =) will post up later ya..

wen to help out in sch open hse.. helped kuan liang to give out flyers.. ahaha.. meiyun and i juz enjoyed ourselves being mistaken as sec sch kid.. and go around di siao ppl frm rp.. they actually explain the course to us and after tat.. we said tat we are student.. ahaha.. they all pengz sia.. =x opps.. gal's idea.. not mine.. ahaha.. actually we went to help out for the sake of CE points sia.. heex.. but we are consider hardworking le.. at least we din throw away the flyers.. instead, we give out every piece we have!! COOL!!

not forgetting to mention.. I SAW JAMIE YEO.. and i took pictures with her!! COOL... will post up soon too!! heex.. we juz get so HIGH wen we saw her.. liming, gal and i juz keep taking pic with her before she start working. RP invite her to intro RP to the sec sch kids.. ahahaha..

Hide and Seek is a nice show!! catch tat movie with dear on fri.. it's not a scary movie.. not a ghosty movie.. the ending is wat you nv expect!! WATCH IT WATCH IT!! =)

my health is really deterioting. my back starts aching for duno wat reason again.. this problem had been occuring quite often for this past few months.. wat happened to me? it is my back or something internal?

i knock my head against the fridge yest. i wasnt aware tat my head actually went all the way in to find something.. and i juz stand up without realising looking.. therefore, i hit my head with very great impact.. oUch.. pAin!! =( *cRies.

Silence is because of tolerance. who can ever tolerate my princess character?

I finally realised something AGAIN.

Being loved is better than loving someone who doesn't bother to reciprocate that love.

No matter how beautiful or perfect a person is, a person who doesn't love us, is nothing but just a dream. We all don't want to suffer the fate of loving someone who don't love us, do we?

This applies to everyone...

im being asked to blog abt this small boy AGAIN.. why am i alwayz assigned to such a task? alrite.. anyway.. this small boy still doesnt grow up.. full of vulgarities while talking to gal.. or maybe im not a gal to him.. anyway.. he juz slapped me on msn tonight.. no one ever slapped me on msn.. tat's make him the first one.. he had been so gay recently.. i guess he really love shaowei alot.. bear in mind.. is A LOT!!! apart from tat.. i guess he is in love with nic yeo too.. he juz get so high wen he trashed him in pool.. cRazy!! he actually wana trash me too.. this shows tat he is also in "love" with me as he so wanted to trash me.. therefore.. conclusion is.. HE IS SUPER FLIRT!! =x He is super bias towards beng and lian.. which also means tat he is bias over his ex gf?? well.. no matter how much i explain tat some bengs and lian are not bad.. he still dun wish to understand and assume tat all are bad.. BIAS isnt it? wen i said.. im very concern abt my sisters too.. and he said im a lian using BUTTER KNIFE to fight? alrite.. sound a little.. offended.. by watever.. i shall not be petty.. beside tat.. he "expect" me to blog something lyk, "i'm dying to be with u for the rest of my life serving and loving u..".. everyone shld noe.. i'll nv blog such thing.. and i WUN!! *bleahx

a long post i consider... =)

gonna get some rest le..

if not.. dear gonna nag at me le.. -_- night ppl..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:30:00 AM

Thursday, February 17, 2005

lOve is to cherish!

Love doesn't come by everyday.

Cherish what you have now,
the person who loves you most now.

Grab it and don't let go of him/her.

I don't want anyone to regret,
as everyone revolving me are regretting.

you may feel he/she is a pest in your eyes now.
Not until one day you lose him/her,
then you will feel the surging pain, intense.

EVERYONE often learn to cherish too late,
including you and me, everyone reading this.

Start to cherish the one who loves you whole-heartedly now,
or one day, you may regret if you lost that kind of love.

CHERISH.

Lastly,

always learn to be optimistic about the love you are holding.
As optimism can make a love successful,
whereas being pessimistic will only break a love and eventually just ruin everything.

Always hold the good memories in your heart.

Never ends.

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:40:00 PM

fiRst dAy of oPen hOuse

the replies.

liting: yeapx.. i finally changed!! =) ur turn soon?

julie: haR? duh.. im not attractive at all.. but thx anyway.. =)

ade: ya.. it's quiet.. dun you tink so?? ahem..

ling: alrite alrite.. compare to urz.. mine is a little better..

went for open hse.. gal and i helped kuan liang to give out flyers.. can say.. we are 2 siao char bos.. going ard the school giving ppl paper. funny!! but fun day i feel.. =)

after tat, went to play pool with gal and dear.. but we laughed a lot throughout the whole day..

mum cooked dinner tonite.. so i gotta be home for dinner.. luckly din go out with ah gong.. if not my mum's sudden decision of cooking dinner will make him disappointed again.. *phew* well.. all i can say is another time bah.. we go out another time alrite?

tired!! coz i din have enough rest the night before.. was busy doing gal's bg for her blog.. hopefully she will lyk it.. =)

I've learnt something.

That I feel that it is very true for everyone.

A person who leaves first in the relationship will always think that he do not love the other party as he is not upset for the breakup.

Why?

Because he leaves first, he don't feel the hurt.
He is still loved.
Whereas the person who stays and clings on will always be more hurt.

Very long later,
only when he lost the love she had for him,
he will realise he actually love her.

Very long later...
It may take even years.

ANGEL_scribbled * -10:14:00 PM

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

*-- ah ma & mE --*

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:46:00 PM

____`` ` ah gOng & sUn nU ` ``____

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:42:00 PM

i forced ah gong to pose the same as his pic!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:32:00 PM

tAgbOard is too quiet..

the reply.

ade: dearie.. not crazy la.. it's better to got over her.. isnt it?? at least you are happier den before i guess.. =)

tagbOard is so quiet... no one nagging.. no one disturbing.. no one commenting.. no one gossiping.. nth to reply.. -_- bOring..

in class now.. gal and jessica busy finding and reading resources.. i finish decorating the slides.. waiting for their information to piak in..

BORING.. TIRED!!

dad fetch me to sch and i juz slp for the whole journey from home to sch.. tis explain how tired am i..

sch network sux.. go into any site need at least 5 mins!! sUx to the core... i tink rp forgot to pay bill sia.. =x

msn oso got problem.. cannot chat.. cannot view sites.. cannot do anything.. wah kaoz.. juz boring lor... *yAwnz

"being in a relationship is a dating phase.. to test.. and find out if tat person is the one.. tats why i am always on the look out for possiblities.. dating is a searching game.. we slowly search n try.. till we find the best one and most suitable.."

agree?? a relationship is really just a dating phase? wen you are attached.. you still can look out for possiblities?? i duno.. but sound kind of true..

but i need meet with such situation before.. im alwayz stick to my stead.. i wun look out for other possiblities.. even if there will be a day, wen im attached and i realise tat another guy treats me better.. i'll still go for my bf.. tat's my thinking bah.. alwayz stay faithful.. =)

well.. the only thing that matters is just following your heart and eventually you'll finally get it right. =)

took some pics at ah gong's place on sunday.. shall post it up ya.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:46:00 AM

Monday, February 14, 2005

im hAppy with whatever i hAve!!

the replies.

steph: aiai.. haPPy Valentine's dAy too!! wish you stay everlasting with ur dearest lao gong k.. muAckz.. love ya alwayz..

ade: dearie.. i duno where to get mtv code lei.. i nv find before.. =) cny makes you so happy aR? weird.. ahaha..

i had a tiring day.. but no matter wat.. my V day was never a lonely me!! =D

i got roses.. i got presents.. im juz there collecting present on V day as if it was my bday.. ahaha.. =X hAppy with the presents!! i got a diamond necklace from dear.. the one i super lyk!! and my longed wanted CK eternity.. ahem.. HAPPY!!

i shall blog more tml.. as im super tired now.. heex.. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:59:00 PM

hAppy Valentine's Day!!

the replies.

vAnz: hAPpy Valentine's Day!!!! =) muAckz.. lOve ya aLwayz..

ade: dearie!! happy Valentine's day!! thx for ur voice mail.. but im too tired to wait till 12am for everyone wishes!! =x hope you faster get a gf ya!! =) btw.. why suddenly so happy aR??

julie: orh.. icic... hmmm.. wat you wana noe abt me??

winne: geeky!! i miss you too!!! mUAckz.. hapPy vAlentine.. miss taking pics with you!!

ash: kor ah.. you busy hor? im waiting for ur msg lei.. wen meeting up? haPpy Valentine's day!! i wan da sao da sao..!! =x

teddi: ahaha.. im not a babe.. but i oso wish myself to be nian nian yue lai yue mei li.. =x same to you.. haPpy new yr ya!! =)

michelle: JIE!!! oh my.. u haven forget abt me.. thx god for answering my pray!! =x im wishing my jie not to forget abt me.. and yeapz.. jie tagged me!! yEAh!! =) muAckz.. i Love yOu lOtz!! hUgz..

limingz: nu er!! happy new yr!! ahaha.. get ang bao frm daddy k.. =x.. muAckz.. love love!!

aKa: hAppy new yr!! and hAppy Valentine's day!! =) i still cannot give ang bao la... ahaha.. den where is my ang bao?? =x

so who's the first to wish me??

it my dearest lao gong!!! thx lao gong.. HAppY Valentine's Day too!!! muAckz.. i LOve yOu lOtz TOO!!!! =) hUGzz... followed by my dearie... den i msg so many ppl wen i woke up.. ppl lyk ah gong, gal, vAnz, dear...... everyone got my wishing!! yeAhz!!

dear called in the early morning!! juz wake up to wish me happy valentine's day.. SO SWEET!! and i emphasize.. SO SO SO SWEET!!! =) it's lyk hard for him to wake up in the morning.. juz to wish me happy valentine's day and telling me how much he love me.. i felt so loved!! =) heex.. *blUsh*

my new yr had been busy!! BUSY!! went all around the whole spore sia.. but i tink.. the further i went was... MARINE PARADE!! cab fare super ex sia.. but nvm.. i enjoyed myself still..

went ah gong hse at marine parade.. kitty was there too.. and his frenz started coming one by one around 2+... im the earliest!! took funny pics.. and oso played mahjong.. tok crap.. FUN!! =)

go off around 330... den go around collecting ang baos.. ahaha.. so funny.. dear juz bring me all around ya.. =x

no time for all the details.. juz roughly blog something can le ritE? ahahah.. =x

oh my.. i pity someone.. no new skirt on new yr.. so sad.. beside tat.. she need a watch too.. she has no shi jian guan nian.. ahem.. gal shld understand wat i mean ya.. ahaha.. =x

aiyoyo... im so bored now.. need to go out go out!! i wana go buy things for my dear, lao gong, ah gong........... so many things to buy!! ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:12:00 AM

Thursday, February 10, 2005

[ lao gong & lao po ]

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:48:00 AM

HAPPY CNY!!

the replies

ling: darling!! I LOVE YOU LOTS TOO!! HAPPY NEW YR!! =) it's okie.. we shall meet another day den.. friday will be great!! *hint hint* miss you alot worz..

ade: dearie!!! yes yes!! miss you miss you!! thx thx.. i love my template too!! i got in from some website.. ahaha.. seriously.. i forgot wher le.. =X looking forward to ur upcoming template worz.. jia you!! =) happy new yr!!

shar: HAPPY NEW YR TOO!! =D

Julie: you are?? why wana noe me?? or do i look familiar to you??

anonymous: welcome welcome.. you have been visiting my site.. but i duno urz.. mind to allow me visit uRz too?? =) yeapx.. happy new year too!!

kris: thx.. i'll link you up too!! happy new yr!! =)

alrite.. i have been wishing ALL happy new yr!!

once again.. HAPPY CNY TO ALL!!

i wish the best for my dearest frenz.. hopefully they will collect as many ang bao as they can!! =)

wish lao gong will jian fei cheng gong!!

wish darling mei will be happy alwayz!!

wish sun zi will stay loving with shu hui!!

wish dear will be satisfield with her upcoming job!!

wish mei yun, vAnz and jessica will continue to be ai mei and be everlasting with their bfs..

wish my dad and mum will win lot lot of money!!

wish mei and di will study hard!!

wish aiai will be happy and stay cheerful no matter wat!!

wish ashley kor faster find a da sao for me!!

wish all my jies dun forget abt me and continue to teng me!!

wish ah gong will love me more more more!! coz im his guai sun nu!!

wish dearie will find her rite one soon!!

there's so much to list.. oh my.. i juz wish everyone the best alrite!!

had fun tdy.. collecting ang baos.. mahjong.. mahjong.. and more mahjong.. gossip gossip and more gossip.. fashion and more fashion.. my cousins are so CUTE!! lOve them all!! =)

duno how to go into details.. but juz one word.. FUN!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:26:00 AM

Sunday, February 06, 2005

bUgis is mEssy!!

the replies.

vAnz: ahem.. im not married yet.. why get ang bao frm me?? ahaha.. i shall get from you and guai pei pei sia.. =x

jessica: yaya.. my new design!! =) i upload my pic using RP server and PhotoBucket.

anonymous: the pictures as in the slide show ma?? you may find the codes here.. VideO my template is childish? ahaha.. alrite.. i have another point of view. recently view a lot on cartoons and anime. find tat their design is really nice.. therefore i got my idea from them. pink is the colour i lyk. black too. so obviously it will be a little overdo. but anyway, thx for ur comments. =)

ling: you din meet me up.. -_- sadDed!! *miss miss*

shopped at bugis again.. wah.. kind of messy ya! lots of ppl.. lots of shop here and there.. MESSY!! i can lost my way there if im not familiar with bugis sia! anyway. i bought a lot of stuff. 2 more suits of cny clothes!! yUppies!!

mummy help me hang up my puzzles.. SO NICE!! lOve it so much.. i dun mind if any make ff8 puzzle for me again sia.. =x

tired.. din slp for the whole day.. super tired.. *yawnz..

missing someone as i listen to spirited away theme song. we watched the movie together.. maybe tat's why bah.. i dun mean to dAoz him.. but i duno how to tok to him.. i duno how to go back to the past.. as mei yun said, wat's gone will be gone forever. i dun wish to be harsh and i noe i wun be harsh. dun ask me why.. i cant dun care abt him. i noe it all along.. we wun suit to be together. but in the end.. why din i get hurt without even realising tat he might be playing all along? gal was right tat he dun understand me.. he duno wat i wan. he alwayz said tat i shld noe wat to do, i shld noe wat i did and i gotta reflect on myself and blame myself even if sometimes, i feel tat im not in the wrong. wat i did was for his own good yet he alwayz mistaken my intention. end up is only quarrels and hurting one another. gal asked me not to bother about him anymore.. will i? why am i alwayz the one getting all the lecture? ever since things went wrong between us, wat i did was only avoiding.. i noe it clearly tat i cant avoid forever yet i find no reason NOT to avoid. wat's the reason behind my stupid act..?

- i duno -

need to get some rest le... if not.. i'll be thinking too much.. -_-

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:08:00 PM

more ANG BAOS pls!!

the replies.

anonymous: ya lor.. no more mtvs.. put up a lot of mtvs until i duno wat to put le.. frenz have been asking me to change template.. so i change lor.. =)

ling: wher got copy la..?? shHHh.. im really IMPERFECT ma.. as in, im not wat i wana become now.. i still wish to be slimmer.. =x alrite.. i'll inform you about chatting session.. dun forget, im a busy girl too worz.. but i'll alwayz make time for you!! my dearest, i love you!! =) my blog is nice ritE? i design one for you some other day alrite??

ASh: KOR!! ya la.. HOLIDAYS is here!! so happy about it.. =) wen is ur bday?? i duno about it lei.. =x haiz.. wat a useless mei of your.. but i dun mean it de.. coz you din tell me. SOB!

zippy: thx thx!! you have a nice skin too!! =)

nick512: hey BHB!! =x oPps.. ya la.. club 3 close down le.. and now den i noe!! ahaha.. still got RUSH lor.. underage oso can go in.. tOotz.. anyway! HOLIDAY le.. enjoy ur holidays alrite.. =)

FerNy: stupid KA CHING!! you duno who am i still shout so loud aR? ahem!! sadded ar.. i dun wana date with you le.. hmmppff..!! =P

steph: no worries.. im alwayz here ya.. =) love you too!!

CNY is coming!!

ang bao ang bao!! i wan ang baos!! short of cash recently.. ppl pls give me more ang baos!! im still a kid!! =x

im going to apply UOB visa mini!! yuPpie!! guess dad will apply it for it! im so excited over it!! oh my.... the card just look so chio.. =x

i bought another top for CNY!! guess im the one who spent the most in CNY clothes. =x i dun mean it.. but i juz buy watever i lyk and look nice in it la.. ahaha.. =x

juz finish dye-ing my ah yi hair.. hmm.. i trim my nails and oso file my nails.. im so prepared for cny!! ahaha.. opps.. not yet.. i haven polish my hair.. ahem.. =)

there's still so much to do sia.. lucky i bought watever i need le.. maybe going out later to buy the skirt i lyk at bugis..

wah.. i suddenly realise tat there so much to buy in bugis now.. and the price is rather reasonable.. so i shall shop more there!! =)

went out with mei and sihui yest.. bought watever they need.. and i guess they are so happy to shop with me.. ahaha.. oh my.. i can say, going out with them is so expensive.. i spent lyk 100+ for juz one shopping trip.. i bought nothing but my mei bought everything she wanS!! -_-

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:06:00 PM

Saturday, February 05, 2005

tired!! -sAdded-

tired!! though i woke up rather late, im still tired!! -_-

woke up ard 2+pm today.. the first thing i did was to complete my template.

dear came over around 4+.. and i get myself ready and wen to town. missing ling so much.. so decided to meet her.. in the end, i din get to play pool & eat my pasta just bcoz i wana meet her and tok to her.. =)

ally was wif her.. they were shopping.. seriously.. i got a lot to say.. but guess.. no chance at all.. and she seems to be avoiding the topic im going to tell her.. well~ all i can say is.. as ur sister.. i only can advice you and not making any decision for you. if you choose to avoid it, den let it be. i dun wish you to change into another person. i oso dun wish you to be miserable. you should noe tat.. i'll feel sad ya! anyway.. watever you decide and do.. alwayz remember.. i'll stand by ur side forever.. =) i wish to see my darling gal stay happy and cheerful forever.

played lan game after meeting ling. the network sux. hang hang hang!! -_- quit playing not long later.. BORING!!

went down for pool game. BORING!! so many ppl lor.. waited and waited.. finally got table le.. but play for awhile, we went off le.. meet mei yun for awhile.. but she din wana go chiong.. so we went off without her..

it's been some time ever since i last visited MS.. i din even noe tat club III had close down. -_- we got no place to go. actually wanted to go angel or news room, but lesly underage.. so we can only go RUSH!! bOring.. i rot the whole nite sia.. techno makes me sleepy and some ppl there dance lyk shit sia.. yuCkz.. =x

dear nearly got into some fight juz now.. tat guy oso bo liao la.. bo tai bo ji go bang on ppl.. den i scolded him and tok to his frenz.. everything is settled!! bo liao lei.. how old le still fight here and there.. therefore.. i scolded dear too!!

so tired now.. shall not blog any longer.. i need to get some slp!! *yawnz

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:31:00 AM

Friday, February 04, 2005

MY NEW TEMPLATE!!

so happy about it.. my NEW TEMPLATE!! though not as perfect as the others'.. but i did put in effort to do it..

HAPPY!!!!!!

=)

i think there's more to edit.. hmmm.. i shall tink about it and try to enhance my template!! =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -3:24:00 PM

Thursday, February 03, 2005

the EVER best TEAM!!

FIRSTLY, happy tat tml will be the start of holiday!! so excited and looking forward to it from the past few weeks..

had animation module today. as jessica said.. SHIOK!! we came early and had a "new" team instead of the sucky team. we combined team with Chong Yee and Kuan Liang. so my team consist of Jessica, Zong Xian, Chong Yee, Kuan Liang and me!! =) cool rite? after so many weeks.. finally a team tat is able to present good work.. phew..

i was in charge of drawing the character today. As im drawing, I juz cant help it but to laugh and laugh and laugh.. jessica said tat im crazy.. so sad!! but if you were the one doing it.. wen you create the shape and compare with the original pic, wen you see the difference, you juz cant help it but LOL!

juz now kuan liang showed me 2 animation and i think it's cute and funny.. so i shall share it den. =)

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php

http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/anywhere.htm

shall mention about wat happened yest.. damn funny lor.. due to the fact tat mei yun, vanz and i were too tired, we tend to do silly things to keep us awake.. we were so damn di siao... and did quite alot of silly things.. ahaha.. something happening in the toilet!

went to holland v after sch.. searching high and low for the necklace i saw in LIME magazine. SO SAD.. no more stock. it will only come in after CNY.. so i gotta wait patiently.. =l

shopped at causeway point after tat. meet up with jay and lesly. played pool and have a lot of fun. =) ahaha.. no doubt.. lesly is really very cute and lame!! -_- gosh.. i got dui shou le..

really hope jay found his true love now. hope they will last.. if ever jay dui bu qi lesly.. i tink i will juz classify him under my list of BASTARD/BITCH!! ahem!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:49:00 PM

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

the replies.

cheryl yeo: so glad tat you remembered me!! ahaha.. i've been fine.. how about you? i linked you already.. =)

vAnz: OKIE OKIE!! gaming AGAIN!! but i wana play CS.. -excited- not really hooked now la.. BUT sooner or later lor.. oPPs.. =X

msg to aiai.

IM SO HAPPY!! my aiai remember me and wish the best for me!! =) knowing tat you are sad yet i cant do anything to help you. anyway, to me, you are alwayz a strong gal. muz hv confidence in urself and try to find out wat you wan. it mean alot to noe wat you wan. at least you can work towards it ya.. =) define ur doing. define ur feeling. define how strong you are.. define to be happy or sad. you aint useless. you are much cleverer den me! you will do well in studies if you work hard for it. no one have the right to look down on you. everyone have their strength and weakness! you TOO!! so BE STRONG alrite.. the most important is not how ppl look on you, is how you urself look upon urself. YOU CANT look down on urself.. be confidence and trust me tat u are not stupid nor useless!! =) i lOve you alwayz.. and will be here no matter wen!! if you need me.. im juz a call away!! tAke care alrite!!

so tired!! dun wish to do anything.. dun wish to touch on sch work!! wat i wish now is GAMING!! i wana play CS!! can kill ppl!! ahaha.. =X die..... going to be hooked!! better not sia.. later no time do the things i wana do!!

feel lyk taking neos now.. coz tat machine is SO COOL!! i wana go take again.. guess im jio-ing mei yun, vAnz and jessica ya!! hei hei.. OUR K SESSION!!! wen wen? ahem!! i miss K-ing!! ahaha..

SO SLEEPY now!! i tink i will be working on my template later.. trying to finish it during the holidays!!

juz suddenly.. miss my frenz in sec sch!! my dearest aiai..!! JOANNE..!! TANIA!! RUI FANG!! juniors..!! classmates..!! i tink everyone changed a lot!! but den i dun tink i have a great time in sec sch.. maybe due to the course of my ex bah.. i din really have time for my frenz..

i miss my ex...

i miss the smile..

the sweet talks..

holding hands..

the warmest hugz..

the bed..

the couple clothings..

the ring..

tigger..

doggie(girl girl)..

buttercup..

tarepanda..

hougang mall..

hougang green..

heartland mall..

bugis..

hougang plaza..

stadium..

track..

slippers..

roses..

snoopy and woodstock..

a lot a lot MORE!!

guess.. i really miss my ex a lot aR? =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:09:00 AM

THE GAMING DAY!!!

SUPER HIGH ya!! -grins- TODAY WAS FUN!!

the replies.

ade: i love my dearie a lot a lot a lot TOO!! muAckz!!

liting: im changing my template SOON!! waiting for my free time to finish it.. hmm.. hopefully it will be nice ya.. =) be patient and wait k.. ahaha.. =x

xiAowEizzzz: doing work still tag and view blog? yao si ar? ahaha.. =X pay attention on ur work la..

jessica: nvm ma.. no frenz.. no waiting.. no distraction.. can practice better.. =)

alrite.. super shag in the early morning.. went all the way to sch for test!! dun even have the intention to attend lesson.. but den im lyk tinking.. since im in sch, muz well attend den.. BUT mei yun told me tat her bf is waiting for her downstairs.. and she wun be attending lesson.. well!! SIAN HALF!! so.. in the end.. i oso din attend lesson.. =x juz ciao!!

waited for everyone to gather in the canteen.. dear came to fetch me. vAnz dun wana skipped sch.. no choice.. she missed a lot of lesson le i tink?? den we headed toward bugis for our breakfast and stuff.. was so curious about lan game.. vAnz and mei yun juz get so addicted recently lor.. duno why.. hmMmm..

had breakfast at mac.. after breakfast.. we went to play lan game.. it's kinda FUN!! im juz lyk a super BLUR QUEEN tat duno how to use com.. everything keys and instruction oso need mei yun to tell me wat to do.. gong dai sia.. ahaha.. =X mei yun introduce me to the game.. GENERAL.. something lyk war craft i tink.. ahaha.. can say it's a cute game.. but i tink i wun be addicted to it ya.. =x

finished gaming!! ARCADE!! i played rock fever 3.. time crisis and computer mahjong. hMMmm.. JUZ FUN FUN FUN lor.. nv realise gaming can be such enjoying!! i totally forget tat im SUPER shag and tired!! =x

after arcade.. went to shop.. dear bought a shoe for new yr.. NICE!! =) actually i wanted to get some tops and bottoms de.. but.. after much thought.. decided to save the money ya.. ahaha.. =x

went over to town after tat.. meet daniel and zaxius! played snooker and pool.. ahaha.. im the overall winner!! yeah!! =D i win all GUYS!! yeah!! =)

waited all day for ling's call.. finally she called ard 6pm.. walked over to far east and meet her to buy her dress. i juz have a lot to tok to her.. but there's juz too many ppl.. too noisy.. and someone is too sticky to her.. i cant even have much time toking to her.. SO SAD LOR!! =X

went back to hmv after dinner at scott. zaxius and daniel shopped for their clothes and shoes.. we took neos too!! will upload soon!! =)

after shopping and stuff.. we went over to cine to look for jayius! but she is not there.. so we went for meiyun they all insted!! =)

vAnz, alan, jason and mei yun is playing lan game.. so i join in too.. and i played CS!! FUN!! I can KILL ppl!! so cool!! FUN FUN!! ahaha..

so basically.. i had a gaming DAY rite?? ahaha.. =X

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:53:00 AM

Monday, January 31, 2005

you represent the begining of life. you are bright
and cheerful and love being who you are!

What part of life do you represent? ( AWESOME anime pics ^_^)
brought to you by Quizilla

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:31:00 PM

did i mention about my RJ??

Question: Do you think there’s a difference in the way men love and the way women love? Explain.

Response: YES. Of course there's a difference. The way men love a women is different from the way women love a men. Some guys feel that it is important that girl must understand him. Some guys feel that it is much more important that the girl love him more than he need to understand him.

Basically, this is base on individual. Everyone have different mindset about love and how they define love. Some guys feel that there's no difference and some girls feel that there's always a difference no matter what.

For me, I feel that there's a difference. Guy normally express their love in a different way as girl. There was once I came across this article about women and men.

Women have more imagination than men. They need to tell men how wonderful they are. They wish to be the perfect women for their men.

Women have their faults. Men have only two. Everything they say and everything they do. Men alway want women to obey men no matter. Whatever they say and whatever they do will alway be the final say.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. From the olden days, people alway have this mindset about men should be the one earning for the family where by women can only be a housewife wasting their youth at home. This is also called as male chavinust.

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. They can't complain about their depression to anyone as men don't like it. They can't go out with friends as men normally don't like women talking to another men. But when men are depressed, they invade to another country. They can have fun and enjoy themselves.

Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women have a more subtle instinct-they like to be a man's last romance.

Men alway feel that the only way to understand a woman is to love her and then it isn't necessary to understand her. While, this is kind of true. Women need to understand what men are thinking yet what women need is a man who love her and understanding might be unnecessary.

To women love is an occupation. To men it is a preoccupation.

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

Men marry because they are tired. Women marry because they are curious.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A woman will always cherish the memory of the man who wanted to marry her. A man will cherish the memory of the woman he didn't marry.

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman-before marriage and after marriage.

Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way and the other is to let her have it.

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man should forget his mistakes-no use two people remembering the same thing.

Some husbands are living proof that a woman can take a joke.

Husbands are like cars-all of them are good the first year.

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anthing a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Men will never give in to women. They will never ever understand the miserable in women.

Men alway take women for granted. They are normally insensative towards women. They will alway be jealous if women talk to another men. Men will start to suspect this and that when the men is only the women's normal friend.

Men love their face a lot. They will never ever admit their fault and apologise.

There's just too many differences to state already. But there will always be a difference. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:30:00 PM

the replies.

vAnz: NICE NICE!! vanz wear skirt or dress to sch lei.. we pei you.. comfirm chop okie?? ahaha.. see see.. everyone said tat it's nice!! heex.. anyway, if eric noe abt tis.. i tink he will wear sarong lor.. but cannot wear to sch la.. ahaha.. =x

annoymous: try getting video codes from here. CODES you juz need to find the songs you wan and paste in the code given to you will do.. paste the url in the location where you want your music video to be. very simple ya.. juz lyk instead or putting blogger codes, you put in the video codes. =)

jessica: i oso agree tat vanz will look nice in shirt.. but vanz la.. super not on.. SADDED!! so how's ur pool session on fri?? nice?? fun?? ahaha.. =x

mei mei: ya la... i oso agree... but i tink eric will wear sarong but not to sch la.. maybe meet him outside or wat? ahaha.. =X

ling: ya lor.. change video again.. ahaha.. where got more and more vain?? you oso very vain lor.. we are sisters.. ni hao bu dao na li qu!! ahaha.. =x

friday

MY OFF DAY!! heex.. and i slp and slp and slp the whole morning!!

woke up around 1pm.. mummy nagged at me.. wan me pei her go shopping.. so i went shopping with her and ah yi.. in the end.. i tink i was the one shopping ya.. coz i bought 2 giordano jeans!! surprise tat mum will buy for me.. coz i tink i bought a lot of clothes for new year le.. ahaha.. =X

went home for some rest.. super PMS and mood swinging up and down. cant make up my mind to go out anot.. in the end, quarrelled with dear and juz kao pei him.. oPPs.. sorry!! i din mean to throw my temper.. but juz cant control ma.. =x

after i cool down.. decided to go out den.. went down to monks.. no much ppl but i did enjoy la.. enjoy dancing and playing around.. i win tat BITCH in pool!! yeah!! the sight of her juz make me feel lyk vomiting!! yuCkz!! i muz win her and i WON!! yeah!!

den everyone started to play around.. leslie came and i played pool with her too.. FUN.. she's not bad ya.. quite pro in pool.. but i still win.. heex.. =x

a lot of jokers around us.. so it make our night not as boring.. especially leslie with her sentence saying.. "she look lyk a gay!" [i tink only we noe wat it means ya.. ahaha.. =X] went home after tat...

saturday

din even get enuff slp.. mum drag me off my bed.. we need to go bai bai.. so i spent my whole day at grandpa place just to rot.. coz got nothing to do.. den mei wana play mahjong.. so we play mahjong till quite late..

sunday

wen to play snooker with dear.. i thrash him.. but den we are still beginner.. so cannot say pro you see... i din even give him a chance to score.. im so bad rite? ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:32:00 AM

Thursday, January 27, 2005

the replies.

jessica: ahaha.. dUh~~ K maybe another day bah... hmMm.. next week will be a nice week!! *hint hint*

anonymous: firstly, you need to have music video.. den either you upload the video into a server or get it from website. juz paste in the url will do.. it's somehow similar to how you add a music into the blog..

had test tdy.. i dun have enough time to finish writing my essay qns!! sOb!!

anyway.. WE SKIPPED SCH TODAY!! WE meaning mei yun, vAnz, JESSICA and i!! i feel the same as jessica.. today is SUPER fun.. and there we go emphasizing SUPER!! ahaha.. =x ever since last week, we keep having naughty thoughts of skipping animation module. our team JUST SUX!! none of them noe how to do.. none of them can produce something "good" except jessica and i. we cant be possible to finish up 5 person work.. haiz.. due to the fact tat we are sick and tired of our team, we decided to be good to ourselves and give ourselves another OFF DAY for the week..!! =)

IT's A GIRLS OUTING!! juz 4 siao char bo talking and laughing the way to orchard.. talking about hair.. lame jokes and watever!! JUZ CRAP!! ahaha. I had big breakfast for breakfast!! yum yum!! but of coz.. as usual, i din manage to finish up everything. after breakfast, we walked all the way from lucky to far east.. i brought jessica and vanz to trim their eyebrows.. the outcome was NICE!! especially JESSICA.. she juz dun hv to draw anymore lor!! mei yun and i took a before and after photo of jessica! it's so damn different but NICE! and it's CHEAP!! it cost $6 only.. compare to inouvi.. wah.. much cheaper lor.. PLEASE thx me for bringing both of you there!! ahem.. =x heex..

shopping session den!! we din see vanz in skirt or dress before.. therefore we went into a shop and mei yun juz anyhow choose a dress and ask vanz to wear it. it look nice too.. ahaha.. =) Jessica said tat we had some fashion show at far east.. coz everyone juz keep trying on clothes.. EXCEPT HER!! ahem. trying hard to get van into a skirt one day.. den mei yun mention tat if jessica wear skirt, vanz oso have to wear.. and we got stupid thoughts of wearing the same clothes and same skirt to sch in future!! ahaha.. FUNNY!! Hopefully vAnz will wear a skirt if jessica wear too ya!! ahem! it's a promise rite? ONz ya!!

I juz buay tahan them lor.. all the way just EAT EAT EAT!! im so damn full and mei yun keep saying tat she is hungry!! -_- alamak.. they bought foods and we juz sit outside taka and eat.. while i drink my peach green tea!! heex..

PoOl session!! jessica.. i oso duno how to play!! ahaha.. juz bored to keep having a game after a game lor.. i started doing stunt in the middle of the game.. e.g throwing the cue around!! ahaha.. =x i need i need to practice more ya.. im trying to hit harder ball.. hmmm.. practice makes perfect.. so i shall not be lazy and PRACTICE MORE!!

opps.. we forgot about neoprints session!! haiz.. wasted.. and our K session!! juz find one day ya!! ahaha.. next week.... hmmm.. hint hint!! ahaha.. super holiday mood le lor.. opps.. =x

jessica is joining our ai mei club in no time!! ahaha.. actually not really "suddenly" click with us wat.. we are all along tat click but juz tat we din go out and shop together only rite? =)

i discover and downloaded alot of photoshop brushes!! i gonna design my new template soon!! yeah!! i juz have to design my very own background.. hopefully.. i will find time to do it ya.. heex.. =x juz damn funny lor.. knowing tat there's ut test the next day, so instead of studying for it, im there playing around with brushes and downloading brushes. Jessica busy designing her new blog design and mei yun filing and painting her nails. They will so excited over the brushes too wen i told them about it.. guess, they will be lyk me soon.. busy with their very own background and template le.. ahaha.. =x

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:41:00 PM

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

the replies.

ade: got a lot to do is better den rotting there and there's nothing to do rite? time will pass faster with more work.. =) the more you work, the more you earn rite.. ahaha.. i oso wana work!! help me look for work lei.. =X but i wan part time de..

xiao cinz: THANKS!! ahaha.. thx for ur compliment.. i lyk my hair alot too.. but some ppl juz duno how to appreciate and said tat im a demon.. but who cares.. i lyk it can le.. wahahah.. =X

jessica: JIE SI KA!! okie okie.. i will ask you along to LITTLE JOHNSON.. but actually, i dun really noe how to go lei.. guess we gotta ask henry JIE JIE bring us go le worz.. =x we shall go shopping more often.. gal and i shall transform you to be something lyk us.. ahaha.. =)

mei yun: gal ar.. i duno how to go.. ask henry jie jie bring us there la.. he is much more familiar with tat place la.. ahaha.. =x

jukes: lao gong!! miss miss!! dUh~ you saw me last thur lor.. ahaha.. so fast "long time no see" aR? ahaha.. den better be free for me.. meet up with me soon and often k.. =)

sadded!!! gal and i actually forgot about the outing with ah gong!! i tink we really disappoint him ya.. he's kind of disappointed... haiz.. i oso duno wat to say.. my fault to forget abt it.. but it's not tat i dun care.. it's not tat i dun have the heart to go for this outing.. im really sorry but i din mean to forget.. sOb.. hope ah gong understand.. -_-

had web application tdy.. stress for the whole day.. vb and sql keep giving me problem.. in the end, i uninstall and install everything again.. now it's back to normal.. actually tdy's problem is quite straight forward.. my program works in the end, but mei yun still cant find the problem for her program.. poor gal.. =x

had breakfast with jessica, mei yun, vAnz and company.. we are sitting together yet 2 different grp with different topics.. weird!! anyway.. nvm.. jessica, mei yun and i are too engross with our own topic.. and tat's about OUR HP!! duno who started off with the topic.. but each of us juz share our "dropping hp" experience!! ahaha.. funny topic rite? but it's funny lor!! =)

i tink jessica really kana influence by us le.. we are bringing her to trim her eyebrow soon!! ahaha.. and we still have pool session to complete.. hmmm.. COOL!! another shopping trip.. PLS PLAN!! friday is our OFF day.. hMMmm.. =) ahaha.. *hint hint*!! let's get everything done on friday den..

tml got test.. shall get some slp soon.. had not been resting well ya.. *yAwnz..

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:15:00 PM

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

the replies.

jay: hmm.. yeapx.. black is a nice place other den being too crowded la.. mdm wong? ahaha.. for ur info.. im juz 19.. i cant go in.. still UNDERAGE~ =X sadded rite? but i dun really lyk retro.. i prefer r & b or techno.. =)

xiaO ciNz: is tat a compliment? ahaha.. coz i tink there too many meaning to it le ya.. as in.. like or look at or a cutting remark? =x

well.. let's blog about yest.. it's kind of relaxing and i had the feeling of "relieve"? seriously.. i duno why do i feel tis way.. NORMALLY.. i dun touch on JAVA at all.. basically I HATE IT.. it's juz an irritating module and boring.. juz weird.. im just so hardworking out of the sudden.. i actually listen to hong shen and jessica wen they explain to me.. =) It's EASY actually!! ahaha.. therefore my team completed everything including the AC qns by 11+.. went out for lunch as we decided early in the morning.. canteen food really sux and im sian of it le.. -_-

went to lucky for lunch.. food there is nice as i mention in the previous post. I had the some food again.. coz it's really nice.. =) after lunch.. walked over to far east for eyebrow trimming.. $15 for it is kind of ex to me la.. but nvm la.. sometimes.. i juz had to pamper myself.. in the end, i started to test on blusher and eye shadow and i spent a total of $52 at inouvi!! BEST rite?? ahaha.. =X

guess jessica really enjoys shopping with us ya.. WE ARE GALS WITH FASHION TASTE!! not AUNTIE with BIG PIN!! opPss.. (jess and gal shld understand ya.. heex!) shUang rite!! ahaha.. =X i imagine jessica becoming more and more vain.. imagine she wear lyk us.. wah.. CHIO!! tat will be in my dream ya.. jessica has her own style.. and i believe her style will be much better den us!! =D

meet darling after sch.. she is waiting for me to shop with her.. see.. i told you.. TRUST my TASTE!! indeed she found her long wanted dress and i swear.. she really look nice in it!! =) we din really spent a lot of time together.. coz.. her beloved boy wanted to go for a JOG!! ahem.. and she got NO CHOICE but to go home with him.. sadded though.. coz im so excited over the outing yet we dun even have the chance to sit down.. eat together.. or chit chat.... hAiz.. nvm la... i shall wait for the next outing den.. anyway, i need to bring her to buy her dress at gal's working place.

hAd system analysis UT today.. overall.. i tink it's quite okie.. at least i understand some of it la.. ahaha.. had the same module today too.. ever since i changed into this new team.. i CANT slack at all.. im really doing work!! really study on it.. read up resources and discuss with my team mates.. maybe it's somehow good for me?? anyway.. problem tdy is easy.. rather straight forward.. =)

alrite.. i shall mention about my dad's joke!! my whole family went compass point to shop. i wanted to buy a new heel. my dad looked ard the shopping mall and he brought me into charles and keith.. i din really lyk the design so he told me to go over metro.. i still dun lyk.. and now.. he want me to go over "little johnson"!! I LAUGH OUT LOUD!! followed by my sis and mum.. he's trying to mean "John Little" yet he misinterpret as "little johnson"..

i told alot of ppl around me about tis joke from my dad.. everyone understands and get wat my dad means.. but THE BIGGEST JOKE EVER!! i told henry about tis joke.. he pause for awhile.. and tell me.. "little johnson is at CENTERPOINT THERE RITE?" once again.. I LAUGH OUT LOUD!! followed by gal and baby.. OMG!!!! he is as blur as sotong!! we are there laughing le.. yet he's trying to figure out why we laugh.. after 1 - 2 mins.. he says.. "bu shi little johnson meh?? (pause) oh.... is John Little!!" oh my..... WE LOL AGAIN!!! ahaha.. =x

we went for pool session again.. it had been quite some time ever since i last touch the pool table or anything gotta do wif pool.. i thought i forgot how to play le.. but the game was great.. i manage to win a few games before my hand start aching.. in the middle of a game with gal.. my hand suddenly ache and i juz miss my cue.. i guess is bcoz i accidently hit my hand against the wall and tat's why it hurts at tat very point of time. i tink i have been stressing too much on my left hand le.. been using my left hand to carry a lot of stuff recently.. therefore maybe i strain it bah.. =x

Extract from Jessica's blog.

To everyone out there who's dreaming of those kind of sweet and romancing love.. don't ever fall in love because of wanting to fall in love ok?! You are just wasting each others' time.. and definitely not being fair to the other party. Furthermore.. it really isn't easy being in a relationship and maintaining it.

And for those out there who are in a relationship.. cherish each other ok.. and treasure what's in front of you. For those who are not in a relationship.. same thing lo.. treasure what you have in front of you too.. because its definitely different after entering a relationship.

A relationship is really one of multi-flavours.. it's like travelling down a road where you can't see what's coming up. Sometimes its a smooth and straight road in front.. sometimes its full of curves (ups and downs in other words).. and sometimes rocky. But one thing special.. the driver is the two of you (who are in the relationship).. and the vehicle is the love you have for each other. Whether to drive the car carefully (trying to avoid any accidents).. or to drive it recklessly and end up crashing.. then.. well.. its up to the couple yea? Anyway.. treasure and cherish! Be ready to change for each other.. and be ready to accept each other ok?!

alrite.. jessica was lyk thanking her dear and frenz but NO ME!! sadded!! cRies!! =( ahaha.. joking.. anyway.. refering to wat jess had type.. it is indeed very philosopical to those who duno wat love is all about.. anyway.. i agree with wat she wrote ya.. it's really hard to maintain a relationship.. either parties have to give in and tolerate.. and it is true tat.. "the only certain about the future is the uncertainty it brings."

therefore.. be careful wen you are about to walk into any relationship.. respect one another decision and dun waste ppl's time if you never gonna be serious at all..

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:40:00 PM

Monday, January 24, 2005

the replies.

liting: alrite.. where's ur pic aR? ahaha.. =X

ling: darling gal.. im so excited to meet you tdy!! HAPPY!! my hair is "doing" fine.. and i lyk the colour.. but i tink it will fade quite easily.. hopefully it dun fade tat soon ya.. I MISS YOU SO MUCH!!

jessica: welcome welcome.. you alwayz help me too ma.. ritE?? =) duh... i tink we will go bonker in any moment if they continue lyk tis ya!! -__-

ade: dearie!! sorrie.. i have been so busy tat i hardly reply ur meg and stuff... really sorry!! *pull ears* dun be sad sad ya.. guess ur job muz be boring!! anyway.. im looking for part time job.. help me look out alrite? ahaha.. =X

wah.. alrite.. i have not been blogging again.. =X just BUSY BUSY BUSY!!

chinablack on thurday was GREAT~!! i bet ah gong is missing out alot alot of fun ya.. =X

anyway.. gotta meet up with lao gong again!! FINALLY get him to chiong with me!! ahaha.. so cool ya!! well.. was with dear at ps actually.. den waited for daniel to meet us.. we waited for him from 6pm to 730pm!! gosh!! daniel super vain lor.. spent hours to "doll up" himself lor!! ahem!!

after meetin daniel, went over to meet jay and my lao gong!! hAPpy!! excited!! wah.. cooooll!! im with my dear and lao gong!! perfect match..!! makes me super flirt lyk tat.. =X ahaha.. nOpe.. dun mistaken!! super goodie frenz nia.. ahaha.. had dinner at lucky.. the herbal soup there was NICE!! and i LOVE the steam egg!! it cost $0.50 nia!! cheap and nice!! try it.. it's at lucky food court!!

dear and lao gong meet their primary school frenz there.. juz weird lor.. normally it will be quite "hard" to meet ppl at lucky lor.. coz it is not a place to shop or watever lor.. but but but.. happened tat they meet their pri sch frenz and i meet my poly frenz!! ahaha.. juz qiao lor.. saw ah zhi.. he is meeting da jie later.. ahem!! something wrong with them ar? ahaha.. RUMOR SPREADING ARD TAT THEY ARE TOGETHER!! ahaha.. =X

after dinner.. dear, jay and daniel stay at lucky to play pool, i accompany ah zhi and lao gong to meet da jie and lao gong's frenz.. im lyk "begging" da jie to go chinablack with us lor.. but ah zhi la.. super sissy!! dun wan!! hmmPPff!! irritating!! =X

finally.. we all went over to black without da jie and ah zhi!! reach there... wah!! SUPER PACKED!! LONG LONG QUEUE!! kaoz.. i thought we had to queue BUT we dun have to!! ahaha.. ah bee got me in with the members' only queue!! COOL!! we go in with a cheaper price and shorter queue!! ahaha.. everyone juz look at us and we juz.. lalala.. go in liao!!

took the stupid lift up.. wah.. ALOT OF PPL LOR!!! super pack!!! hardly have anymore place to dance lor.. but we squeeze a place out..!! ahaha.. =X and lao gong manage to get some chairs and table!! so we juz stand ard there the whole night.. IT's FUN ya... the atmosphere was GREAT!! DRINKS was GREAT!! but ppl there aint great except us.. i juz laugh my way out lor.. gals standing on the table dancing the same move for all type of song.. FAT guy standing on the table shaking their butt.. irritating guy putting their hand up in the air with super heavy BO!! couple standing on the table dancing sexy dance.. couple + one extra snatching place to dance by bumping each other butt!! i juz stand ther.. see show and LAUGH!! ahaha.. duh~ of coz got dance too la.. THE MUSIC is GREAT!! love it!! R & B!! COOL!!

wen im really enjoying with my frenz.. there's tis guy standing on the stage keep "hitting" my head lor!! SUPER IRRITATING.. i tink he is TOO SHORT!! though he is standing on the stage, he still can hit my head!! if it is accidently.. i dun mind lor.. but is ALOT of time lor.. I SUPER HOT SIA.. and i throw my tissue on him after cleaning off my sweat...!! SUCKS!! stinko cum short cum ugly cum irritating cum stupid hairstyle guy jus TURN ME OFF!!! dear and lao gong noe tat im angry le.. they juz keep pulling me away from tat stinko guy.. but he seems to "love" hitting my head alot ya.. though i stand on the other side le.. he is still able to HIT my head!! wat the fuck?? really hot ar.. wanted to ask him down and give him one tight slap ya.. but duH~~ dear help me push him down the stage.. ahaha.. =X

we left around 2+ coz it is really TOO PACKED!! den went over to white dot instead.. it's my frenz's frenz working place.. dun need cover charge.. juz go in and enjoy drinks and music.. a nice place to chill ya.. but not a nice play to chiong.. coz music SUX!! =X

went over to edo sushi for supper.. den went home le.. dear was drunk.. duno wat he drink oso.. ahaha..

i juz slack all the way on fri, sat and sun.. other den helping dear work.. my extra time is sleeping.. eating.. tv.. and rotting!! ahaha.. juz no time to online.. no time to go out lor.. or either.. no mood to go online and no mood to go out.. heex.. =)

anyway.. days with dear and lao gong was GREAT!! but i had been missing darling mei and sunzi alot.. haiz.. they are too busy for me?? no no.. darling is too broke for me.. as for sun zi.. duno wat she had been doing ya.. msg her but no reply.. sadded!! =(

i miss those days.............................................................. the 3 of us shop ard town..... go chiong together.. doing stupid thing together... tok rubbish on the fone everyday.. haiz.... i juz miss.... those days and miss darling mei and sun zi alot ALOT!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:03:00 AM

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

the replies.

liting: so wat's wrong with all the laugher from you?? ahem!! ahaha.. =X

celeste: ahem.. i wher got hao lian? we are good example ma.. muz learn from us okie? ahaha.. =X jia you for you and xue too!! muAckz.. miSs miss!!

ade: ahaha.. there's no such thing la.. tootz.. where are you working at??

alrite.. i got pink hair now.. but not really satisfield with the colour.. so im going to touch up again.. heex.. =)

my mum and dad din scold me about my hair!! COOL!! ahaha.. they are the coolest parent rite? ahaha..

anyway.. CHINABLACK on THURSDAY!!!!!! hopefully.. mei yun and van will go with me.. and ling oso!!! miss playing and have fun together... by the way.. those going.. pls confirm with me how many tickets you all need alrite?? =)

been missing sch tis 2 days.. hmm.. partly is coz i thought is OPEN HSE!! dUh~ im blur alrite.. i only realise wen mei yun told me.. ahaha.. =X but mainly.. IM SICK!! =( flu.. cough.. gastric flu.. slight fever.. tired!! argh.. im getting weak rite? i seldom fall sick de lor.. but juz suddenly.. i fall sick so often.. -_-??

will resume sch tml.. hopefully im not missing too much of lesson ya.. ahaha.. alrite.. dun worry ppl.. im fine.. will go to sch tml okie! ahaha.. =X

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:59:00 PM

Sunday, January 16, 2005

the replies.

liting: ahaha.. sure.. take a nice nice one and i will put it up.. but wait till i tink of a design first bah.. heex.. anyway.. CAMP?? missing camp alot ya.. been a long tym ever since i last "camped"! ahaha..

ade: rusty hair? hmm.. i suit meh? actually.. i dun really noe is there a kind of bird name hou niao lei.. i tink it's juz a title bah.. "hou - back" & "niao - bird"?? ahaha.. lame translation!! fAintz..

jessica: yaya.. i recall.. she sang Belief.. ahaha.. =)

ah gong: yeah!! i noe.. my ah gong is the best.. i mean as in other den you.. no one going with me le.. but now.. wahaha.. i tink will be alot ya.. COOL!! we will have fun together..!! =)

ling: pink? i dye pink before le.. actually.. im tinking of cherry red.. hmmm.. should i?? ahaha.. my school hack care de.. so.. i shall dye watever colour i lyk.. heex.. jealous hor?? wahaha.. =X

steph: duh~ aiai.. is a concert tat should not be missed!! ahaha.. it's really nice ya.. kk.. sure.. i put ur pic too.. send me one nice nice de okie!! heex.. =)

i have been missing out alot right? sorry for not blogging.. not my fault.. is my stupid lappy fault!! now.. i got a "brand new" lappy!! it had a new hardisk!! therefore.. it means tat.. NO SONGS!! NO PICTURES!! NOTHING AT ALL!! it's totally blank!!

who's fault?? IT HELPDESK!!!!!!!!!

actually i knew that there something very wrong with my lappy le.. it juz keep auto restart and hang... worried!! so trying to use all method to solve it..

my method - my lappy is not dead yet.. but it runs very slowly.. BUT not to the extend of cannot USE!!

so i seek help from IT helpdesk coz i cant afford to let my lappy runs so slowly.. thinking of reformatting my C drive if i have no choice.. so.. i BACK UP everything to my D drive..

IT HELPDESK method - after much TRIAL and ERROR, they still cant find out the problem.. so.. their ONLY resort and wat i had expected!! REFORMAT!!! alrite.. so i shall let my C drive rest in peace and hand it over to the IT HELPDESK for ONE WHOLE NIGHT!!

to my "surprise"... IT HELPDESK "solved" my problem!! They really made my whole lappy REST IN PEACE!! now.. i totally CANNOT use my lappy!! cant even go to dos.. cant even go anywherE!!

IT HELPDESK another method - bring down to Kallang.. to toshiba service center!!! so.. i skipped my lesson.. coz i totally cant go for class.. cant even borrow a lappy frm library.. and off i go to Kallang in the BIG BIG morning!! lucky dear accompany me there.. if not, i will lose my way for sure!!

Toshiba Service Center method - hardisk corrupted!! CHANGE HARDISK!! i cant even retrieve my data from D drive...!!! sadded!!! so... i hand my lappy to them and waited for 1 hour!! and now.. MY LAPPY IS BACK TO NORMAL!! *phew*

the morale of the story is.. IT HELPDESK is USELESS!! please consult ur lappy service center directly wen you encounter serious problem in ur lappy!! juz damn pissed off with IT HELPDESK recently... argh!!

so ppl!! please send me photos if you have my photos.. no matter my solo pic or pictures tat took in grps with me ard.. JUZ SEND!! nice songs oso SEND SEND SEND!! in need of all tis!!! =)

being sick is the ever most terrible thing!! had been SICK for days le.. my condition is getting from bad to worse.. duno wat's wrong wif me.. flu.. cough.. now fever!! damn weak sia!! argh!! i dun wana be sick!! anyone can cure me?? sObz...

lao gong came to visit me on friday!! HAPPY!!!!! his right shoulder was dislocated on tue and i juz got to noe it on thur.. wat a lao po am i.. haiz.. anyway.. hope tat he will recover soon.. and oso lyk the stuff i bought for him.. =) miss him so much.. muAckz.. hUgz.. LOVE LOVE!!

SICK AND TIRED!!!!! argh!!

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:19:00 AM

Monday, January 10, 2005

tired! as usual.. suppose to go out with mummy tdy.. but she is not free to entertain me.. so meet dear after sch.. took a short nap at his place.. as im really super tired..

tdy is our anni.. and i bought him 3 pairs of socks.. the gel he need and 1 packet of gummy sweets. lame rite? heex.. but duh~ i duno wat to give anymore.. i seems to give alot of things before le.. so i juz anyhow buy.. somemore short of cash ma.. so so so.. anything la.. he oso dun mind! yet very happy over the 3 pair of socks i bought! =_=

im SERIOUSLY on diet!! i drink plenty of water and a packet of fresh milk while vAnz, gal, henry and jon were eating their BIG BREAKFAST.. im there drinking MILK!! i wana slim down so much!! the fresh milk last the whole day.. and i drink plenty of water!! oh my.. maine, continue this way alrite!! ahaha.. =X

was sadded.. i really wana go Chinablack on 20th Jan.. but lao gong is not free to go.. gal and vAnz still not confirm.. sadDed!! I WANA GO!! haiz... somemore, ah bee will be there.. yiying jie might be going too.. im so wanted to go.. but no one wana accompany me.. SOB!! LING!! where are you? i miss you so much!! you pei me go hao ma?? =(

i need to dye my hair!! i wana dye my hair!! wat colour?? pls suggest ya.. vAin pot here ya.. ahaha.. my hair is so precious to me tat i dun dare to anyhow dye it.. scared it will ruin my hair.. i's so fragile.. i actually intend to dye cherry red.. but previously i dyed red.. i wana try purple now.. shld i?? or any other colour tat will suits me??

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:34:00 PM

the replies.

liting: PUT UR PHOTOS?? ahaha.. alrite.. you send me one.. and i put it up!! ahem.. are you sure you wan it this way? i dun mind ya.. ahaha.. =X

ade: dearie!! ahaha.. alrite.. i trust you.. can see from how you blogged ya.. indeed rather tough and lame ya.. wat bird la.. it is a song title.. by SHE..

vAnz: aiyo.. i oso wish tat i can have one.. but den my family members allegic with pets.. haiz.. sadded!! arbo.. i get one den you help me yang la.. ahaha.. =X

SHE's concert was GREAT!!!! SUPER HIGH!! SUPER FUN!! SUPER FUNNY!! SUPER PERFECT!! my sis juz HIGH all the way.. but pls bear in mind tat.. watching concert with her is kinda boring!!! BORING!! ahaha.. she dun scream.. dun jump.. dun show excitement.. simply.. somehow NO EXPRESSION at all.. until the last part.. when everyone was HIGH to the extend tat also make my sis to stand up and HIGH together.

Part One
Bo Si Mao - The starting of the whole concert. They appeared in the egyptian style of costume to go along with the song.

I.O.I.O - She's fans will noe the "dance" for I.O.I.O.. we were asked to dance with them.

Yuan Fang & Re Dai Yu Ling - For the slow songs, my sis and i juz sit back, relax.. listen and as the same time, sing along with them.

Part Two
Watch Me Shine, Ni Kuai Le Wo Sui Yi & Gei Wo Duo Yi Dian - It's all dance songs!! They changed into another costume IN FRONT OF US!! ahaha.. kinda cute.. all of them are in white.. and they started singing and dancing at the same time. It was perfect! FUN! and it was live!! they managed to sing and dance at the same time. But the imperfect part was the sound system.. the sound system cannot really take high pitched and loud sounds.. so it'll always start buzzing when hebe is like piao-ing the high notes.. and then the music will like.. "jump" and make alot of noise.. so tat's the only imperfect part bah..

Part Three
Ai Qing De Hai Yang - It was sang by Hebe.. she appeared in a really GREAT costume. the chinese style as they describe it. she wore a super long dress with a super "cheena" umbrella.. BUT it look so nice!! i love the dress!!

Selina - oPps.. seriously.. i cant remember wat she sing.. but she wore a super long dress too.. and i guess her dress looks very grand!! GREAT GREAT GREAT!!

Chang Xiang Si - This was by Ella. she wore a dress too!! but not a super long one. consider short compare to Selina and Hebe. But she looks GREAT too!! Oh ya.. she had a 'fan' to go along with her costume. LOOKS CUTE!!

Part Four
Shi Mian Mai Fu - After all romantic solo songs, they strip in front of us again. Just in a few second time, they changed into another costume and start their singing and dancing again.

Ta Hai Shi Bu Dong - This is a song from the korean style. My heart nearly melt upon listening to the song!!

Ai Ne - ppl who noe me well will noe that i love tis song alot.. my sis and i juz sing along with them and of coz.. it's alwayz our KTV style.. she sings Ella's part and i sing Hebe and Selina's part.

Luo Da Yu - specially mention about all the producer of their music. Selina specially mention about the producer of this song. coz is her idol!! David Tao!! Ella was GREAT in her rapping!! so cool!!

Part Five
SHE's de di yi ci - They took a longer time to change their costume this time. Meanwhile, they played a short video clip for us to view since there's no special guest. BUT the clip was enjoyable!! recall how they started off with the career and stuff. Ella was the first one to cry.. futhermore.. she cried when they were showing a video on selina's graduation.. as Selina saw Ella crying.. she cant help it but started crying too. Hebe only cried when they were thanking the people who had helped them throughout the years. that was the first time she cried during this tour of concerts..

Part Six
Remember & Tian Shi Zai Chang Ge - Their 5th costume. Firstly, there was a guy in a super big "angel wing" dancing around the stage.. than they appear in ALL white again.. Hebe costume attract my attention most!! coz it is super "roundly" okie.. there's no such word.. but it is really VERY CUTE!!

Only Lonely & Ban Tang Zhu Yi - Ella said that we will never be lonely if we listen to SHE's song! i guess so ya? coz the song only lonely explains everything.. there's REALLY.. NOTHING WRONG BEING SINGLE!! ahaha..

Hou Niao - They sit on the dolphin and sang the song with all their love..

Hua Duo Kai Hao Le - After sharing their experience of filming "Qiang Wei Zhi Lian", they sang the theme of the drama. the best parts were when sHe was talking.. they were so funny.. cracking jokes about themselves and den laughing at each other.. they really have the mo qi ya..

Part Seven
Mei Li Xin Shi Jie, Beauty Up My Life, Mo Li & Always On My Mind - It's PARTY time!! their 6th costume!! It's so nice!!! So cute still!! Their costume is fantastic!! seriously.. FANTASTIC!!

Peng You Zu Qu - Sharing their thoughts of the recent tsunami natural disasters, they encourage their fans to do their part to the society.. try our best to help the needy.. They delicated the following items to all of us. It's call the Peng You Zu Qu where they sang all types of song that is meaningful and represent friendship.

Part Eight
ENCORE!! - Tong Kuai & Super Star - Their last costume. the ENCORE part!! EVERYONE WAS SO HIGH!! As mention above.. my sis and i stand by and jump and sing together!! totally no image.. but who cares!! have fun together ma!! ahaha.. =X

so tat's all for the concert.. pic will be uploaded soon soon soon!! TOO HIGH le!! ahaha..

visited meiyun at her work place today.. she really seems to be very slack ar.. ahaha.. well.. i really wana work.. but why there's no part time job for me? so sad lor.. hmmppff.. bought a top at her work place.. i lyk it ya.. though i still feels tat i look fat on it.. ahaha.. nvm nvm.. DIET!!

tired tired tired!! TOO HIGH to slp after SHE concert.. im so tired now!! going to get some slp soon before going to sch.. SIAN!!

oh ya... im suppose to blog something about nic.. yeapx.. so HELLO!! im blogging about you!! i wana record songs into my MD.. pls help me borrow the MD player from ur frenz!! here's ONE sentence!! anyway, dun bluff urself by saying you dun have feeling for that person when you mind so much about her.. tis is lyk running away from the reality lor.. see.. the post you blogged was just sunday morning lor.. how can feelings disappear SUDDENLY rite?? think about it alrite.. missing and loving a person isnt wrong! but worth loving and missing anot is up to you ya.. dun be silly again k.. and be positive ya.. =) HERE's ALOT OF SENTENCE.. so in return, blog about me den!! ahaha..

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:30:00 AM

Saturday, January 08, 2005

the replies.

meiyun: you jian wat fei la.. im the one tat need to jian man!! i need to slim down!! my expected weight is 52kg!! JIA YOU mAinez!!

jessica: ahaha.. long long long way sia.. ahem.. anyway.. guan yin ma.. i oso wish you jian fei chen gong.. coz i noe you oso wana jian fei.. let's all work hard and JIA YOU!!

steph: aiai.. of coz will have you la.. coz my heart got you ma.. =) hopefully im not forgotten by you wor. =)

im.. TIRED!! but duh~ happy still!! was actually "stress" over meiyun's blog.. coz im helping her to design it. BUT i manage to solve the "ugly" part i dun wan and make it nicer. was so damn HAPPY wen i completed the whole template!!

anyway.. i juz realised tat i had been helping alot of frenz on their new template yet i haven even change mine!! *no idea* at all.. i dun lyk to copy others.. so decided to think of something much creative. =P

vAnz has a rabbit.. and im so tempted to have one too.. but den.. im afraid tat i dun have the time to look after it and my dad and mum dun allow.. sadded.. i cant have a tu zai zi!! tat's wat vAnz called the rabbit!! ahaha..

i meet dear straight after sch.. we went pasar malam.. FUN!! though there's nothing much to buy and shop around, but i enjoyed the time with dear!! =) we bought a lot of food back home for dinner.. but he is complaining hungry 2 hours after our dinner.. BIG EATER sia!! lyk all along one lor.. ahaha.. =X

NUS bash on 20th Jan!! my dearest frenz.. join me with the fun alrite?? i wana go.. coz my cousin is going.. and i'll be able to see them and enjoy together!! happy happy!!!

i learnt tat no matter wat, i have to be satisfied with watever i have now. after all, im not the worst one. therefore, whoever tat do something small for me.. i oso will feel so grateful about it.. =) will be a better person tat is nice to bully ritE?? ahaha.. =X

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:58:00 AM

Thursday, January 06, 2005

the replies.

jessica: married ar? ahaha.. still long way to go lei.. wish me jian fei cheng gong alrite?? ahaha.. =X

ade: dearie.. ur job seem to be tough and lame... ahaha.. anyway.. translate more chinese songs!! try S.H.E - Hou Niao. its a new song!!

vAnz: yeapx.. you too!! happy alwayz wif ur HAO DA YI ZHI WEN ZI!! *bless bless*

liting: ahaha.. wat are you unsatisfied about? i prefer to put more pics still.. ahaha.. anyway new layout wun be out so soon.. sch work is increasing!! TIRED!!

seriously.. i seems to have alot to blog.. but wen i reach this page.. i duno wat should i blog.

am not feeling very good.. not really in a good mood. I REALLY tried my best not to throw temper le.. but things tat he do really make me super pissed off!! i nv blame him for overslept.. nv blame him for spending too much.. nv blame him for not able to get things tat i wan.. i really.. nv blame anything.. somehow, i noe who can afford and who cant... im not totally an understanding gal.. but i really dun deserve any ill treatment from anyone!!

All tat i do is to swallow down my complain and cry alone...... somehow..... im tired of all tis.. but i nv wana give up... this is the power of L-O-V-E!

ANGEL_scribbled * -11:33:00 PM

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

ANGEL_scribbled * -1:40:00 AM